Today, just like at every gynecologist's appointment in the last 5 years, I had to yet again explain that no, I'm not a virgin at 27 because I'm waiting till marriage, I'm just a loser that no-one wants to sleep with. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, when my doctor told me I had symptoms of an STD, I had to repeatedly try to convince her I'm a 28-year-old virgin. Even as I left she still didn't believe me. FML
Today, my constant bragging to friends caught up with me, and everyone believes I'm a swinger. Because of this, no girl wants to go out with me, in case they become just another notch under my belt. The truth is, I'm still a virgin. FML
Today, someone in class was making a point about premarital intercourse - "90% of teen virgins aren't saving it for marriage, they just can't get any." Another classmate pointed me out specifically. FML
Today, my 9 year old niece asked me if I was a virgin. I told her, "Yes, I'm saving myself until marriage". She replied, "That's a load of bullshit, you just can't get a guy!" Sadly, she's right. FML
Today, I'm nearly 30 years-old, and not only am I still a virgin, I've never even had my first kiss. FML
Today, I had the crap beaten out of me by a woman in the street, who accused me of sleeping with her husband. I still don't know who she or her husband are, and I'm still a virgin. FML
Today, my best friend told me that she was a virgin again because she hadn't had sex in 6 months. She's 19 and actually believes it. FML
Today, I've reached the age as a sexless loser where my family no longer tells me to find a "single lady" but rather a "single mother". Thanks for reminding me everyone else had fun in their twenties. FML
Today, I had my wisdom teeth taken out. I vaguely remember telling the doctor that I'm a virgin. Several times. FML
Today, I got a letter stating that now that I'm in my mid-twenties, I need to start getting cervical exams. The only people interested in getting anywhere near my vagina are doctors. FML
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Top comments
Taylor Caldwell 10
That’s seems inappropriate that a doctor is asking you about your reasons for abstinence?? Sure they need to know if you are or aren’t sexually active but what is willing that outcome is your business.
rotflqtms_ 21
I may tell people I'm waiting until marriage... but if I'm honest with myself...I'm just scared...
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Comments (14)
meisiemeisie 8
Hun, unless you have some kind of reproductive condition, you don't need to visit a gyno or get a pap until you start having sex. They should tell you this themselves, but maybe they just want the business.