getacloo2

Today, my husband passed a massive kidney stone. He is so proud of it that he wants to decorate our home with it. It is now sitting on my kitchen counter next to my produce. FML

Today, my boyfriend asked me out to dinner, which we never do. While at the restaurant he gets down on his knees, looks me in the eyes, and pulls out a little box. He opens it and inside is a note that says 'We're Done.' He then leaves me at the restaurant with the bill and the $2.00 box. FML