Today, my sister had her batmitzvah. During the party, there is a tradition where the batmitzvah gets lifted on a chair, and so does her family. It was my turn after my sister's. I got in the chair. They couldn't lift me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to a Bat Mitzvah. We played a game where all of the girls grabbed one of their shoes and placed it in the middle. Then, all of the guys had to pick a shoe. Whatever guy picked the shoe, the girl had to dance with. No one picked my shoe. Everyone else was dancing except for me. FML
Today, while at a family gathering, I sat down in a chair and it broke. Embarrassed, I picked myself up and sat down in another chair. That one broke too. I'm now the "fat girl" of the family despite weighing 90 pounds. FML
Today, I was at my friend's Bar Mitzvah. After he finished his long-winded speech, I sarcastically did the mockingjay sign from the Hunger Games. It took a couple of seconds before I realized how that looked, and a couple more for me to be shouted down and kicked out. FML
Today, I got married. I'm Jewish, and it's traditional to break a glass cup by stepping on it after giving the bride her ring. My brother thought it would be funny to replace the glass cup with a rubber one. I slipped and fell flat on my back. FML
Today, I’m supposed to be a bridesmaid at my sister's wedding, but she doesn’t want me in the photos because I’m over a foot taller than her and the other bridesmaids, and it will look silly in the photos. I told her I won’t even bother attending, and mom actually took her side. FML
Today, my son took his very first steps. Unfortunately, it was during my sister's wedding. She had a full-blown bridezilla meltdown over how he "stole her spotlight". FML
Today, my mum told me that my sister's little kiddie swing wouldn't hold my weight. I told her she was being stupid, and went on anyway. A broken ankle and two pins in my elbow later, I'm willing to accept this. FML
Today, my sister backed out of my wedding because it was becoming too much about me. After I begged her to reconsider, I had no choice but to pick a new bridesmaid. When my new bridesmaid posted on Facebook how excited she was, my sister commented, "See, you made HER feel special." FML
Today, I was at a party, and I sat down on a chair. While conversing with friends, I shifted places on the chair, and broke it. Embarrassed, I then stood up and change chairs. After moving to the next chair, I broke that one too. FML
Today, I was the maid of honor at my sister's wedding. I was the first one to walk down the aisle, where I managed to trip over a wire, shutting off the music and falling on my face. My family cheered and took pictures. FML
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Top comments
Kamazar 0
"The snickers won't stop leaping into my mouth. FML"
Vincenzo_fml 1
Being too heavy isn't always the result of being too fat, look at me, I'm 6' tall and about 230 lbs, but I also hit the gym anywhere from 4 - 6 times a week. Muscle has a higher density than fat, as such, it makes you heavier than you appear to be.
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Comments (112)
MrJentipede 2
This is nothing besides a "you deserved it."
thabeast 0
if youre fat then its your fault if youre ripped then it's your fault too but if youre ripped then thats good ether way i have no pity for you
TurtleLG 0
You don't go onto FML and post because you're fat. There's lots of fat people. And, yes, it is your fault that your fault, even if it is your genes, people with fat genes can get in shape just as easily as people who have skinny genes can get muscles.
ps15 0
yeah at my friends, his dad fell out and broke his mother's hip dont worry they were probably tired from lifting your sister
omglyktotally78 0
I have a theory. Maybe the people who are mad that all these fat/ugly people are bitching about their lives on FML, are just a little jealous that their little stories got published and theirs didn't? That could be part of the reason why theres so much hatred going down....but then again, this is just my theory. what do you think?
Vincenzo_fml 1
Genetics is a bullshit excuse. Both of my parents are fat, I'm not, I'm big yes, but big because I exercise regularly. The only thing your family would have to do with it is when you're growing up if your parents are fat because they eat too much, you likely will too, but that's not genetic, that's you eating too much. And for all the people calling diet, they don't work. Diets are a temporary solution that only makes things worse later. The only solution that works is a lifestyle change, more exercise, less junk food, more healthy options. Yes, this is work, depending on your situation it could be a lot of work, but is it worth it? Only you can answer that.
hellFighter 0
YDI for being fat.
pinkducttape 0
op. im sorry you had to be embarrassed. to all the other commenters - 1. yes being overwieght is unhealthy - but i doubt you are leaving rude comments because you are concerned about her or any other overwieght persons health. 2. some people have to go on steriods to lower swelling, asthma, or other health problems - this causes weight gain - im sure theres other medical reasons for weight gain. still - even if there is no health concern other than she couldnt be lifted in a chair - im sure you all have a great reason to think your opinion on someone else's body matters. its her body. she posted a fml because she was pubically humiliated for it. get off your high horse.
pinkducttape 0
oh and vincenzo - genetics dont give you a 100% you will turn out this way - theres a little thing called recessive genes. so yes you can have fat parents and not necessarily turn out fat - you just beat a higher percentage of being so. however for an example - take the Swedes or Norwegians - they are going to be bigger - not necessarily fatter - but bigger - because of - get this - genetics. so yes genetics can effect how much you weigh.
TBD3 0
Isn't there a different name for it if it is a girl? I thought there was, but I'm not Jewish so I wouldn't really know.