Today, my recent ex-boyfriend stopped by my house with a well-dressed man. He reached into his pocket and handed me records that "prove" he never cheated on me. Oh, and the man next to him? His lawyer, who gave me a summons to court over payment for the items I smashed when I dumped him. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after two months of being broken up, and my ex still insisting she hadn't been cheating on me, I declared via text my intention to burn the rest of her stuff in the yard. This resulted in the guy she "hadn't been cheating on me with" kicking in my door. FML
Today, a man came up to me and punched me in the face. He turned out to be the guy my ex-girlfriend cheated on me with. Apparently, she told him we broke up because I used to beat her. FML
Today, I found out the person who's been stalking and harassing me online was actually my now ex-boyfriend. He only confessed as I finally picked up the phone to report it to the police. He basically said he wanted me to turn to him for comfort and protection, so he could "feel like a man". FML
Today, I got a call from my boyfriend. He was at the police station for breaking into a model home to hook up with the girl he's been cheating on me with for the past four months. I was his one phone call. He was expecting me to bail him out. FML
Today, my boyfriend dumped me by throwing my stuff out of his place, and accusing me of cheating while yelling, "Cheater, cheater! Pumpkin eater!" When I tried explaining that I have no clue what he's talking about, he started exclaiming, "Liar, liar! Pants on fire!" FML
Today, my boyfriend of one year broke up with me. He's been in jail for the last four months. I paid for his very expensive lawyer. FML
Today, I found out my ex bought a digital camera, an iPod, and a large flat-screen TV, all purchased with the alimony I'm paying him. FML
Today, I got a call from the police that my house had been burglarized, but an off-duty cop caught the criminal. I pull up to see my detained, psycho ex-boyfriend sheepishly grinning at me. He had three of my lace panties and two of my bras, claiming it was "all for memories' sake". FML
Today, my boyfriend came home with three of his best friends and broke up with me in front of them. Then, when I asked if we could talk privately, he filmed it for "documentation." FML
Today, I gathered all the evidence I needed to prove that my fiancé has been cheating on me. When I showed it to him, he looked at it, then looked me right in the eye and said, “So you did all this just to learn their names, cry, and stay with me anyway?” Sadly, he’s right. FML
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Top comments
bobsanction 18
That's what you get for breaking shit.
Glowworm56 27
I don't know why, but I love how the ex boyfriend brought the lawyer with him to the OP's house.
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Comments (58)
Talis99 26
I think it's pretty clear you deserve it.
FenderM 5
Abuser logic. Accuse someone of something terrible in order to control their behavior, destroy their stuff, play the injured party. OP, if this is the worst you pay for abusing someone (and destroying property is abuse), consider yourself incredibly lucky. I am considering the ex lucky for getting out.
Bluepies 24
This is the strongest YDI I've seen on this site.
redlizzybeth 25
Given that he didn't have the affair as he was accused of, I can imagine that he was pretty mad. I don't know what was destroyed but I hope you can cover the damage. This is the purpose of the legal system. Even if you had concrete evidence that he cheated and it had caused damages to you ( an example would be STD's), you are still not allowed to destroy property. So even if you had been right about the cheating, you would still be wrong about the destruction. I have known several people who have hired a lawyer over things such as this because it exceeded small claims court allowance.
Thor1012 28
Break his things? you gotta pay.... whether he cheated or not.
MitiMiki 16
Sorry, OP, YDI. Even if he did cheat on you, destruction of private property is a crime. Infidelity does not justify criminal behavior.
Taurus_ChicKa 37
What exactly did you break? If it was a DVD/game, that's hardly worth getting a lawyer over. Now something big, like a TV, car, or even game console? That's pretty bad. I get that you're angry, but come on. If you must smash something, make it something that isn't worth much. But I am curious as to how he has records that prove he never cheated on you. What kind of records are they, and who keeps such a thing?
Jebodeiasque 7
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Maybe don't be a psychotic bitch?
Catdragon 40
you shouldn't have broken his stuff even if he did cheat, but that doesn't excuse him cheating.
Dear_Karma 27
Good for him. You shouldn't have smashed his stuff. If it was the other way around he would have been in shit for violence so why should you het away with it?