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Distraction free

By Anonymous - 16/07/2026 15:00 - France - Paris

Today, I bought noise-canceling headphones to block out distractions while working from home. They worked so well that I missed the doorbell, three phone calls, and a fire drill in my building. FML

I agree, your life sucks 241

You deserved it 137

Mythbusters

By Anonymous - 02/07/2026 22:00 - United States - St Louis

Today, I’ve realized the whole “men are more sexual than women” isn’t true. I have ended up in two long-term relationships with two different men who had zero sex drive, stopped any sort of romantic connection/flirting, and then it felt like I just had a roommate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 241

You deserved it 98

Latte

By Latte - 15/09/2025 15:00 - United States - Boston

Today, I ordered my usual at my local coffee shop. The barista asked, “Name for the order?” For some reason, my brain short-circuited and I said, “Latte.” So they called out “Latte” when it was ready, and I had to shame-walk to the counter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 240

You deserved it 220

Mixed signals

By Anonymous - 02/07/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, I worked up the courage to ask someone out after months of debating it. She smiled, said yes, and asked what time. I got so nervous that I gave her the time I start work instead of our reservation. We both showed up to completely different places and spent twenty minutes wondering why the other had ghosted us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 240

You deserved it 312

Oh dear, oh no

By Voters remorse - 01/02/2026 03:00

Today, after working to elect a Democratic governor who campaigned on "affordability" instead of a MAGA nut job, she's immediately signed off on dozens of new taxes and removed mandatory minimum sentencing requirements for violent crimes. This isn't what I voted for! FML

I agree, your life sucks 240

You deserved it 582

Protect the planet

By Anonymous - 23/10/2025 20:00

Today, my partner told me that he will never initiate sex again, all because six months ago I got him worked up then didn’t follow through. I didn’t follow through because I got pissed at him for throwing a cigarette butt into an environmentally sensitive creek. FML

I agree, your life sucks 239

You deserved it 399

Out of tune

By Anonymous - 13/06/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, after I spent 3 months secretly learning guitar so I could surprise everyone at a family barbecue, the moment finally came. I sat down, took a deep breath, and realized I'd practiced every song with a capo I forgot to bring, as well as my tuner. Everything sounded terrible. My uncle asked if I was improvising Free Jazz. FML

I agree, your life sucks 239

You deserved it 197

The Curse

By Anonymous - 11/04/2026 03:00 - United States

Today, it was the third time I've seen an ambulance in front of the grocery store that I like to shop at. The first time someone collapsed at the entrance; the second time an elderly lady had to be wheeled out on a gurney. I'm wondering if the place is cursed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 238

You deserved it 109

Just the tit

By Anonymous - 22/02/2026 12:00

Today, I had to explain to my husband that while trying to figure out how to make coffee on our stupid new machine, I was in fact nude, so when I finally got it to work and steam came hissing out of the nozzle, I got first degree burn on my nipple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 238

You deserved it 362

Stiffed

By Anonymous - 04/12/2025 22:00

Today, I called my usual babysitter, one of the few people who can handle my difficult kids, to ask her to watch them for a night next week. She refused. It turns out my wife has been repeatedly underpaying her and she's fed up with it. So long date nights, I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 238

You deserved it 418

Toast

By [email protected] - 31/07/2026 09:00 - United States - Garden City

Today I watched my 90 year-old father-in-law's friend dip an entire piece of bread into her wine glass, swish it around with her fork, and then eat it. In a restaurant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 238

You deserved it 70

Narrative

By ADHD - 16/12/2025 15:00

Today, I tried explaining a movie plot to a group of friends, only for them to inform me I had described three completely different movies. One said my version actually sounded better. Another asked if I’d hit my head recently. FML

I agree, your life sucks 237

You deserved it 150

Lucky escape

By Anonymous - 27/11/2025 12:00

Today, I went camping with my girlfriend and another couple. We saw a black bear. I shrieked and peed, while the other guy stepped forward and yelled, "Get outta here!" To my surprise, it ran away. My girlfriend is so ashamed of me that she's refusing to share a tent. I'm sleeping in my truck bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 236

You deserved it 469

Lost the plot

By Petra - 18/12/2025 20:00

Today, I joined a conversation about a TV show at work, agreeing enthusiastically. After a few minutes, I realized they were talking about a completely different show with a similar name. I nodded along, trapped, hoping no one asked questions. FML

I agree, your life sucks 236

You deserved it 105

Is he wrong though?

By Impossible - 03/08/2025 12:00 - Poland - Warsaw

Today, a friend who works for the power company said, "Nuclear energy is clean and safe, hydro power is great, but we also need coal and gas, and wind and solar are dogshit." Again, he works for the power company. How does a so-called expert get it all so wrong? FML

I agree, your life sucks 236

You deserved it 554

Product placement

By Anna - 14/11/2025 00:00

Today, half-asleep, I stumbled into the bathroom in the dark. I didn’t notice my boyfriend had yet again left the toilet seat up. I sat down, fell halfway in, screamed, and in my panic flushed the toilet with my phone in my hand. Goodbye, my little Samsung friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 233

You deserved it 356

Is that a threat?

By Excessive Force - 22/02/2026 03:00

Today, my boss, who was in a heated dispute with a difficult employee, called me via our office chat program to deal with him. The program interrupts whatever you do, making it the priority window. I was in a chat with another colleague, making my response that they both saw, "I have many bullets to spare!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 233

You deserved it 160

What secret item did you expect?

