Today, my mom said my boobs are finally getting bigger and that I've finally hit puberty. I'll be celebrating my 31st birthday next week. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I told my mom I was excited my boobs were getting bigger. She told me that that's what happens when you get fat. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My mom got me a gym membership and a bunch of clothes that are a few sizes too small. FML
Today, I noticed that I have gained enough weight to give me back boobs. FML
Today, I went swimming. As I was getting out of the very crowded pool a little girl ran up to me pointed and yelled, "Mommy, I want big boobies like that when I grow up." I'm 16. I'm a boy. FML
Today, I woke up to find my parents singing "Happy birthday" with lots of hugs and kisses. My birthday is next week. FML
Today, I turned 37. My acne turned 24, my eating disorder 22, my chronic digestive issues 35 and my insomnia 16. My boobs, on the other hand, look like they just turned 60. FML
Today, I turned 30. I still can't grow any facial hair. FML
Today, I told my mom I was going through a growth spurt. She said, "Yeah, horizontally." FML
Today, more time goes by, more I’m going to have to accept that my 13 year-old sister is going to end up with size DD boobs, possibly even bigger, meanwhile I'm turning 25 this year and my boobs are stubbornly stuck at a B. Life ain’t fair. FML
Today, on my birthday, my mother described my birth like a large, painful bowel movement in front of all my friends. FML
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Top comments
Unlovable_Me 14
You must be a real life version of 13 going on 30
TMO2142 25
Well... happy birthday
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Comments (47)
Fmlih8itrn 6
Thats quite funny
Becca34 31
At least it's happening now
Phantom425 11
Wakes up the next morning, "ITS HAPPENING!"
Unlovable_Me 14
You must be a real life version of 13 going on 30
ShleeG 23
Better late than never
anthonydpalm 18
Don't worry OP, Justin Bieber didn't hit puberty until the age of 20 and he's a millionaire! Chin up!
TheLadyOpal 30
I don't think I'd want my mom commenting on my boobs at any age.
SmittyJA24 26
A lesson I got from my dad & have passed along to my sons: judge a woman by the size of her heart, not the size of her ****.
Xx_Slayer_xX 22
Should have followed up with.. "...but no one listens to him."
OlRed 28
I think we are missing a quintessential part of the female anatomy ...Which also doesn't really matter.
TMO2142 25
Well... happy birthday
lexos 16
Don't worry about it, it's not the size that makes boobs beautiful it's the shape.
domolovesyoshi 33
Perfectly shallow and pathetic
lexos 16
And why is that?
bickdig69 8
Why is this getting dislikes tbh i think thats funny af
G6Fari 18
Once one person dislikes and that minus one shows up, everyone just feels compelled to make that negative number grow