Today, my boss called me into his office. I thought I was getting promoted because my sales had been really high lately. My boss shut his door behind me and asked me if I could comb his hair with a lice comb to get rid of his lice. I had to do it to keep my job. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got head lice, so I went to a store to buy medicated shampoo. When checking out the cashier saw my shampoo and asked me to leave immediately to protect the other customers. He didn't let me buy the shampoo. FML
Today, at my retail job, I tried on one of our hats. My co-worker told me I shouldn't because I could get lice. I laughed it off and told her I didn't believe her. Man, do I believe her now. FML
Today, my boss held his polo shirt one inch from my nose and asked me to smell it. He said that he was going into one of our tenants' apartment and wanted to smell him before and after so I could judge said apartment's cleanliness. FML
Today, I was tutoring kids at an elementary school. One kid messed up my hair. I said, "Why'd you do that??" He said, "I have lice, now you have lice too!" FML
Today, my boss called me over to his office; he wanted me to fire four hardworking employees. One of them was the girl I was going to ask out. FML
Today, a customer came in to the Pizza store where I work and complained that the food they had purchased had a strand of black hair in it. After some deliberation, my boss decided to fire me. He is the only staff member there with black hair. I shaved my hair 2 weeks ago. FML
Today, my boss told me to cut my long hair. After coming back to work with a clean cut hairstyle, he apparently thought I was the new guy, and said I was going to be trained by "The long-haired girly-looking idiot." FML
Today, a co-worker asked me if I had a comb he could borrow. I'm bald. FML
Today, I got a call from my younger brother's school to pick him up immediately. He had a test today, but he had the brilliant idea that by telling everyone he had head lice, he could go home. I had to leave work to pick him up, and now I have to take him to a doctor so they can see if he can go back. FML
Today, my boss called me into his office. I've been working hard doing extra work so I can get promoted. He called me in to tell me I'm to reliable in my current position, so I won't be moving up. FML
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Top comments
deadlyill 0
just so you know that is illegal for some one in power to make you do something such as that
drybamboo 0
His name's Michael Scott, isn't it.
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Comments (72)
Jonny_fml 0
On the bright side, atleast he think's you're a trusted employee.
PointedRound 0
**** that shit.
interventions 1
people are disgusting :(
Kzee 0
I hope you asked for a raise after that.
derriick 0
hahaa, thats amazing... perfect time to bring up a raise.
0 3
UGHH You probably caught it! FML! PROTIP: You can't get rid of lice with a comb!
nodbor 11
next week it'll be get in here and help me with these crabs
zandar 0
you really need to stop dancing and get a real job!
beardsnbicycles7 0
That iz eleegul.
sam1298 0
i literally lol'd at #3