Today, my cousin got married. I was cold so I went to get my jacket from my car. While leaving I saw my cousin walking around the front of the venue. I told her she looked beautiful in her dress. She looked up and said, "Where is my beer, have you seen my beer?" and threw up on me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to my fiance's cousin's wedding with him. I got drunk and danced like a stripper in front of his entire extended family, who I'd just met that day. FML
Today, I realized my cousin is an asshole. A cousin that I was close to who got engaged. I was excited to be part of her wedding day, since she was a big part of mine. Months later, on Instagram, she was sharing reels from her bachelorette party. When I asked her why she didn't invite me, she said she forgot. FML
Today, I went to my cousin's wedding. The groom walked over when the two of us were talking, took one good look at me, slapped me on the ass, and said, "You know, if I wasn't marrying Rose here, you'd be next." Yeah, about that: I'm a 16-year old guy. FML
Today, I was hungover the day of my cousin's wedding and fell asleep in the limo. I woke up to everyone telling me we had arrived, so I got out and started mingling. It took me a minute to realise I didn’t know anyone. Those bastards had dropped me at someone else’s wedding as a prank and drove off. FML
Today, I walked down the aisle when a bug flew into my mouth. In a response, I threw up on my beautiful white wedding dress. I had to party and be in the pictures in someones spare pink dress for the rest of the day. FML
Today, I gave a toast at my friend's wedding. When I said, "Everybody raise your glasses," an industrial fan went off and blew my dress over my head. Now, people won't stop talking about how my "blue granny panties" didn't match my dress. FML
Today, I gave a toast at my close friend's wedding. The bride's little cousin snuck up behind me and unzipped my dress. As I ended my speech with, "To a night we will never forget!", my dress fell all the way down. I was quick. People's phones were quicker. Well, they won't forget my undies. FML
Today, I congratulated a bride standing in front of a church in a white dress. Turns out she'd been stood up at the altar. She thrashed me with her bouquet. FML
Today, I bought my wedding dress and sat it on the bed while I went to buy matching shoes. When I came home, I saw my soon to be husband on the bed sitting next to my wedding dress. Turns out he spilt Coca-Cola on the dress and was trying to get it out with carpet cleanser. FML
Today, I was at a wedding reception. Everyone got offended when I threw my hands up and backed off to avoid catching the garter and let the two guys on either side fight for it. Nothing but laughs for the cousin who grabbed the bouquet out of someone else's hand and punched her, though. FML
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Top comments
Deweyboy 10
Where could something that horrible happen? *checks location* ...figures.
Noelletakumi 36
Well, that's one thing to remember the occasion by. FYL, OP.
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Comments (30)
horneyhic 15
Brides perogitve
Noelletakumi 36
Well, that's one thing to remember the occasion by. FYL, OP.
Deweyboy 10
Where could something that horrible happen? *checks location* ...figures.
friedpwnadge 25
We also have alligator wrestling and druggies eating faces. Come down anytime.
thecitizen 15
Yeah, #15 is right. It's great down here!
magicviper1 15
how do you find the location in the new update?
Dale_shackleford 13
Florida has everything bad. Alligators, swamps, spiders, old people, drugs, humidity, idiots, and Marco Rubio
IAm123 24
#17 I've also been trying to figure out how to see the gender and location in this new update. Does it even show?
MikaykayUnicorn 36
#17 They are probably on the website and not the app. I don't think there is a way to find gender and location on the app, which is really frustrating.
Comrox 19
23 and 26, I'm using the app right now and can see that the OP is posting from Florida. The location is posted right next to "Published on..."
laurenswims13 24
I can't even disagree with that...Florida has some interesting people.
Xandrick 22
As a Floridian, I cannot disagree with your comment. Hell, we have our own category in Fark news. If that doesn't say something, I don't know what does.
emeraldisle 30
Looks like someone started the party a little early.
Stazza11 27
Why not? I mean she just sold her soul.
megzaros 13
Sounds like a memorable wedding day for her lmao. Did she pay for dry cleaning?
fleur_de_fevrier_fml 23
Pure class...
tbro47 23
She probably drank a little to calm her nerves. It's not unheard of, though it seems she drank just a tad too much .
TheCurvyGamer 17
Some people get drunk at weddings. You're just gonna have to beer with it.
aliciousness116 16
A day you'll both remember. :P
breeash77 1
Well that's never pleasant..