Today, while at dinner with my current boyfriend, my ex walked in with his new girlfriend. The waiter put them at the table next to ours, and the two of them had a front row seat to me spilling an entire guacamole salad on my lap out of nervousness. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was at dinner with my boyfriend. About 30 minutes into dinner and I see my exes come in, one by one. In the end, they were all sitting at the same table. My boyfriend got up and went to the bathroom. He came back and sat down with them. Apparently my boyfriend went through my phone and called all of them. FML
Today, my ex, who I still live with, invited he’s best friend (a drama starter) and his new love interest over for dinner while I was at work. Now I’m outside, waiting for them both to leave. FML
Today, I was eating a fancy dinner with my girlfriend at a restaurant. Suddenly, my ex-girlfriend, who was seemingly still angry after our breakup 2 years ago, saw me through the window. She walked in, took my spaghetti dinner, shoved it in my face, and stormed out. FML
Today, I was eating lunch on my first date with a really pretty girl, when my ex shows up at the same restaurant and starts telling her how bad of a boyfriend I was. My date left. FML
Today, I went to dinner at my parents' house. I was going to surprise them by introducing them to my new boyfriend. They decided to surprise me too, by inviting my ex to the dinner. Everyone was surprised tonight. FML
Today, I took a date to a new restaurant I’d never been to before. Wish I had been because it turns out two of my ex-girlfriends work there as waitresses. Luckily they were amicable break-ups, but it was still hella awkward every time they brought stuff to the table. FML
Today, my old high school mates organised a dinner hangout so that my recent ex, who is part of our group, could introducing her new boyfriend to us. I was late and the only remaining seat available was next to the new boyfriend. FML
Today, in the middle of our one year anniversary dinner, my boyfriend's ex-girlfriend showed up declaring her love for him. They left together and I had to take the bus home. FML
Today, I discovered I was at the same restaurant as my ex and his new girlfriend. Quickly, I picked up my mother's phone when she wasn't looking, and began to pretend to talk to a fake new boyfriend. Few seconds later, the waiter loudly asked me if I was done talking into the calculator. FML
Today, my boyfriend brought me to a restaurant on a surprise date. I guess he didn't know that my ex-boyfriend now works there, and that he would be our waiter for the evening. FML
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Top comments
EBrennan 0
walk it off, if your happy with your new boyfriend that's all that matters.
remy3106 10
haha that sucks, next time don't be soo nervous!:)
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Comments (94)
remy3106 10
haha that sucks, next time don't be soo nervous!:)
breegee 0
lol that sucks.
Tasanasanta 0
5- Why did you basically quote #1 :S OP- Did you think your ex really cared? Just have a good night with your current bf and f*ck him.
mcsquanch 0
what is the craziest color h have dyed yer hair?
catsareahmazing 0
Ydi for being black.
UtterCatastrophe 4
6: I love your picture!!! it's so cute! :) OP: You shouldn't have been so nervous. I mean if you had another boyfriend, you should have been over you ex. And when you see him in public, you just show you have someone better now.
pepsie_fml 0
responding ti number 22 . i got rainbow highlights. it took forever though
KingDingALing 9
OP- That sounds like something i would do... Not go on a date with a guy, if that's what people are thinking. -___- But I would be clumsy as hell if i were nervous.
DudeImBetter 0
wow 1's mean she says message me unless your ugly
aadk 0
get over your ex!
Thawn 0
lol 60. does that mean she isn't allowed to message herself? XP
Busterfml 0
Why be nervous about the presence of an ex. Either you are friends and things should be ok, or you don't care and they are basically strangers. Well at least it was just a salad spill and not a verbal slip of the tongue in front of your ex. That would actually be an FML.
skittle68 0
It sounds easy but you cant really control that sort of thing. I went to my first doubles tournament with my bf a few months ago and my ex bf from like 6 years ago (who I am still friends with, although we really only talk when we hang out with mutual friends) was playing in our group on another team. I played like crap because I was a little nervous about it. which sucked because A) I would have liked to play well for my bf, and B) I would have liked to show off a little in front of my ex
atticuz 2
Be a boss.
mustardcat 1
find a new place to go to and avoid confrontation
remy3106 10
22, I've died my hair every color from like orange to bright red, I hvent died it yellow yet tho. haha an 60 I know I'm ugly
BakNBitz 0
60 and dumb because he called you mean not ugly
hd9280 0
hey... she said she knows it anyway... lol.
evamusical 12
88 i don't think you're ugly...
mshoes12346 3
awww!:( just act like they arent there!
cbroxs17 0
too late now
Lushhhhhh 0
YDI. This is epic.
jdub28 0
how is spilled guacamole epic?
tngodzilla 0
Everyone knows we are having a guacamole shortage! She probably still had to eat it!
EBrennan 0
walk it off, if your happy with your new boyfriend that's all that matters.
Graawr 7
I agree she should've been proud of her current bf. Unless she doesn't really love him.
Mortanious 0
Little girl needs to open her mouth so the train can carry the guacamole in.
C19_fml 9
This^^
fishertruck 0
Ydi op..for getting nervous around your ex who was a whole table away.Learn to only be nervous around yourself and you might just make it somewhere.
FFML_314 12
Guacamole is disgusting, so YDI.
redbluegreen 41
Agreed. Bleh. Disgusting stuff.
FFML_314 12
People who like Guacamole...are...gross.
redbluegreen 41
I grew up in a Spanish household, so naturally I hate any and all kinds of Mexican food.
FFML_314 12
You are English. You /love/ Guacamole. Don't you dare lie.
redbluegreen 41
Guacamole mustaches are not an option.
InDenial 6
Same. I hate Guacamole. Absolutely disgusting.
sharmen 0
Guacamole is delicious. I want some right now.
FFML_314 12
Pendatik, filling your car with Guacamole, doesn't count either. You like to freeze it and lick it like a popcicle. Just admit it!
RedPillSucks 33
Once you try the Guac, you never go back.
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
Don't hate, appreciate! Or I'll pop a guac in your mouth and make you a brain slushie!
honestlove11 0
:( I like guacamole lol
FFML_314 12
You're just trying to avoid getting the hose again.
hd9280 0
WTF?! guacamole is awesome! keep ur bland foods.
FFML_314 12
Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. I'll have Jane kick your ass! I think she will have my back. 65, how dare you talk back to me! Back you savage!
nerdsgetmehot 23
Oh no! I'm an avid lover of guacamole and avocado in general... :( (By which I mean that I love it, not that I make love to it. That's just odd.)
hd9280 0
LOL.
RedPillSucks 33
*sits down with a huge bowl of popcorn, waiting for 'nerdsgetmehot' to get it on with her avocado*
FFML_314 12
RPS, we finished like 20 minutes ago. Just missed it! You need to be more tuned into these here comments! You're missing all the action.
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
I'm Team Guac. You both get the hose. Wait, no-- pen would like that. Anna gets the hose, pen doesn't. And nerds, you're spoiling his fantasies AND his dinner. Mmm, guacamole with genuine Mexican Guacachips. Om nom nom. Don't care for other moles, though, especially the hairy kind.
nerdsgetmehot 23
I'm eating avocado right now! ...And no, that's not a euphemism. :O
redbluegreen 41
I'll just be over here on my beanbag chair eating Thai food.
sevans 0
no reason to be nervous he has moved on and I'd assume you have to but by your actions I'm probably wrong so you need to just get him out of your head
mcsquanch 0
You shoulda just got drunk as a motha fucka!
sweetTnt_fml 0
U rellllllll SCUPID!