Today, while feeling sorry for myself that I can't find a guy, a girl on the talk show I was watching said, "You're never gonna find a guy sitting at home in your jammies with the cat." I'm sitting at home in my jammies with the cat. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I got a cat so I'd have some company, since my roommate is always with her boyfriend. Too bad the cat likes her more. So now I get to sit and listen to her talk to her boyfriend to get to cuddle with my kitty. FML
Grab the balls by the horn, dude
Today, the only girl I've ever had eyes for said she can't find any good single men, all while sitting next to me. FML
Today, I tried to explain to my cat why I was single, but then I realized why. FML
Sick move, bro
Today, I bought my girlfriend a cat. I now have a cat and no girlfriend. FML
Today, I invited a guy I've been crushing on for ages to my house, and I really wanted to make a good impression. We were sitting in the living room having drinks when my cat came in, dragging a pair of my dirty underwear and dropped them right in front of us. FML
Stylist
Today, I got home, stripped down to my underwear, and laid on the couch. The cat came up, then started meowing loudly at me and bit my sides and legs until I put on sweats and a t-shirt. I now have a cat-enforced dress code. FML
Alexa, play "You'll Always Find Me In The Kitchen At Parties" by Jona Lewie
Today, the guy I'd been talking to online and liked came to my house party with a bunch of mutual friends. He spent the night sitting in the corner on the sofa talking to my cat. I woke up later to see that not only had he crashed for the night, but he'd curled up in the dog basket. FML
Never enough
Today, I realized the number of cats I currently have is higher than the number of guys I've ever dated. FML
Same
Today, I’m realising that at some point I should have just settled for the guys who were there, instead of waiting for the fantasy perfect guy. All my exes are happily married with grown kids, whereas I’m in my 50’s, never married, no kids or grandkids, and will probably die alone with my cat eating my face. FML
Cats > Humans
Today, I realized I’m always being told how “amazing” I am, yet no guy wants to choose me. I’m that girl who is always overlooked and friend-zoned. I have so much love to give yet I never get any of it in return. I guess I should adopt lots of cats and write off guys forever. FML
Top comments
Weslea Sanchez 12
Are they aware of online dating. I could find a date sitting on the couch in my underwear and binge watching Game of Thrones at the same time
WeirdUS 30
It would be better if they were pretty much unknown on IG then she could charge on snapr for the more risque pictures. They might find someone sitting on your couch but if that's primarly OP I doubt they'd stay long if it ever gets to that point
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Comments (4)
Weslea Sanchez 12
Are they aware of online dating. I could find a date sitting on the couch in my underwear and binge watching Game of Thrones at the same time
RichardPencil 32
Go scrape a bunch of photos from some instagram model and catfish a bunch of old, lonely dudes. You’ll never lack for male attention nor have to wear anything other than jammies. It’s a perfect plan except your cat is the only pussy that will get any exercise.
WeirdUS 30
It would be better if they were pretty much unknown on IG then she could charge on snapr for the more risque pictures. They might find someone sitting on your couch but if that's primarly OP I doubt they'd stay long if it ever gets to that point
TrashlifeKaylala 12
Thats not true. My boyfriend found me by messaging me on fb while i was sitting in my jammies with my cat 🤣🥰
IHaveThePower 18
So...maybe find a guy who wants to hang out with you and the cat in jammies? Because that sounds epic to me.