Today, while having sex with my girlfriend, she tells me that the flab on my stomach does not turn her on, and stops in the middle of it. Therefore, until my diet is over, guess who doesn't get any. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I've been dieting and working out trying to work towards some solid abs because I know my girlfriend digs that stuff. I've been miserable trying to achieve this goal, plus to make things even better while kissing today she grabbed my stomach and said "I just love your abs of... flab." FML
Today, while lying in bed with my girlfriend, she was grabbing the fat on my stomach. I said to her, "Quit touching my fat!" She replied, "So… don't touch you at all?" FML
Today, my boyfriend of a year and a half informed me that he had "accepted" my stomach, even though it didn't conform to his "preference" for a flat stomach. He then added that his acceptance doesn't extend to my "chunky thighs". FML
Today, the whole time my husband and I had sex, my stomach flab violently slapped my thighs. The harder he pumped, the louder the slapping got. Time to lose some weight. FML
Today, my girlfriend wanted to try having sex despite her serious body image issues. Unfortunately, I couldn't get it up due to how utterly terrified she looked. Now no matter what I say, she thinks it's all because her body is hideous. FML
Today, my boyfriend finally told me after over two years together that the reason we only have sex once a month is because my stomach is, “off-putting”. FML
Today, my girlfriend, who's on a diet, refused to give me a blow job because my sperm would "add useless calories" to her day. FML
Today, after many comments over years about her needing to lose weight, I had to tell the woman I love, the woman I married, that she had gotten so overweight that the sight of her naked made me want to puke. Apparently her goal was to get so fat I'd stop asking for sex. I'm her third divorce. FML
Today, I find out why my long term boyfriend hasn't been interested in sex for the last three months. It’s because I’m "fat." While I could probably lose a few, I'm not obese and I'm the one who's encouraging healthy eating and exercise in our house. FML
Today, I had to convince my girlfriend that, no matter how much she makes herself burp, she won't lose any weight. She still doesn't understand why. FML
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Top comments
abceasyas123abc 12
What ever happened to unconditional love??
honeypixi01 0
Tell her that her face doesn't turn you on and give her a facial to cover it up so you don't have to see it.
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Comments (187)
f0r3v3rchain3d 0
In the future, karma will give her a partner who refuses to have sex with her after he gets her pregnant!
crystalrain17 14
Even though pregnancy is just as much her partner's doing as her own? ...You know, you're probably right, considering men tend to be self-centered and misogynistic.
Persephone1001 3
Tell her that her shallowness does not turn you on and she won't be getting any favours, sexual or otherwise, until she stops being a bitch. I mean if you're on the verge of a heart attack then she may have a point, but personally I prefer a guy with a little extra weight to one with the whole freaky six pack thing...
Brandon1090 0
**** her. That is hella rude.
Edenbeam 19
If this was a girl, everyone would be telling her she deserved it. Hypocritical assholes.
dmarco96 0
no I think it's just the fat ppl that say shes a bitch. cuz they know they'd hate for the same thing to happen to them. a fat guy or girl deserves it. they're just fat asses
TurkTurkleton 0
Doesn't matter had sex! well at least you did today
hr1734 0
move on man!!
bswole 1
the sad part is diets dont end if you want them to work
SchiTzenGiglez 0
I wish the comment wasn't moderated so I could make fun of you. I have no idea what's going on ahhhh XD I fail
robberry 11
Lose the weight fatty!
Chancer07 0
That's sad... **** your girlfriend