miss_taymi

Today, my dad yet again uttered the words "well, that escalated quickly," while watching the news. He uses this godforsaken meme multiple times a day. I lost my shit and told him to just shut up already. He raised an eyebrow and said, "well, that escalated quickly." FML

Romance is definitely dead

Today, I went on a blind date that my friend set up. He greeted me with a winning smile, a belch, and the words, "Nice tits." I'm beginning to lose hope. FML