Health: Today, whilst brushing my teeth, I fell asleep, poking myself...

Noname 9 November 2008, 09:18 France

Today, whilst brushing my teeth, I fell asleep, poking myself in the eye with my toothbrush. FML

41 comments

Collection

Fall

Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.

Same thing different taste

Anonymous 31 July 2020, 02:03

Ouch

Today, while brushing my teeth half asleep, I stabbed myself in the eye with my toothbrush, toothpaste included. FML

4 comments

Talented73 25 April 2017, 20:00

Today, while brushing my teeth, I applied the toothpaste to my toothbrush when a few bristles got caught on the lip of the tube and flung a glob of toothpaste into my eye. My eye is now bloodshot, but at least it's minty fresh. FML

7 comments

Mirroronthewall 30 August 2009, 15:22 Canada

Multitasking

Today, I was brushing my teeth in my bathroom. As I looked in the mirror, I spotted a zit on my forehead. Keeping my toothbrush in my mouth, I quickly leaned in towards the mirror to pop the pimple, meanwhile lodging my toothbrush down my throat. I temporarily can't talk. FML

125 comments

lol 6 December 2009, 14:03 United Kingdom

Today, I sneezed while brushing my teeth and ended up with toothpaste in my eye. I haven't been able to see clearly for two hours. FML

87 comments

Such a rush 27 September 2025, 15:00

Yippee!

Today, I was brushing my teeth in a rush before work. I squeezed the toothpaste tube too hard, and some of it it shot directly into my eye. I spent the next ten minutes half-blind, crying peppermint tears, and still somehow managed to be late. FML

1 comment

530gangsta 25 April 2017, 16:00

Today, while having sex I managed to chip my tooth. FML

8 comments

ouch 5 October 2015, 19:20 Stockton, United States

Today, I cracked my tooth. I was so tired I put my pretzel stick in my tea and took a bite out of my spoon. FML

50 comments

captfml 15 December 2010, 22:32 United States

Today, I was in the bathroom in a rush to get ready. Without thinking, I put hand soap on my toothbrush. I didn't notice until it was already in my mouth. FML

124 comments

Anonymous 22 October 2021, 01:59

Blow it

Today, I reached to pick out a booger stuck in my nose that had been irritating me, and ended up poking myself in the eye. FML

1 comment

Anonymous 7 August 2021, 20:01

Hangry dude

Today, I accidentally bit so hard on my fork that I cracked my tooth. FML

1 comment

mattdanfrank 0

26 February 2009, 00:38

I've wading through the winging people and found you. You're not harping on about periods, pregnancies or being caught smoking weed - you poked yourself in your eye with your toothbrush, and for that you have my admiration. If anything can sum up the whole meaning of this site, it's poking yourself in the eye with your toothbrush. F*** my toothbrush, f*** my morning, f*** my life, I've just poked myself in my eye with my f***ing toothbrush F***! Excellent.