By Nathalie - 06/11/2025 20:00

Today, my mom texted me, “Sweetie, I found something weird in your laundry basket.” My mind raced through every possible embarrassing scenario. I called her in panic, and she said, “Why are there 18 single socks?” I’ve never been so relieved to be messy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 233

You deserved it 117

Miscommunication

By Wasted effort - 21/09/2025 15:00

Today, after months of nasty fights, I decided to turn over a new leaf in my relationship. I apologized for my past actions and spent the week trying to make sure her needs were met and that she felt special. Rather than trying to reconnect, she decided I'm "love bombing" her and now won't even look at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 232

You deserved it 304

Life comes at you fast

By Anonymous - 18/09/2025 15:00

Today, I’m 20, pregnant, and getting a divorce. I asked my soon to be ex why he even bothered marrying me in the first place. He said it’s because his parents “made him.” I can’t believe I’m going to be a pregnant divorcee before I’m even able to legally have my first drink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 232

You deserved it 464

Polycule avoided

By Anonymous - 03/05/2026 15:00 - United States - Riverside

Today, I caught my boyfriend cheating again. Not wanting to lose him, I suggested we try opening our relationship and being poly. He flew into a rage and swore I was just trying to think of an excuse to get back at him by screwing a bunch of randos. I can’t win. FML

I agree, your life sucks 232

You deserved it 472

Work ain't for everyone

By Embarrassed - 29/08/2025 22:00 - United States

Today, it was my third day at my new job. It was super hectic; before long, I got so confused and overwhelmed, I had a full-blown emotional breakdown in front of my coworkers. My boss offered sympathy, telling me I could go home and he would never make me work on days like that again, but I still feel pathetic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 230

You deserved it 297

Pure evil

By Anonymous - 03/04/2026 20:00

Today, my daughter admitted that she was the one who left all the used condoms in the back of my ex-husband's car, which led to us getting a horrible divorce because I thought he cheated and didn't believe him. I never suspected her for a minute. FML

I agree, your life sucks 229

You deserved it 499

You're fit but don't you know it

By Anonymous - 10/08/2025 12:00 - Canada

Today, I was running at the gym, feeling like a fitness influencer. I increased the treadmill speed to “sprint” mode. My shoelace got caught in the belt, and I was launched backward into a rack of yoga mats, knocking them over like bowling pins. FML

I agree, your life sucks 229

You deserved it 353

BBFs

By Anonymous - 19/10/2025 15:00

Today, I was hanging with my lesbian friend, who I am secretly in love with. I bought her flowers, took her out to eat, and we held hands all through dinner. We met up with our friends later and she told them what we did, then said, "Isn't she the best friend ever? I'm so glad I have an honorary sister like her." FML

I agree, your life sucks 229

You deserved it 380

Let's call the whole thing off

By Foreshadowing - 10/12/2025 03:00

Today, I told a customer to “Enjoy your food” as I handed him his receipt instead of his meal. He replied, “You too.” We both froze in silence for a few seconds before he slowly took the bag and walked away in shame. FML

I agree, your life sucks 229

You deserved it 128

Confused

By I…… - 10/12/2025 20:00

Today, I ran into someone at a party I thought was a coworker and started talking to them about the company we work for. He listened to me for a bit, then said, “I think you think I’m someone else.” I apologized to this total stranger, walked away, and spent the rest of the party avoiding him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 228

You deserved it 170

Goo

By Anonymous - 23/07/2026 22:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I went on a date and ended up back at her place. She gave me head in the front hall before we started moving to her bedroom. That’s when her dad, asleep on the sofa, woke up. She had no idea why he was there but she still had my stuff dripping down her chin, and he definitely noticed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 228

You deserved it 111

What are you up to?

By Anonymous - 21/03/2026 22:00

Today, I went through my boyfriend’s chat with his best friend and saw porn videos. We've been together for four years and I have never seen him send me any porn videos like that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 227

You deserved it 242

Mixed messages

By Anonymous - 16/03/2026 22:00

Today, I heard my downstairs neighbor pounding on her roof/my floor. I thought she was being a Karen and wanting me to be quiet, even though I wasn’t doing anything. I stomped back defiantly to make a point. Turns out she was having an asthma attack and was asking for help. Oops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 227

You deserved it 329

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The Top

Today, I woke up with a nasty cough. My mother gave me cough syrup for it. After about 30 minutes, I was dizzy, nauseous, and high as a fucking kite. Turns out the cough syrup reacts badly with my prescription medications, making me even sicker than I already was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 687

You deserved it 1 178

Today, I went to the airport with my mom, who requested a wheelchair for me, since I have a broken leg. I'm 24. Embarrassed, I insisted I push myself around, instead of an airline assistant doing it. A few seconds later, I crash into the same airline assistant, who then falls back into my lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 134

You deserved it 29 834

Today, I finally discovered the reason my front room smelt funny. My dog, thinking the Christmas tree was real, has been peeing on it for the past two weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 231

You deserved it 5 155

Today, my husband gave our three-year-old son a lesson on life and death. He did this by slaughtering our pet chicken for dinner in front of him. My son has been crying for hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 664

You deserved it 502

Today, it’s been a week since my dad has decided I’m only allowed to sleep with my door open. Guess how long it’s been since I’ve slept. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 049

You deserved it 132

Today, I was feeling pretty cute in a black dress. Apparently, that makes me "emo" and an "online dater". FML

I agree, your life sucks 796

You deserved it 130