anonymous
This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff
San Francisco, United States
Whatever floats your boat
Today, I went on a first date. I didn't know that licking my neck was on the agenda. FML
Top comments
turtlemanz 8
That sounds like a tasty relationship
MeanBeagle 22
cannibalism .... only leaves a funny taste when you're eating a clown
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (71)
tony1891 22
wonder what's next on the agenda?
nevermindthemind 18
Careful OP he might be a vampire!!
lazyslumber 18
This FML needs more info, I agree it's weird but the extent depends on whether it was a blind date or OP's date was a close friend whom OP decided to date.
foxwasalamb 24
really? its that "gross" and "nasty" to lick someones neck? forreal? their neck is probably cleaner than their mouth and a helluva lot cleaner than genitals. people give hickies and people kiss their partners neck. i dint see why its gross
TaylorWhiteGirl 15
Because it's the FIRST date...
rocker_chick23 27
There is a difference between your partner giving you a hickey and a stranger licking your neck during the first date
orbit 22
Well I'm guessing the person didn't just jump across a table and lick op. We need more context, what was happening before the lick?
dabomb0513 10
Probs because it's the first date
Ichiya 29
Food crumbs on her neck. Never let food go to waste!
turtlefreak32 17
OP here! Not much you can put into less than 300 characters. It was a blind date, and I can guarantee that there won't be a second date. He wouldn't respect my boundaries, and I'm not okay with that. Like I told him, I'm slower than a turtle in molasses.
xleanne_aLly 23
Hey OP, I love turtles too. I'm going to use that some time okay. "I'm slower than a turtle in the molasses." As for the guy. On the positive side, you found out he's not right for you on the first date!
turtlefreak32 17
Totally okay with that haha. Tar is a good one too.
DenverTyrrell 13
Eww how did it get to that part of the date?! And why did you let him if you didn't like it feel sorry for you
turtlefreak32 17
I'm generally a quiet person, and don't like hurting people. Also, I was trying to pay attention to the movie haha. I didn't notice he was that close until he actually did it. I didn't let him kiss me, either. He was fairly handsy.
worldclassrager 41
That's a bit too early I would have to say...so a second date or not?
prettyinpinkxoxo 9
That's happened to me before too ...it feels weird...:/
marcranger 29
If I'd been you, OP, the other FML that would be working its way through moderation would've said, "Today, I went on a first date. My testicles have been smashed flatter than a pancake, and I got stuck with the bill. FML." I don't blame you if you decide to stick to the single life after this.
Hiimhaileypotter 53
Because of one creep, you'd understand if they stayed single the REST of their entire life? Wow.
SuperMew 22
Reminds me of a friend I had in middle school. She got a boyfriend that wouldn't kiss her, just licked her neck and face. Sounds like he grew up and is still romancing girls.