Today, when I had a go at my husband for spending way too much time in front of the TV, he pointed the remote control at me while miming turning down the volume in order to make me shut up. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, as soon as I got home, my husband said he was hungry and that I needed to cook. I flipped my shit and yelled at him for a good half hour. Later, he pulled out his phone and showed me videos of me doing the exact thing to him, asking him to do things the second he walked in the door. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were watching TV, I asked him if he loved me. He turned up the volume. FML
Today, I was trying to lower the volume on my TV, but nothing was happening. I got increasingly frustrated, smacking the remote and yelling at the screen. My brain finally woke up when I realized I was holding the air conditioning remote and had been turning my living room into a freezer instead. FML
Today, I tried to get my son off of the couch by turning off the wifi. Afterward, I went to watch tv. Turns out he got me back by turning off the cable. FML
Today, I yelled at my husband for staying out till after 9 and not having done any of the chores. He turned round and yelled right back at me for letting him sit alone at the restaurant, getting sympathy from the waiters, because I clearly forgot today was our anniversary dinner. Whoops. FML
Today, my wife bitched me out 3 times in a row, for things that were not even my fault: for turning my Xbox on, even though I only nudged the button accidentally with my toe; opening a beer when it was actually a Pepsi for our son, and walking loudly when I "know she has a headache," which I didn’t. FML
Today, I shouted at my husband for buying a video game, saying that money wasted on his dumb childish bullshit could be spent on a nice vacation or date night. He quietly packed a bag and left. I'm getting the locks changed. Good riddance. FML
Today, I was watching our home security cameras from work when I saw my husband get home and grab a beer. I activated the camera microphone and told him to put it back and fold the laundry. He flipped off the camera, chugged the beer, and started jacking off on the living room sofa. FML
Today, the TV was blaring, the kids were yelling, and my wife was blabbering on in my ear. Overwhelmed, I shouted, "EVERYONE QUIET!" I got a second of blessed silence before my kids started screaming and crying, and my wife threw a tantrum, saying, "I married a psycho!" FML
Today, after my husband yelled at me for wasting money by getting my nails done, I decided to buy the supplies and watch YouTube to figure out how to do them myself. He then yelled at me for wasting money on the supplies. FML
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Top comments
faxe 0
Your husband is a hero to nagged husbands everywhere.
happykiddo20 0
loool xDD u should try leaving him some peace, every man wants their free time with no women and no work but that was funny xDDD
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Comments (90)
cr4ckb0n3f4n 0
just dump the bastard
The_Pleb 0
Lol i do this all the time, on my remote i have 5 buttons. 1. Standby 2. Mute 3. Cook 4. Clean 5. Sex What buttons do you guys have? share with us Thankyou in advance
fearall 0
and why? blasting out at her husband isnt going to solve shit to begin with. if she had a proper discussion with him the outcome might be different
bored690 0
HAHAHA I just point the remote at my boyfriend and go MUTE
Forn2 0
My buttons are: 1.fast sex 2.slow sex 3.Beach sex 4.video-like sex 5.sex
whataloadofbull 0
yall forgot about the absolutely essential button: Make a sammwich
UrbanerMezei 0
I love how everyone's first idea in this society is divorce, obviously the relationship has hit a wall but your first reaction should be to work the problem and solve it, not to enter costly legal proceedings and even more hurt feelings breaking up something you chose for life in the first place. I just hate the way people assume now they'll have 2 to 3 marriages in life, for Christ sake date longer people.
MagicMeds 0
How long should he be for me to date him Mr. 85?
Reyo 2
um...then shut up? Seriosly, what the hell is yelling going to do? All that does is make you sound like a steriotypical housewife.
lovemysnubber 0
agreed!
B4SK3TB4IL 0
1. sex 2. sammich that's all u really need
falugabubble 0
Make me a sammich woman xD
The_Color_Abi 0
What a twat - break up with him!
happykiddo20 0
loool xDD u should try leaving him some peace, every man wants their free time with no women and no work but that was funny xDDD
woosah 16
kinda funny? kinda hilarious! I would not be able to be mad after that. if anything it should have lightened the mood. I like him.
Playdate 0
Time to hide the remote and stop making his dinner. Also, I hear couches are nice and uncomfortable for men this time of year - make him sleep on it!
dspadres 0
*points remote at you* Did it work?
diet_otaku 0
every husband on the face of the planet has done this at some point. not an FML.
faxe 0
Your husband is a hero to nagged husbands everywhere.
SenGaeriel 3
Wives do it, too. This was supposed to be under #5, not #6. :P
mirix 6
how rude, divorce!! He obviously cares more about the t.v. than you -.-
Sargasm 4
Newsflash: he's probably watching TV to get away from your nagging.
Books4Me 0
Newsflash: Who said she was nagging? Just because she was complaining this time doesn't mean it's a constant thing she complains about. She has a right to tell him she thinks he watches too much tv. I bet you're one of those people who thinks that because someone complains at you about something once or even a few times means they're being naggy. Instead of writing someone off as naggy, consider what they're actually saying.
diet_otaku 0
"having a go" at someone doesn't exactly imply "honey, i'd appreciate it if you spent a little less time watching TV."
Sargasm 4
What #13 said. #11: "I bet you're one of those people who thinks that because someone complains at you about something once or even a few times means they're being naggy." Sorry, looks like you just lost a bet. And stop nagging.
pipp360 0
shut up @11 u look like a ******* ginger
Antivirus_fml 0
WTF! If he want to watch the TV, LET HIM! He can do whatrever he want, dont try to rule him. I say FHL. :/
capnjax 0
Absolutely, STFU and get back to cleaning!
woosah 16
ok let's just relax 21. shut up for a bit
TedFreakingBundy 0
Why were you out of the kitchen?
diet_otaku 0
win. XD
TedFreakingBundy 0
-thumbs up; teeth sparkle-