Today, my last task for the day as a high school janitor was to power-wash the concrete area where the graduation ceremony will take place. Tired and bored, I drew a huge penis with the power hose. Right before I was going to wash it off, the machine broke. Graduation is tomorrow. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I started my job as a high school janitor. A student decided to welcome me by taking a dump in the urinal. FML
Today, I saw some pretty heinous graffiti on the urinal stall at school, so I opted to scribble it out. A supervisor came in the second the pen touched the stall. Now I have detention and have to scrub the entire stall clean as a "lesson". FML
Live Laugh Love
Today, while at work, I saw a kid empty his bladder all over the floor. His mother walked over, looked at me, said, "Yep… that just happened," and dragged him away. I'm a 30-year-old man, four credits shy of a Master's, stuck cleaning up piss at a dead-end job. FML
Today, I'm a janitor at a middle school. Someone took a poo and placed it on the sink. FML
The art, the artist
Today, we were having a family get together at my house. Because of this, I had to mow our lawn to make sure it looked nice. I got a little bored and decided it would be funny to cut a rather large penis into my yard. Right when I'd finished, I ran out of gas. My 83 year-old grandmother saw. FML
Not my problem
Today, someone (we don't know who) put a very massive and noticeable graffiti "mural" in the bathroom at my workplace. Guess who's job it was to clean it? If you said me, you'd be wrong. However, the guy whose job it was got distracted and didn't do it, so it became my job after all. FML
Mystery unwanted gift
Today, I came back from school camp and really had to go to the toilet. I ran to the nearest one, which was by the principal's office. After I finished, I tried to flush the button. