adam3650

Mr 36 years-old In a relationship

offbeans 17 February 2009, 02:29 United States

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

556 comments

woohoo420 4 April 2012, 16:14 Chino Hills, United States

Today, I was so baked out of my mind that I argued with my parakeet over who farted. I could be wrong, but I think I lost the argument. Worse still, my boyfriend had been standing in the doorway long enough to hear everything, even me farting. FML

371 comments