Today, when I told my family I was a vegetarian, I expected them to make fun of me because that's just my family. But what I wasn't expecting was my dad to use raw meat as a puppet and make it say, "Eat me! Eat me!" then throw it at my face. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Digging my heels in
Today, my family dragged me to a steakhouse, knowing full well I'm vegan. I sat there, with my sad little salad, watching as they stuffed themselves with burned animal flesh and laughed at me. They wonder why I hate them all. FML
Pay no mind
Today, I've been a vegan for a year. It's also the day that I met my dad's new best friend, who happens to be a retired butcher. They tried to pull an intervention on me for not "being sensible" by eating meat. FML
Today, my mom told me that when my sister and I were born, the first thing my dad said was, "I hope they don't turn out vegetarian." I did. FML
Acquired taste
Today, my daughter said she wanted to be vegetarian like me. Beaming with pride, I made her plant-based burgers for dinner. She took one bite, screamed, "EW!" and started crying and begging for beef burgers. FML
Today, we had guests coming over. My dad wanted me to make some bacon, but I refused because I'm a vegetarian, and don't like to touch meat. His response? 'Good joke honey, now make the bacon.' FML
Today, my dad announced to the whole family that we will be having a vegetarian dinner this Christmas to make my step-mum happy. FML
Today, my vegan step-mom found out I ate at McDonald's yesterday. She gave me hell and asked me how it feels to give money to "murderers". All while my dad sat quietly by because he's too whipped to speak his mind. It wasn't even her house a month ago. FML
Today, my girlfriend's parents wanted to cook dinner for me. After a whole day of cooking up a storm, her parents cooked an elaborate meal of roast lamb, pork chops and grilled chicken. Rejecting a meal is like spitting in ones face in Chinese culture. I'm vegetarian. FML
Disconnect
Today, I told my younger sister that meat comes from cute animals like chickens and cows, hoping she'd want to be vegan like me. Instead, she laughed and made up a song about how chickens turn into tenders and cows turn into cheeseburgers. I ended up being the one who got upset. FML
Today, after being a vegetarian for 5 years, I found out that my boyfriend of 2 years has secretly been feeding me meat. His reason is that he thinks it's "funny" that I still call myself a vegetarian afterwards. FML
Top comments
Drew167 8
Well your father seems rather accepting.
mpsteve137 15
Say EAT THIS!!! And punch him in the face
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Comments (136)
lilysmiles143 0
ew who does that?! oh yea your dad
alphaskater09 9
No shit.
DrownedMyFish 18
How often does your father put his meat in your face?
l23VIVE 17
^Noor I always love your comments, they always brighten my day... Especially today though, thanks for being Funny
ambowew 7
No beef, no chicken, and not even ham. And please don't make me think about lamb. I told my folks, but didn't think to duck. My dad thinks he's cool, he don't give a ****. If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge some meat.
Qandol 26
Didn't made any sense:(
missyj0 12
I thought it was pretty creative.
nevershoutkendal_fml 11
*slab. Or you can slap him with a slap as well.
olpally 33
If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball... What?? *throws wrench, hits Justin long in the face* :D
day624 14
Apparently meat hats are fashionable nowadays, he's just doing whats best for you
l23VIVE 17
Just ask Lady Gaga
day624 14
Exactly
emilymcmasters22 0
He obviously approves.
l23VIVE 17
53 just stop commenting... On the past couple threads you keep getting buried, so take my advice and just stop commenting
pizzaboy69 4
You should pull down your pants start stroking your pussy and say eat me eat me
DrownedMyFish 18
You are one sick puppy.
MrFuzzles 5
To her father.... Wtf is going through your head. Wait, actually don't tell me. Oh and this is your first comment! Welcome to FML, bad comments get people burned on crosses here.
Mariee95 0
You are ******* disgusting. I'm very insulted by this
pizzaboy69 4
Oh shit did I say pussy I meant pork
pizzaboy69 4
Hmmm yeah I tried that
Mariee95 0
Such a douchbag
nevershoutkendal_fml 11
You're kind of a sick **** for this. Only if you knew that it was OP's dad.
emilymcmasters22 0
53: What the ****?
mvems 13
Well, isn't he supportive and creative.
Kbearlove23 0
1 word Salmonella
NIRVANA1990s 1
that is actually kinda funny
pink_raindrops 26
When I became a vegetarian my dad waved a hotdog in my face and tried to force me to eat it. When I slapped it out of his hand, down onto the floor, he yelled at me for wasting food. After a bit he actually became supportive of it and tried to buy me tofu and things like that. Maybe your dad will become supportive when he realizes it isn't just some kind of faze you're going through.
Airman1988 9
Shame on you for not eating your dad's wiener Lol.
alycion 39
I'm not vegetarian myself but I have quite a few friends who are vegan and vegetarian. My husband also did it for awhile. We do try to limit meat consumption though. I'll have vegetarian nights when I make dinner. As long as when someone makes the choice to eliminate meat they don't judge those who still eat it, to each their own. And people who choose to eat meat need to stop judging as well. I do know I have food allergies to stuff like tofu and satan. I do enjoy the challenge of cooking vegetarian meals without meat replacements though. It keeps our menu fresh. Op don't let your father get to you.
TheMathMajor 26
I'm a vegetarian and I hardly ever eat meet replacements. There's no need to :) And, 32, why do you say he would be supportive if it's just a phase? He should be supportive regardless. There aren't any negative health effects if she actually eats vegetables and not just pasta and bread. And if she still eats dairy and eggs she doesn't need to worry about getting B12. I always wonder why people can be so judgmental of a harmless lifestyle choice. I guess it's mostly because of ignorance.
greeneyedpothead 10
I didn't know people could be allergic to Satan 0.0
SwordOfTheSky 4
You're allergic to the devil? lol Or is satan just something I'm unfamiliar with?