Today, I went to get food. I was late so my friend ordered for me. I took a few bites and all of a sudden it got hard to breathe. I realized it was a blueberry muffin, and I'm deathly allergic to blueberries. I looked at my friend, and she was laughing, saying she wanted to see if it was true. I just got out of the hospital. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up hungover and went to the kitchen for some food. I saw what I thought was a blueberry muffin. Halfway through eating it, I realized I couldn’t taste any blueberries, so I tried another one. I then remembered my dad telling me to throw out any old food we had. It was mould. FML
Today, to make a good impression, I brought in homemade blueberry muffins for my newish coworkers. Everyone loved them, up until the guy with a nut allergy had to be rushed to the hospital. Turns out my almond milk wasn’t as "nut-free" as I thought. Welcome to the team! FML
Today, my coworker brought chocolate muffins to work for everyone. This would have been really nice if they hadn't tasted like rotten blueberry muffins spray-painted brown. I reflexively gagged after taking a bite and coughed up a brown mush in front of her. FML
Today, I was eating a mystery flavored candy and I had an allergic reaction. Not only did I have to go to the hospital because my throat swelled up, but I still don't know what I'm allergic to. FML
Today, I had to go to the ER because of a terrible allergic reaction I had to the cookies my "friend" made for me. She assured me several times that there were no nuts in them. Turns out, she put nuts in them on purpose, to see whether or not I was really allergic. FML
Today, I choked on a gummy bear and ended up in the emergency room. The first thing the doctor said to me was, "Well, that must have been 'beary' uncomfortable." The entire room burst into laughter. FML
Today, I went to the gym to run. I ended up at the hospital because i went into anaphylactic shock. Apparently I'm allergic to exercise now. FML
Today, there was a big cake at the office. I thought it was funny to pretend to push the cute girl in the office into it. She laughed, but then lost her balance and fell forward. Everyone saw. Turns out she’s allergic to coconut, even just the shavings on a cake, and had to go to the hospital. FML
Today, I ended up in the hospital by accidentally eating poisonous berries, from a plant that I've known since childhood to be poisonous, which I also recognized as belonging to the nightshade family. I still don’t understand what made them look tasty. Brain fart of the century, I guess. FML
Today, I experienced the most intense pain I have ever had in my life. I was eating blueberries when my sister made a comment which sent me into hysterics. The force of having a bullet-like berry violently shoot out your nostril is more painful than it sounds. FML
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Top comments
Gwyndion 9
I don't get you said your "friend" did that. Anybody who pulls something like that and almost murders you because he believes you're a liar doesn't deserve to be called a friend.
SelecaoIX 3
You should stab her and then tell her that you heard it would kill her and you wanted to see if it was true.
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Comments (306)
ohmandapants 17
Do you not look at what you eat before you eat it? See, blueberries are blue. Chocolate is brown. You can usually tell a blueberry muffin from a chocolate one just by looking at it, so i doubt this is true. Also, you only realized after a few bites? Wtf kay i get that you probably don't know what a blueberry tastes like, but COME ON. And no friend in their right mind would do that. And laugh about it. This is fake. Please try to be a bit more convincing the next time you write a fake FML. You have wasted my time.
CFR 0
Some friend.
padlarf 14
Get her arrested for attempted manslaughter.
buffalo_9 0
omg thats horrible!
tangerine_12 0
how did you NOT know it was a blueberry muffin? anyone can pretty much tell that there are blueberries in a muffin. soo...FYL for having a crappy "friend" and YDI for not noticing big blueberries in a muffin.
Acidwash1987 0
152, they have those muffins with the filling in them, like doughnuts but muffins....You should severely injure this "friend". kick her right in the box.
Zoa_fml 0
You're allergic to blueberry muffins?
FoundManyLemons 0
Press charges.
nanoflacka 0
Sue her! For the medical bills
Hellsno 0
Uhh, your friend's a bitch