Today, my younger brother and my parents were in my dorm room. When I wasn't looking, my brother opened the top drawer of my dresser (where I had a tube of half-used lube) and asked out loud: "What's Astroglide?" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went into my older brother's room to get a condom. This happened the other day too when my boyfriend forgot one. So I went in and there was a note that said, "Stop using my condoms. And your boyfriend sounds like a girl when he climaxes." FML
Today, I caught my brother whacking off with my expensive bottle of lotion. This might not have been quite so disturbing had he not been caught with his entire penis in the bottle. FML
Today, my 10 year old brother caught me masturbating and then said "Oh, so that's how you do it!". He then ran to his room and locked the door. I inadvertently taught my little brother how to masturbate. FML
Today, I was teasing my little brother. Later that night, I went to the bathroom to wash up. While I'm brushing my teeth, my little brother slips a photo under the door that shows him scrubbing my toothbrush against his nuts. FML
Today, my brother said he was cleaning his room. When I walked in, he was giving my cousin a blowjob. FML
Today, I walked in on my brother completely naked from the waist down. I wouldn't have cared if he wasn't masturbating using my lingerie. FML
Today, while babysitting, the oldest little girl who is 7 went through my purse. She pulled out a half empty bottle of lube. She asked what it was and I told her lotion. I went to the bathroom and when I came out, the bottle was empty and there were 4 kids covered in lube. Then their mom came home. FML
Today, my brother woke me up by hitting me in the face with a rubber dildo. FML
Today, I walked in on my brother having sex. With my boyfriend. FML
Today, my older brother walked in on me while I was wearing nothing but a bra, panties, pantyhose, and high heels. I'm his little brother. FML
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Top comments
audyy_fml 0
"a tube of half-used lube".. this is really different than a half-used tube of lube..
AliSama 17
what is Astroglide? seriously? *google is my friend* Ewww. lol.
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Comments (32)
AliSama 17
what is Astroglide? seriously? *google is my friend* Ewww. lol.
Epoch 0
um. astroglide is GAY sex lube.
jimmyjamesyall 4
I mean, or for hetero normal or anal... but that's cool, too, you shut-in.
fuzzycubby 0
Dumbass, so what if it's GAY lube. You have a problem with gays?
Sheepiebeepie 26
It's just regular lube, homophobe.
mikeloyst 0
number 8, thats probably why hes **** my life. His parents assume he'll be hooking up with girls....if they have no idea hes gay. And to everyone saying how his younger brother and parents are in his dorm? that probably means they are visiting him at college, so he usually does not have to hide his shit.
lil_ham1644 29
G
anyagrande 31
Me and my boyfriend use lube for sex (i am female) it makes it wayyy more comfortable, its not just gay males that use lube
SxBxLova 0
Embarrassing =[
silly_kate 0
YDI for letting your brother go through your stuff!
quickit 24
Really?
idefka 34
YDTDFBS : You deserve this downvote for being stupid
horse_lvr96 0
uhhh wen they WERENT looking theyy ddnt let him idiot
ChefPhilly 13
Do you know how to spell?
LoosechangeXxXx 0
He wont be snooping any more lol
LemonMan 0
The top drawer.....really? YDI
dragonfire002 0
wow...... maybe keep stuff put away better you sir fail.
adrifter 0
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! ****** pants*