To the moon!

By juggalo2 - 03/01/2026 09:00

Today, I told my wife I was getting nervous about the surge in silver prices, and I wanted to sell some of our holdings. She told me not to be a "paper-handsing little bitch." FML

agreeclassic 94

vote type 1 295

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Similar FMLs

Chill out

By Bruce - 01/12/2022 18:00

Today, I had to warn my wife not to kill her insane mother. I was serious. FML

agreeclassic 829

vote type 1 97

Antiques Roadshow

By Anonymous - 17/10/2024 21:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I got home and found my kids playing with my coin collection. My wife told me to stop being grouchy because it’s not like they’re silver and gold. No, but they were all mint condition, some of them very rare, and every scratch the kids just put on them has halved their value or worse. FML

agreeclassic 588

vote type 1 104

By gutted - 07/05/2012 02:13 - United Kingdom

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She promptly had a panic attack and screamed, "No!" FML

agreeclassic 31 989

vote type 1 2 891

By Ilostsomuch - 04/01/2012 18:30 - United States

Today, I came home to find that my mother had sold all my valuable collector coins for cheap at a local shady pawn shop to buy herself a TV. The coins in question were worth enough to start a business. FML

agreeclassic 47 552

vote type 1 3 066

PMS

By unappreciated husband - 28/03/2014 21:43 - United States - Pullman

Today, my wife got her period. Every single time, she ends up asking me to go buy her some Midol after a few days of trying to tough it out, so I decided to buy her some ahead of time. She reacted by yelling at me for treating her like a child and implying that she couldn't go buy it herself. FML

agreeclassic 47 054

vote type 1 5 111

Promising

By Anonymous - 14/10/2022 10:00

Today, my wife of 12 years told me she would be more peaceful if I just killed myself. I argued that I’m not going to, but she assured me that I would. It’s just ‘when’ that’s in question. FML

agreeclassic 1 209

vote type 1 123

What did I say, Roy?

By Peter - 30/06/2021 18:01

Today, my wife said I was being difficult and unreasonable, and called my mother to talk to me about my behaviour. What did I do, you ask? I dared to share my opinion on something I happen to feel strongly about, instead of just mindlessly agreeing with her opinion like I have for the past 22 years. FML

agreeclassic 1 209

vote type 1 291

Pushover

By Anonymous - 23/10/2021 13:59 - Australia

Today, my wife always wants to spend on big items, like a new pool or home renovations; I want to save for our future. At 45 years of age, we are in heavy debt and I have no other assets as a backup. I should have stood up to her from the beginning. FML

agreeclassic 907

vote type 1 626

Compassionate

By Anonymous - 25/01/2021 12:01 - Australia - Carnegie

Today, I tried to speak to my wife about my feelings for this coming year, family and work. I thought it wouldn't be a problem as I regularly listen and support her with her feelings, emotional issues, anxiety, depression, etc. She shut me down in 30 seconds and said to stop acting like my mother and being so stupid. FML

agreeclassic 1 362

vote type 1 119

By Anonymous - 15/11/2012 19:47 - Ireland

Today, I had to stand next to my wife at the supermarket, beet-red and pretending not to exist; about half an hour into our shopping, she completely lost her shit at the advertising on the loudspeaker, turned to another patron, and screamed into his face to shut the fuck up. FML

agreeclassic 21 674

vote type 1 2 488

TOP COMMENTS

No comments yet.

Comments

No comments yet.

VDM sur Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Top

Today, my boss yelled at me for ignoring emails on my day off. Our emails are only accessible from work desktops, so I’d have had to be at my desk to answer it, which I had to explain to him 3 times before he understood. This is what happens when CEO’s promote their nephews to middle management. FML

agreeclassic 661

vote type 1 70

Today, I went to an amusement park with my family. I was the only one who put on sunblock, and the only one who got a sunburn. FML

agreeclassic 35 710

vote type 1 3 952

Today, my roommate decided to fry some bacon. After finishing, he thought it would be easy to clean up if he just tossed the panful of grease out the second story window. Guess where I was standing at the time? FML

agreeclassic 40 161

vote type 1 2 560

Today, I'm not going to our family Christmas party due to events last year that caused me to cut off contact with one of my sisters. My entire family is now making me out to be the villain to my 8 year-old, and trying to manipulate my decision with guilt trips. They have reduced me to tears 12 days in a row. FML

agreeclassic 938

vote type 1 153

Today, as I was driving to work, I witnessed a kid apparently getting jumped. Being a good citizen, I got out and started yelling at them. I ended up alongside the kid in the hospital. FML

agreeclassic 39 899

vote type 1 4 639

Today, my husband sat me down to tell me he’s filing for divorce as he’s fallen out of love with me and loves my 19 year-old daughter (his step-daughter). Furthermore, I’m off the lease when it expires next month so they can live together. We have a 2 month-old son. He replied, “OK, and? I’ll pay child support.” FML

agreeclassic 913

vote type 1 119