Today, I finished my shopping at Costco, and realized I'd forgotten where I had parked. After scouring the parking lot for 20 minutes, I called the police and filed a report for a stolen vehicle. I then remembered I had bought a new car yesterday and parked it right next to the entrance. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I couldn't find my car in a mall parking lot. After 30 minutes of searching, I reported it stolen to the mall security. It turns out that I'd parked it on the opposite side of the mall. Security escorted me to my car, all while giving me pitiful looks. FML
Today, my car was stolen from my driveway. I reported it to the police, the insurance company, and my neighbors, and begged for help via social media. As I walked to catch a bus, I saw my car parked outside my school. I forgot I left it there last night. FML
Today, I finally found a parking space directly outside my apartment after driving around for 20 minutes. I celebrated, parked, and walked upstairs. Ten minutes later, I realized I'd left my car running with the keys still inside. FML
Today, I took the bus after work. When I got to the remote parking lot, I realized my car had been stolen so I called the police to report it. When they came to take a statement and asked me when was the last time I saw my car was, I replied, “This morning, when I drove it to wo… Oh.” FML
Today, I borrowed a roommate's car to get groceries. I came out to find the car stolen. I called the cops, and the responding officer took the info and drove me home to give the roomie the bad news in person. 15 minutes later, they found the car. I'd parked it on the opposite side of the lot. FML
Today, I thought my car had been stolen because I couldn’t for the life of me find it in the office car park. I panicked and called the cops, only to remember I had taken my bike to work. FML
Today, I found an empty parking space in a crowded parking lot. When I came back later, a lady and a cop were standing by my car. Her car used to be parked there and got stolen. They think I'm involved. FML
Today, my boss reported to the police that a suspicious car has been parked outside the store late at night. I walked outside and my car was gone. He had my car towed. FML
Today, I was leaving my job at a huge mall. I couldn't find my car anywhere, so I panicked and flagged a security officer. I cried while he drove me around for miles in the endless parking lot. Then, suddenly, I remembered. My friend had dropped me off in the morning. FML
Today, I woke up at 7 am to take my last final. When I got to the parking lot, I realized my car was missing. After speaking to the police for 3 hours, I called my girlfriend to let her know what happened. She then told me I had parked on the street the night before. So much for the 8 am final. FML
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Top comments
doubledee93 6
guess someone shouldve had their v8
airforce987 20
Strange. When I get a new car, I always park it so far in the back that no one would ever park near it.
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Comments (158)
DeadxManxWalking 27
So I'm guessing you filed for the wrong car?
DocBastard 40
That actually wasn't even your car. Someone stole your new car and replaced it with an exact replica.
ManInTheMachine 20
Perdix strikes again!
sarahlouise0506 10
Perdix?
ManInTheMachine 20
Referring to another FML where a guy's stuff was stolen. Under that one, perdix said something along the lines of "I steal people's stuff and replace it with exact replicas." I didn't expect many to get it.
Enslaved 38
I believe Machine is referring to a past FML comment that perdix made that seems similar to the one the DocBastard just made. --Phew! My mind is spinning! Edit: you beat me to the explanation. Glad I was correct.:P
tamgibbo 5
You putz....lol
callous 2
The cops should have arrested you.
Enslaved 38
Warning: A belly full of free samples can cause memory loss.
ebonyirony 29
28- I love Costco just for their samples. Like I get full meals there.
priceyfml 7
I remember going to trader joes for free samples :)
tne201992 12
This comment reminds me on that episode of Family Guy when Peter disguised himself, so he have more free samples
jovizzle 8
**** YOU SHORT TERM MEMORY.
dog1999 2
Usually when I buy a new car I don't forget about it the next day.
aperfectxdeath 3
I know, buying a new car isn't exactly a small decision. I don't see how someone could forget they bought a new car. Usually it goes like "hey guys you seen my new car?"
dog1999 2
That's my thoughts exactly
laxforevrr 0
rough op but how could you not remember if it was in front of costco?
Rainbowjumper0 12
YDI but at the same time, I feel your pain with the parking. Parking at Costco is a pain in the ass
soyeah_whatsup 4
You would think getting a new car would be a major enough event to remember.