Today, I returned to work after a week off due to severe food poisoning, after which I ended up in the ED. I was given a warning for causing an inconvenience to everyone, and next time I'm going to be sick, I should give 3 days notice. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was fired from the restaurant I work at because I missed my shift. I missed it because I was in the hospital for food poisoning from the meal I ate at work last night. FML
Today, I was on holiday over the Christmas period and ended up with food poisoning. I spent most of the time on the toilet. I think I’ll stay home next time. FML
Today, despite having a stomach bug, I went into work, as my boss is overseas and had warned me not to take any sick leave until she returned. After 4 hours and vomiting twice, I left. She found out and sent me an email bitching me out for coming in sick. FML
Today, I have food poisoning. My boss told me that if I didn't come into work, I'd be fired. Not 30 minutes after sitting down, I sneezed and shat my pants. My boss still won't let me leave. FML
Today, after a week of staying in at night and fighting off a persistent cold, I was finally feeling well again, so I decided to go to my boyfriend's work BBQ. I got food poisoning. FML
Today, I joked with my boss about calling in sick to work tomorrow with food poisoning to avoid taking the Sunday shift. Tonight, I'm sitting on the toilet bowl in agonizing pain with combination diarrhea and vomiting. My shift starts in 3 hours. FML
Today, it's been 2 days since I got over having the flu for over a week, missing work the whole time. I just got food poisoning. FML
Today, I took my first holiday from work in over 6 months as it was my birthday. Today was also the day I woke up and vomited violently for 10 straight hours as a result of food poisoning. FML
Today, I came home from a four month stay in Africa, where I managed to avoid suffering any serious illness. Some hours after my first meal back at home, I got food poisoning. FML
Today, I got food poisoning from a restaurant that I had chosen for our company party. Everyone who went blamed me for their predicament. I also had to run to the toilet every ten minutes while they were all mad at me. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
alex_jaguara 33
You can pull that off: "Oh, I think I'm gonna be sick ' blergh'!"
bl3ur0z3 17
Yea, I had a boss tell me I needed to give 30 days advance notice for bereavement. Let your boss know you plan to have the flu sometime next week. When it doesn't happen, make sure he rewards you for your commitment to your team.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (4)
alex_jaguara 33
You can pull that off: "Oh, I think I'm gonna be sick ' blergh'!"
RichardPencil 32
ED? I guess food poisoning could cause Erectile Dysfunction (ED), but why tell us? Plus, you're female. Do we really need to know that your nipples don't get hard? Just rub some Viagra on them, I guess.
B00K_L0V3R93 31
ED stands for Emergency Department. They were in the hospital. I honestly can’t tell if are trying to be funny (which is wasn’t) or just wilfully ignorant and can’t read contextual clues.
timinator5000 28
Have you Never seen his comments? You'll eventually see he is Amazing with sarcasm. I didn't know what it stood for and thought erectile disfunction too since I've never heard it called that in my life. I am in America so I'm guessing this wasn't in the USA.
RichardPencil 32
We call it ER here (emergency room). It was hilarious.
s_ve 7
Relax cranky
bl3ur0z3 17
Yea, I had a boss tell me I needed to give 30 days advance notice for bereavement. Let your boss know you plan to have the flu sometime next week. When it doesn't happen, make sure he rewards you for your commitment to your team.