TW: Scampi
Today, I’m so heartbroken I can’t even finish leftover Chicken Scampi without bursting into tears. FML
Today, I’m so heartbroken I can’t even finish leftover Chicken Scampi without bursting into tears. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I lovingly simmered a chicken carcass, vegetables and spices to make soup. Two hours it took. After all that, I mindlessly strained out the chicken bones and let the soup pour straight down the sink. FML
Today, tears and 3 hours on the toilet have made me reevaluate my desire for new culinary experiences. FML
Today, I ate out, even though I was tired. When my main course arrived, I realised I had sent both my forks away with the starter plate. Rather than say anything, I ate dinner with two knives. FML
Today, I over-boiled some potatoes. I was having a bad day and this tipped me over the edge. I burst into tears and threw the potatoes all over my kitchen. I then stomped on the piping hot potatoes. The bottoms of my feet are blistered and still feel like they’re burning. FML
Today, I sliced my finger on a frozen chicken cutlet. FML
Today, my brain deleted the words "chicken tenders" mid-shift. I started falling apart and hysterically crying. The cook could see that I was falling apart, jumped in to help. I pulled my s*** together to help the next customer who saw it all happen. They all now think I'm mentally ill, but it was so scary I couldn't talk for whole moment. FML
Today, while at the drive-thru at Sonic, they told me they were out of mozzarella sticks. I shed actual tears. I’m not even pregnant. FML
Today, my beloved pet chicken ran away from home. I got so distraught that my dad offered to buy me dinner. Specifically, KFC. FML
Today, if I’m not at work, I’m spending my time racing back and forth between sheer relief that I’m no longer married to my ex-husband and that I’ve got my freedom and independence back, and bursting into tears because the slightest thing reminds me of him, and I miss the awful twat. FML
Today, right after preparing a gourmet plate of dry-aged steak with freshly cooked mashed potatoes, I stepped on my son's Lego and dropped my plate. I stood there for 5 minutes, crying. FML
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Top comments
Yudith 28
Usually, you could just dump the leftovers in the trash and phone a friend, but there are scampi... Maybe phone a friend and tell him he can have scampi at your house while you trauma-dump on him?
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Comments (1)
Yudith 28
Usually, you could just dump the leftovers in the trash and phone a friend, but there are scampi... Maybe phone a friend and tell him he can have scampi at your house while you trauma-dump on him?