Today, my little sister complained about a young boy in her class always pulling her hair. She asked when boys will stop doing it. My mom replied, "They won't, even when they're grown-ups," then looked over at my dad and shared a dirty smirk. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, at work, a little girl was misbehaving. Her dad told her that she would look like me when she grows up. The little girl look horrified while Daddy laughed and kept reassuring her he was "just kidding." FML
Today, my little brother grabbed my boobs and wouldn't let go until I pried his hands off. When I told my mom, her response was, "Get over it. He's a little kid who doesn't know any better." He's 14 years-old. FML
Today, I was teasing my 6-year-old sister about having a boyfriend. I asked her, "Did he take his shirt off?" She promptly said no. A few minutes later, she said, "But he did take his pants off." I then asked why. She said, "To show me his penis." FML
Today, my daughter asked me to get her razors. When my 19-year-old son saw them he asked what they were for, to which my daughter replied, "For my armpits." My son then said, "Girls don't grow armpit hair." FML
Today, my mother was scolding my youngest sister for having unprotected sex with yet another partner. She continued with, "Why can't you be like your brother and just never have sex?" I'm 22, and she's not wrong. FML
Today, I found out from her teacher that my daughter in kindergarten gets the little boys in her class to play grown-ups with her. It's basically dry humping and groaning. FML
Today, my 6-year-old son was being charming by smiling and batting his eyelashes at me. When I asked him, "What?" he replied, "When you die, can I have your hair?" FML
Today, I got out of the shower and my 3 year old sister comes into the bathroom and says "I want big boobies like yours when I grow up." And from the other room I hear my dad go "Sweetie, you've already got bigger boobs than your sister." FML
Today, I was having lunch with my sister and my mother. While my mom was busy ordering food, my sister said to me, "Look at this!" then contorted her face so that she had a double chin. My mother looked over and said to her, "Stop making fun of your sister!" FML
Today, my son trained his little sister to walk up to strangers and whimper: "My mommy punches me." FML
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Top comments
feven 32
Parents think they're so slick. Kids understand the dirty jokes by age 12 thank you and please stop
brunettesara5722 17
Lol fyl op, it can be worse though. at least you didn't walk in on it?
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Comments (62)
zanoty 17
Quick think of a funny comment u can be first uh uh "first"
ChatAlors_fml 16
Still waiting for the time people get that the FML community hates "first" comments
DoomSkuller 28
I think Zanoty was poking fun at all the people who scream "first"
then000bster 16
Maybe OP should be first, that way no one can have it.
rjc490 29
You'll still be having fun when you're older too!
DarksideDoll 31
Damn right! This is the best FML I've read in a while. Whilst hearing that from your folks isn't favourable, it's much better than fighting, bickering, or a number of other things.
Abhinow 7
you should be proud OP. u have smart parents who know how to joke
Crazyjohnb 23
It's just something they learned from 50 Shades of Grey.
iTzSelverZz 14
Boys will be boys.
mjmpink88 5
Please that is not an ok thing to say ever
Jinxsie 27
And those boys will grow up to be men. Single men, possibly not worthy of any girl. I'm guessing you're one of them...
tdawg91 17
That's a pretty shit saying. You're just teaching boys at their most impressionable age that it's OK to disrespect and harm women instead of teaching them that their actions are wrong
Denny1988 19
He isn't referring to woman abuse, so woman like to have their hair pulled or ass spanked during sex, they just like that bit of aggression with some passion
MehNameIsJuan 15
3, another downvoted comment...Your doing great!
greeneyedx 23
Just no. It's a shit saying that justifies whatever crap little boys like to pull, whether it's just getting in trouble in general or disrespecting a little girl.
brunettesara5722 17
Lol fyl op, it can be worse though. at least you didn't walk in on it?
SS99_fml 20
I can ride my bike with no handlebars.
fuckedPriceless 17
I keep rhythm with no metronome
Lizardgirl 7
I can split the atom of a molecule
1dvs_bstd 41
#5 wow, such a badass. But I'm pretty badass myself. I eat cereal without milk.
SystemofaBlink41 27
I eat milk without cereal.
Leenah_93 11
#54 You "drink" milk, not eat it. -_-
Gemma_Mansonite 20
The joke flew straight over your head @58 -_-
Jinxsie 27
Great job ruining the fun, 58.
redstone7693 29
Oh yeah tough guy? well I can sleep with my eyes closed
PotatoesAndCake 26
I can run with my legs
Sneado 20
Boys won't stop. Men will.
militarybrat 21
You dont get it do you...
gatekeeper1993 10
Yeah she was talking about hair pulling during sex hun. that's why they exchanged glances
feven 32
Parents think they're so slick. Kids understand the dirty jokes by age 12 thank you and please stop
Pauline96_fml 20
What's worse is when they know damn well that you understand the jokes and start making them in front of you on purpose just to gross you out
haileyrows 26
"Boys will be boys" is never a good reason. There's no reason anyone, female or male, should put up with harassment.
potato63 10
I think your looking to much into this, by my guess the kids are probably in pre k or first grade, around there. You assigning a criminal charge to a kid just being a kid. She didn't complain that it hurt or that it was violent it was just a kid pulling her hair, it happens at every school on every playground it's just how kids grow up,
jackien1 6
That's ridiculous. Standing by the statements 'boys will be boys' and 'they're just kids' will only further cement into place the patriarchy and sexism that still (really ******* insanely) exists in this day and age. It's because of people like you that domestic abuse is still happening and women have to fight for feminism (even though, you know, it's basically equality.)
AlaskanChild 10
29 must be what it looks like when people from Tumblr go on to other websites.
Lizardgirl 7
Oh great the tumblr crazies are starting to spill into other websites
DoomedGemini 38
The thing is it everyone gets that talking to. A comment mentioned the whole "boys will be boys" which just excuses actions. I had a boy in kindergarten who kept pulling my hair and most people just laughed or said "he likes you!" Instead of doing anything to help.
Vegetarian27 24
Girls are told that when a boy is mean he likes you, and then when we're older we're asked why we like guys who don't treat us well, or the bad boys. *rolls eyes*
Miss_Chevious 37
they shared a dirty smirk? how did YOU understand the dirty reference?
150493x 29
I think it would be pretty hard not to pick up on that.
grogers311 20
I think dad got pretty hard when he picked up on that...
vikky538 29
oh that look...I remember that now....