Today, my parents staged a family intervention and gave me the grandest bollocking I've ever experienced in all my 22 years of life. They did this because my sister showed them a photo of me jokingly posing with three bottles of Bud Light at a party. Apparently, I'm an alcoholic in denial. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, at dinner, I accidentally let it slip that I'd taken a small sip of alcohol a few years ago and hated it. My extremely strict parents are now trying to get me into rehab. FML
Today, my mom and I staged an intervention for my alcoholic dad. Within minutes he'd turned everything around on us, claiming we're in no position to judge him for drinking since we use "too much water" when we shower. Apparently that's on the same level as being an abusive alcoholic. FML
Today, I found out that my sister's kids refer to me as their 'Drunkle'. I guess I have to admit to myself that I'm an alcoholic. FML
Today, on my 30th birthday, my mom, aunt, and sister staged an intervention instead of throwing a party. Apparently I’m “ruining my life” by being 300lbs and being "single for 5 years" and I need to “get my act together.” They treated me like I’m some sort of criminal and reduced me to tears. FML
Today, my parents tried to stage an intervention for me. Drugs? No. Alcohol? Nope. Gambling? Nah ah. They wanted to intervene on behalf of my soul since I decided I no longer believe in their religion. I had to threaten to call the cops when the escalated to attempt a forced exorcism on me. FML
Today, my mom took me to an AA meeting because she said I needed help. I have never tried alcohol in my life, and told them this. I was then harangued by the "instructor" because apparently one of the signs of alcoholism is denial. FML
Today, my friends staged an intervention. I'm not on drugs, I'm not an alcoholic, and I own my own house. My car is paid for and my job pays well. Apparently, I need an intervention because my life is not where they want it to be, which involves me being married with children. FML
Today, my ten year-old son realized something. Beer is alcohol. People who drink a lot of alcohol are alcoholics. Therefore, I'm an alcoholic for drinking beer with dinner. He told everyone at his conservative private school and they tried to have an intervention. They pray for me every day. FML
Today, my mum got upset with me for having my first hangover ever after being of legal drinking age for over 6 years. She is a closet alcoholic in denial who hides red wine bottles around the house. FML
Today, my mother woke me up by putting a beer on my face. After 15 minutes of her telling me to "just take a sip" and me rejecting it, I finally did just to shut her up. She then yelled at me for giving in to "peer pressure". FML
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Top comments
pinecone1414 6
Well, better than a true alcoholic
saIty 17
If only you posed with 6 beers on your belly. You could have argued that you wanted to create a six pack.
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Comments (196)
Keyman1212 14
Rehab is for quitters. Who wants to be a quitter? Remind them of that.
TylerRossmann 0
Hahah:p
blackheart24 10
Haha that's awesome!
hombrepollo 0
Three bud lights! Someone call the wambulance!!!!!!!!
RMRaidersNumbah3 0
to late .
m0tl3ycru3 0
Too bad you have bad grammer...
illmatic2 16
grammar* Nice try, dumbass.
JadedJarOfHearts 3
I love when people TRY to beak people. And it doesn't work. :)
False_Stupidity 42
Besides, it's bad spelling in this case.
brendanb33 5
They were probably mad you were only holding 3 beers, rookie lol
soccerluva19 0
Just fess up to it....
NEEPLES 7
Just know that you have a family that cares. Most families wouldnt even bother.
web124 6
Family interventions are fun and entertaining!
Okayitwasme 0
Sounds like either your sister needs payback or she really cares about you and you should be grateful.
Red_Wing_Nut44 14
You're parents are freaking out over nothing. You're over 21, and most people I party with down 3 or 4 beers at a party. Simply put, it's time to move. Well, maybe not at 22 but still...
ikickgingers 15
Light weights.
ohmandapants 17
You make it sound like it's a lot... 3-4 beers, you guys sure know how to paartaayyy wooooo
lilvic56 5
That's beginners stuff, drink apple juice like a man.
False_Stupidity 42
**** beer, I've been known to down 12+ shots of overproof rum and still be standing. That at least would make it worth calling me an alcoholic
Red_Wing_Nut44 14
Ya well most of us gotta drive home. Since we don't wanna kill anyone we try not to get totdaly freaking drunk off our asses.
ikickgingers 15
The rest of the world has a designated driver... Shhh or we take a... Cab
dontpanic_fml 32
mmk 181...I've never been to a party where EVERYONE had to drive home and thus NOBODY drank much
ohmandapants 17
I had a friend like your parents. Some people are so stupid and over-dramatic. It's 3 beers. Tell them to chill the **** out.