Today, a girl told me, "You're so cute, like a monkey." I seriously don't know if it's a compliment or if I'm being insulted. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was taking a shower with my girlfriend when she 'complimented' me by saying, "You’re cute, like a rat." FML
Today, a little girl came up to me and told me I looked like a foot. Thanks a bunch, darling. FML
Today, I took my daughter on her first visit to the zoo. While we were watching the lemurs, some kid thought it would be funny to start shouting "MONKEY CUNTS" at them at the top of his voice. Now my daughter refuses to stop repeating the same phrase. FML
Today, I was trying to compliment a colleague on her new hairstyle. I said, "I love how you did your hair today, it makes you look so mature!" She didn't take it as a compliment. FML
Today, a coworker informed me that she thinks I may be descended from a race of goblins, because of my squat stature, ugly face and hairy arms. She was being completely serious. FML
Today, a girl I work with was talking to me in an Eeyore voice. I'm not sure if it's because she's sad and pathetic, or if she thinks I'm sad and pathetic. FML
Today, I was punched in the balls by a monkey. FML
Today, I tried to compliment a colleague on her new hairstyle. I said, “You look different today!” She took it as an insult, thinking I meant she looked worse. She hasn’t spoken to me since. FML
Today, a cute boy told me I looked like a celebrity. Flattered, I asked who I resembled. He responded by saying that I looked exactly like Ugly Betty. He was serious. FML
Today, at the Y, someone told me I had a cute ass. I liked that until I realized: a) a woman said it; b) I'm a woman; c) I'm straight; d) it's my first compliment in 2 years even though I'm 25; and e) I'm so in need of positive attention I ran after this woman to ask for a date. Me desperate much? FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 32
It depends on how she said it. My wife and girlfriend coincidentally both call me "********" but in an endearing way.
RichardPencil 32
You must be new here.
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Comments (6)
RichardPencil 32
It depends on how she said it. My wife and girlfriend coincidentally both call me "********" but in an endearing way.
zedkazmee 11
Why do you have a wife and a gf, coincidentally?
Ambrily 27
He's the local troll. Hilarious most of the times, way too much many others, straight up mean or (willingly) ignorant on occasions. You'll learn to love him - or at least tolerate him.
RichardPencil 32
You must be new here.
cjathebest 5
lol is she from new Orleans
Brian G 3
It's not an insult; but it IS a way for her to tell you that she's not interested in dating you. It's pretty much the same thing as a girl telling you that 'you're cute... like a puppy'. Girls don't date puppies or monkeys.