Today, my sister had her batmitzvah. During the party, there is a tradition where the batmitzvah gets lifted on a chair, and so does her family. It was my turn after my sister's. I got in the chair. They couldn't lift me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to a Bat Mitzvah. We played a game where all of the girls grabbed one of their shoes and placed it in the middle. Then, all of the guys had to pick a shoe. Whatever guy picked the shoe, the girl had to dance with. No one picked my shoe. Everyone else was dancing except for me. FML
Today, while at a family gathering, I sat down in a chair and it broke. Embarrassed, I picked myself up and sat down in another chair. That one broke too. I'm now the "fat girl" of the family despite weighing 90 pounds. FML
Today, I was at my friend's Bar Mitzvah. After he finished his long-winded speech, I sarcastically did the mockingjay sign from the Hunger Games. It took a couple of seconds before I realized how that looked, and a couple more for me to be shouted down and kicked out. FML
Today, I got married. I'm Jewish, and it's traditional to break a glass cup by stepping on it after giving the bride her ring. My brother thought it would be funny to replace the glass cup with a rubber one. I slipped and fell flat on my back. FML
Today, I’m supposed to be a bridesmaid at my sister's wedding, but she doesn’t want me in the photos because I’m over a foot taller than her and the other bridesmaids, and it will look silly in the photos. I told her I won’t even bother attending, and mom actually took her side. FML
Today, my son took his very first steps. Unfortunately, it was during my sister's wedding. She had a full-blown bridezilla meltdown over how he "stole her spotlight". FML
Today, my mum told me that my sister's little kiddie swing wouldn't hold my weight. I told her she was being stupid, and went on anyway. A broken ankle and two pins in my elbow later, I'm willing to accept this. FML
Today, my sister backed out of my wedding because it was becoming too much about me. After I begged her to reconsider, I had no choice but to pick a new bridesmaid. When my new bridesmaid posted on Facebook how excited she was, my sister commented, "See, you made HER feel special." FML
Today, I was at a party, and I sat down on a chair. While conversing with friends, I shifted places on the chair, and broke it. Embarrassed, I then stood up and change chairs. After moving to the next chair, I broke that one too. FML
Today, I was the maid of honor at my sister's wedding. I was the first one to walk down the aisle, where I managed to trip over a wire, shutting off the music and falling on my face. My family cheered and took pictures. FML
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Top comments
Kamazar 0
"The snickers won't stop leaping into my mouth. FML"
Vincenzo_fml 1
Being too heavy isn't always the result of being too fat, look at me, I'm 6' tall and about 230 lbs, but I also hit the gym anywhere from 4 - 6 times a week. Muscle has a higher density than fat, as such, it makes you heavier than you appear to be.
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Comments (112)
skarime 0
well here's my opinion. If a bunch of people can't lift you up on a chair . . . either lose weight or get strong people . . . I'd personally go with lose weight
24788 7
Stop complaining about it and lose some weight. You can't expect people to feel bad for you over something that you have control over.
sadlozer 0
#82-"she was pubically humiliated for it" LOL @ mental image.
tigercalf 0
The people that were trying to lift you were probably just thinking, **** my life.......
rinariot_fml 0
Man, if this person wasn't fat, why would they post a FML? if they didn't want people knowing they are fat, why post a FML? just because people call the person fat doesn't mean they're skinny mini. You people red to grow up and get the **** over it. Most people in the qorlsthese days, are fat. People who aren't should be happy. So go on a diet complailing fat people. It's not our problem, it's yours. People who are skinny normally take care of themselves, I assume that's definately some thing to be proud of.
Spiffy 0
We do the chair lifting thing at Palestinian weddings as well, but only the bride and groom get lifted not the whole family. Our cultures are similar I don't understand why we're fighting all the time! but yea that must have been embarrassing sorry to hear that :(
PureGold 0
I've had to do that...at my bat mitzvah and my sister's. You didn't miss much lol xP. #84: Bar Mitzvah is for a guy, Bat Mitvah is for a girl. :)
Vincenzo_fml 1
#83 I know plenty of people who wold disagree with you, genetics decides how your made, it gives you a mold to work with, but you can change a lot of things about yourself. A buddy of mine was what you would call genetically fat, his sister is fat, his parents are fat, his grandparents are fat. He's just from a fat family. He didn't like it, he started eating right, he worked his ass off in the gym and lost the weight. Just because you're born fa doesn't mean you'll always be fat. Every minute you spend making up an excuse for why your fat is a minute you're not doing something about it. In 5 years ago I weighed a measly 150 lbs, I've been in the gym, playing sports, sweating more in a day than some people do in a month, I've put on at least 80 pounds of muscle (80 pounds heavier, don't know how much fat was lost, if any), I'm a ton stronger and I feel ******* awesome about myself. I could change, the OP can change, every fat ass that bitches about it can change, you just have to want it bad enough.
lonelygirl00 0
hahahaha, that sucks.. People need more arm strength :)
Glitchman_fml 0
Ha ha, that's gotta suck. I'm sorry, but you must be quite...hefty if 4 people couldn't lift you. I remember being at one of those for a Jewish friend, and we even succeeded (eventually) carrying the 190lb older sister (factor in that she was 5 feet tall so she was pretty wide). Maybe the people lifting you just happened to be pathetically weak though. Either way, that's one pretty obvious hint to either hit the gym or start eating right.