SAgirl

lordoftheweird · 30 April 2026, 09:00 ·Cranbrook, Canada

Parents of the year

Today, I found out that I have been secretly paying the bills. All the psych treatments and medication tryouts I took as a kid was paid research. My parents spent all the money on themselves and they still wanted me to do the research. They also lied to my school and told them I was autistic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 506 You deserved it 68

1 comment Share

Anonymous · 30 April 2026, 12:00 ·United States

Insecure

Today, I came home to a huge man cleaning my kitchen. I demanded to know who the hell he was and It turned out that he’s the “maid” my wife hired after I told her that if she wanted help cleaning the house, then we could just hire some. His name is Ted and she’s refusing to get rid of him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 82 You deserved it 734

5 comments Share

Anonymous · 28 April 2026, 22:00 ·United States

Power move

Today, I took my kids and left my wife because she's been drinking, which I absolutely forbid. Now she's going on social media saying I kidnapped them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 209 You deserved it 618

4 comments Share

Anonymous · 21 April 2026, 12:00 ·United Kingdom

Antiques roadshow

Today, we needed to get an antique dresser downstairs for sale. While I was fetching a cart to wheel it down safely, my wife and boys decided to impress me by carrying it. The plaster on the walls now needs repair, as does the banister and glass front door. Plus the dresser is now unsellable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 464 You deserved it 61

0 comment Share

Anonymous · 22 April 2026, 20:00 ·United States

Who's the asshat in this scenario?

Today, my mom told me that I will never see my siblings again because I refused to attend her wedding to another woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 214 You deserved it 891

7 comments Share

Anonymous · 18 April 2026, 22:00 ·United States

I hate surprises

Today, my husband and kids apparently forgot my birthday. I was so happy at first because I have always hated my birthday, and thought it could just be another day on the calendar. No. They planned and threw a massive surprise party for me when I got home from work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 200 You deserved it 375

2 comments Share

May · 17 April 2026, 00:00 ·United States

What in the world…?

Today, I noticed I was overcharged at a fast food place, so I asked the cashier to correct it. He got an attitude, so I asked for the manager. The next thing I know, some dude shoved me, yelling, "Shut the fuck up Karen." I fell and hit my head. People in line laughed and cheered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 472 You deserved it 121

1 comment Share

Anonymous · 17 April 2026, 03:00 ·Manchester, United Kingdom

Smoke em if you've got em

Today, I miss drugs and now I'm depressed, and now the world is fucked so there is no other option. FML

I agree, your life sucks 134 You deserved it 335

2 comments Share

Anonymous · 17 April 2026, 09:00 ·United States

Dynasty

Today, my grandparents are demanding that I come live with them because my stepmom is pregnant. They're convinced that she and my dad are going to throw me aside once the baby is born, even though I know that's not going to happen. They're even making threats. FML

I agree, your life sucks 347 You deserved it 60

1 comment Share

Anonymous · 17 April 2026, 15:00 ·United Kingdom

Cost of living crisis

Today, I had an interview to be a teaching assistant. Part of the interview was to give a short reading exercise to 5 kids, which I did. I was marked down and ultimately didn’t get the job because I didn’t provide my own paper for the kids to write on. I'd used paper from the classroom. WHAT THE F…? FML

I agree, your life sucks 497 You deserved it 58

2 comments Share

Jim · 9 April 2026, 20:00 ·United States 🌶️ Spicy

Happy birthday, huh?

Today, it's was my birthday. My wife did not get me anything or do anything for me. Instead, she said, "I'll knock an extra day off your sex ban." Sadly, this is probably the nicest thing she's done for my birthday in several years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 558 You deserved it 146

4 comments Share

Anonymous · 8 March 2024, 22:00 ·United Kingdom

The Crazy World of Arthur Brown

Today, at work, our new chef managed to start a grease fire. We couldn’t put it out because he managed to splash the flaming grease onto the fire extinguisher. Yes, we couldn’t put out a fire because our fire extinguisher was on fire. The fire department guys just laughed and laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 574 You deserved it 114

2 comments Share

Anonymous · This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff ·New Ulm, United States

Been there, done that

Today, my blind date turned out to be my gynecologist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 324 You deserved it 4 682

94 comments Share

Bitchy girl who doesn't put out · 7 April 2026, 09:00 ·Naaldwijk, The Netherlands 🌶️ Spicy

Needs

Today, I suspected something was up when my boyfriend snuck out of bed after he thought I fell asleep. I caught him jerking to porn in the living room and got really upset. He actually got mad, saying, "I have needs and you never put out and get bitchy when I try." FML

I agree, your life sucks 126 You deserved it 939

3 comments Share

Anonymous · 8 April 2026, 09:00 ·Corona, United States

Advice wanted

Today, I’m about to lose the love of my life. I love this man with every fiber of my being, but his kids are absolute fucking monsters. They treat me like shit and he doesn’t intervene. I’m so heartbroken, but what else can I do? FML

I agree, your life sucks 513 You deserved it 90

2 comments Share

Anonymous · 3 April 2026, 20:00 🌶️ Spicy

Pure evil

Today, my daughter admitted that she was the one who left all the used condoms in the back of my ex-husband's car, which led to us getting a horrible divorce because I thought he cheated and didn't believe him. I never suspected her for a minute. FML

I agree, your life sucks 249 You deserved it 547

2 comments Share

Anonymous · 4 April 2026, 15:00

Trial by social media

Today, I told my late husband's daughter that I have no interest in reconciliation because she was horrible to me the entire time we were married, and never once warmed up to me, no matter what I tried. Now she's telling everybody on social media that I really am an evil wicked witch stepmom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 428 You deserved it 115

1 comment Share

please love me · 3 April 2026, 22:00

Baby daddy drama

Today, I was on a first date with a really nice guy and, of course, when there was an awkward silence, I started talking and realized too late that I was running through my usual complaints about my worthless baby daddies. He asked how many and I said three, and he left without a word. FML

I agree, your life sucks 81 You deserved it 1 115

3 comments Share

Anonymous · 4 April 2026, 03:00 ·United States

Seems reasonable

Today, my husband kicked me out because I told him I'm having an abortion. He just doesn't understand that with the way our country is right now, and how bad the economy is, it's just not a good idea to have kids at the present time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 442 You deserved it 670

6 comments Share

Anonymous · 4 April 2026, 09:00

Saboteur

Today, I caught my sister red-handed trying to frame my husband for cheating. She's always been jealous that I'm in a happy marriage and she's only 31 and has already been divorced five times. I can't go no contact with her because she has two boys who I absolutely adore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 475 You deserved it 108

3 comments Share

Anonymous · 3 April 2026, 12:00

Boredom

Today, I'm still unemployed after almost a year because my last job couldn't transfer me when my wife and I had to move due to her job. I can't even find something like grocery store or fast food. Seriously beginning to resent her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 341 You deserved it 200

3 comments Share

Fuck space exploration give me human rights · 2 April 2026, 09:00

Shadowboxing

Today, my whole family was so excited about watching the Artemis II launch and scolded me for not mustering more enthusiasm. Great, we can go to space now… so anytime someone talks about real issues like climate change or racism, we'll hear, "Well just go to space then" or "Space will solve our problems." FML

I agree, your life sucks 230 You deserved it 501

6 comments Share

Anonymous · 3 April 2026, 00:00

On the move

Today, my wife and I realized that we made a huge mistake in allowing our son to stay behind and live with my parents when we had to move cross-country due to work. Our lives are so empty without him and we're missing out on watching him grow up, but he refuses to come live with us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 92 You deserved it 652

4 comments Share

Anonymous · 2 April 2026, 20:00

The good son

Today, my husband and I sat our 8 year-old son down and gently explained to him that I had a miscarriage and he won't be having a little brother or sister after all. He responded by dancing around the room and celebrating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 442 You deserved it 110

1 comment Share

117 stitches and a psych hold · 1 April 2026, 00:00

Devil child

Today, after my 14 year-old son brought home six Fs on his report card, we decided to take away all his video games and sell them. He screamed for hours, then went into the kitchen and started smashing glasses against his head, "until we brought back his games." FML

I agree, your life sucks 293 You deserved it 514

5 comments Share

Henry · 29 March 2026, 20:00

First day

Today, I started a new job and wanted to seem organized, so I brought a homemade lunch in a container. I went to heat it up, but forgot to remove the lid completely. The container exploded in the microwave, covering the inside with sauce. I spent my lunch break cleaning it while my coworkers smirked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 145 You deserved it 353

0 comment Share

DontheRon · 26 March 2026, 20:00

Toxic

Today, I reported the girl I like’s new boyfriend to be trespassed from our workplace for being disruptive. I’m sick of him coming in and bringing her lunch and acting lovey dovey. My plan successfully worked, he is no longer welcome on the premises, but now half the office hates me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 You deserved it 1 252

8 comments Share

UnFit · 27 March 2026, 00:00

Pace yourself

Today, I've always been a healthy person with a normal body and average BMI. My husband is a fitness freak with a super body. When I expressed interest in starting working out, he laughed at me and said, "Trust me, you're not the fitness kind. I've tried." What hurt me most is that it's true. FML

I agree, your life sucks 343 You deserved it 139

3 comments Share

Anonymous · 27 March 2026, 03:00

Things can only get better

Today, I felt so rejected by my wife that I can't help myself but feel like shit. She has bipolar, is on medication, yet she makes me feel so little that emotionally and physically that I've started to feel like a failure. No intimacy, shitty behaviour, complaining all the time. Man, I wish I could end it all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 445 You deserved it 77

4 comments Share

Anonymous · 25 March 2026, 12:00

A bit of an overreaction

Today, my wife, who I thought was my soulmate, admitted that she only went out on our first date because she'd lost a bet, and she'd thought I was a loser. Even though she kept saying that she really did fall in love with me, I left. My heart is just shattered. I'm not going back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 264 You deserved it 602

5 comments Share