Today, my mother opened her birthday gift in front of my entire family. Two days ago, I ordered an essential oil diffuser and flesh light from Amazon. Guess which one she got? FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom lit a candle in our living room, telling the family how much she loved it. She then went on the tell us that my dad got it for her and it must have been some cheap candle. I bought the candle as a gift for her on her birthday. FML
Today, I received the 'special' present my mother had sent me for my 21st birthday. I opened the box and saw that my mother had picked out, accessorized and shipped to me, in college, a doll. FML
Today, I bought my mom a gift certificate for a spa treatment for two so we could spend some quality time together. She took my sister. FML
Today, my mom was feeling down, so I decided to buy her a gift. Knowing she likes lighthouses, I bought her a tiny one that plugs in and lights up. I brought it home, plugged it in, and when she saw me with it, she said, "Wipe that smirk off your face and get that junk out of here." FML
Today, after lecturing my daughter about being responsible with her money, she got a package from Amazon. What was in it? A lamp shaped like toast. She already has a lamp. FML
Today, was my mom's birthday. I recently got my first job, thanks to her, and could finally afford to buy her something nice. I spent my first paycheck ever on buying her a very nice bracelet. She said it was nice, then asked if I would mind if she exchanged it for one she actually liked. FML
Today, for my mom's birthday, I couldn't figure out what to get her, so I just took some of her jewelry, wrapped it up, and re-gifted it. She recognized it instantly. FML
Today, I learned that my mom's laptop was originally my Christmas gift. She opened it and decided she liked it so much she should have it. I got hot rollers. FML
Today, I opened my Father's Day present from my mother-in-law. It was a glamor shot of her. FML
Today, my mother scolded me for having a lighter in my room. My reason I had it? The candle that she bought me for my 25th birthday. I don't even live with her anymore, she showed up uninvited, and started going through my stuff. FML
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Top comments
BurnInDemonFire 39
Probable reaction: Mom was weirded out, some relatives called you gross, others mocked you. Reaction I wish happened: Mom laughed, said she was keeping it, and now your bedroom smells of lavender while you jack off into a sock.
samomaha 17
Sorry, OP, you really should have known better than to have Amazon send the present direct. When ordering adult toys, always have the shipment sent to you and then you can split it up and wrap the gift meant for someone else. Have to say YDI on this one.
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Comments (10)
BurnInDemonFire 39
Probable reaction: Mom was weirded out, some relatives called you gross, others mocked you. Reaction I wish happened: Mom laughed, said she was keeping it, and now your bedroom smells of lavender while you jack off into a sock.
samomaha 17
Sorry, OP, you really should have known better than to have Amazon send the present direct. When ordering adult toys, always have the shipment sent to you and then you can split it up and wrap the gift meant for someone else. Have to say YDI on this one.
mushman 15
Why would you buy your Mom a flesh light? Don't think she would have much use for it.
1gullible_bugger 34
Ha!
CFSH01 11
Because god forbid people actually check their packages
Ella_fml 17
Just say amazon sent you the wrong thing and you got her something else. I've ordered a textbook from them and received a kid's dinosaur book before, so it's not that unbelievable ;P
Takegami 22
Gg no re
BurnInDemonFire 39
The ****?
MaleficusTheUnsung 16
Going out on a limb here but seems fake if not extremely irresponsible and immature first thing you’d expect in such a situation if ever to happen even would be to have a talk with the individual and a extensive apology not post about it on the internet under anonymous looking for sympathy yet it was at least 50% on you to check your stuff first borderline sounds like you yourself don’t even care if this really did happen, and with that said did amazon wrap both gifts for you then play a game of shuffle the presents and give them both to your mom? XD Or did you wrap it yourself and hope the paper would distract them from the flashlight when they unwrapped it? yeah lol fake try again with less plot holes plez : S