Today, my very traditional grandmother has decided it's time for me to get married to Kevin. She's called half the town and informed them of the good news. I'm 17. I've never met Kevin. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my grandmother introduced me to her friends as her 16-year-old granddaughter "who has never been kissed." FML
Today, my grandmother called me in a fit of panic because her new neighbors are black. So is my fiancé, whom she is supposed to meet tomorrow. FML
Today, while visiting family in my very small hometown for the summer, I met a guy and we really hit it off. Everything was going great, and I brought him home to meet my family, where my grandmother told me he was 16. Now I’m definitely not getting lucky this trip. FML
Today, at my younger sister's wedding, my hospitalised grandmother called to ask if I have a boyfriend yet, both my parents wondered if I'll ever get married, and when the 13-year-old next to me caught the bouquet, his father yelled from the back to give it to me instead. FML
Today, my 70-year-old grandmother held a celebration over officially having divorced my grandfather. FML
Today, my grandmother called me to tell me that there will be a nice, single guy for me to meet at the family reunion. She went on and on about how perfect he was for me. I didn't have the heart to tell her I'm a lesbian, and have been out to the rest of the family for over six years. FML
Today, my girlfriend of two years finally agreed to marry me. As I went on with the proposal, her Grandma tried rejecting me by saying, "These guys have gangster friends." FML
Today, I learned my 40 year old father is marrying a girl barely a year and a half older than me. She told me not to be afraid to call her mom. I was torn between punching her in the face and vomiting. FML
Today, my dad married his fiancée, who insists I call her "Mom." I'm three years older than her, and went to the same high school. She's taking me shopping next week to buy me "something nice." FML
Today, to avoid disappointing my excited great grandmother, I still attended a small family dinner to celebrate my engagement. My fiancé and I split last night, I haven't slept and had to tell her he was caught up at work. FML
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Top comments
Kingdutch 3
I feel bad for you FYL do we get invites? :D
perdix 31
Grandma's insane. . . there is no Kevin. If there is, go live in the other half of the town.
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Comments (118)
ananamoose 0
Says the man who eats Panda Pussy, like she wouldn't know that, your name gives off more wit than you actually will everhave
smiller0789 3
Are you sure she's just traditional and not senile?
btrain9 0
hahaha.... let me get a quop of whatever your grandma is on ;)
ginasays 0
...is this not almost the exact same fml as a couple days ago, except that its the grandmother instead of the parents, and that she told people?
SpankyMcThrust 6
Right, like that's the only time it can happen.
CallMeHush 1
Time to start picking out that nursing home for grandma. Or you could just take and leave her at the dog track with a twenty dollar bill pinned to her jacket.
WTFsGoingOn 0
Well, I don't think you should marry Kevin, but maybe you could at least meet him. He's probably as concerned about his grandmother as you are about yours, as I assume that Kevin is not the person instigating this on his side (if his side even is aware!). Tell him you're poor and that your parents wasted your dowry. If he is a really old school kind of guy that might scare him away :)
DameGreyWulf 1
HAH excellent point.
bexox 0
People in Canada and the U.S. still have a dowry? That's news to me!
guilty4associate 0
Quebec doesn't really count as part of Canada. Full of freaks.
Red_Bull_yay 0
Woah, Quebec isn't "full of freaks". I'm from Quebec and I am in no way a crazy super-extreme-separtist (I'm assuming these are the "freaks" you are refering to). I think I've only seriously met one in my life...while traveling in another country. We make up for having some separtists with kick ass poutine.
dearambivalence 0
Poutine looks absolutely delicious!
greeneye_fml 12
Call half the town and explain your granny has Alzheimer's or dementia or is just getting to the crazy old age phase. They'll understand.
WTFsGoingOn 0
I bet Kevin will understand too.
MURPHYCHACHO 5
So don't marry him. How is this an FML?
MzRodriquez95 0
Omg, how do you not know Kevin. Even i know Kevin Lol But FYL for not knowing Kevin cool guy by the way
thekingjoe90 0
i'd tell her to **** off