Today, while driving, I saw a car pull over with its hazard lights on. I went to see if they needed help, only to see the guy was jerking off to something on his phone. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, while I was waiting at a bus stop, a man stopped at the red light and smiled at me. I smiled back. He blew me a kiss and drove away, just as I realized he was masturbating behind the wheel. FML
Today, while on the way to Florida for spring break, I pointed out to my mom a bright blue car in the rear-view mirror. As the car overtook us, we both got a horrifyingly detailed view of the driver jerking off her passenger. FML
My eyes!
Today, I got lost in a car park, late at night, unable to find my car. I started panicking, so I called my dad. I sat down to catch my breath. After about 2 minutes, I heard a noise. I looked up to see a guy jerking off while watching me. He smiled, so I instinctively threw my backpack at his junk and he ran off. FML
Today, after leaving a store I got stuck at a red light. A car pulled up next to me and there was a half retarded man jerking his junk at me. Nasty image burned into my corneas forever. FML
Today, as I was pulling out of my apartment complex, I was rear-ended. When I got out of my car to see how bad the damage was, I wondered why the other guy wasn't getting out of his. As it turns out, he was busy pleasing himself. I found out when I approached his car. FML
Today, I saw a bad car wreck. I pulled over and ran to the car to find an unconscious man behind the wheel. Another car pulled up, and a guy got out. I was relieved to have help, until, to my horror, he started trying to hit on me. I was stuck with him until the ambulance arrived. FML
Reverse Uno card
Today, I was driving when I noticed that the guy in front was on the phone. I pulled up next to him, pulled out my phone and I made a gesture that he needed to put his phone away. It was a cop. I got a ticket for driving while on my cell phone. FML
Mind your own business
Today, while I was driving, a pedestrian gesticulated wildly at me for being on my phone. I was just tucking my hair behind my ear. FML
Today, while driving home from work, I saw my boyfriend mugging a woman on the sidewalk. FML
DUDE! WTF?
Today, I'd been sat in traffic for about an hour. I've heard stories about people doing the dirty in their cars, and I never do anything risky so I thought, why not, I'll be here a while, no one can see me: I'll masturbate. Midway through, I heard a tap on my driver's window. It was a police officer. FML
Top comments
IAmzephyr 22
car jacking?
Edward862 7
yeah, I should probably apologize for that.
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Comments (88)
Girlshotdown1 21
i remember i got in a really bad car accident i flipped my car 3x on the highway then while i was trying to wave someone down. people we slowing down to take pictures . I threw a rock at their car
saizml 9
Today I saw something on my phone that REALLY turned me on so I pulled over to take care of it and some ass pulled up to see if I was ok totally lost the mood FML
extremereviews 26
Did you still offer to help?
alberg18 12
damn talk about being patient and wait til you get home lol
barlos88 19
And they say texting and driving is a distraction...
ApplePie1994 27
did he tell you to beat it?
anonamous14 9
I didn't help him after I saw what his "emergency" was, I drove away and didn't look back!
Influentsum 3
Haha that's funny and weird
Altrnate_Reality 14
Ugh! Story of my life..I walk in on these things all the time.
blackonblight 33
You're lucky he was stopped. I've seen plenty of news stories about people driving down the highway, visibly jerking. One guy was trying to show off as he did so, if my memory is correct. (I'm almost certain more than one of these stories occurred in Florida)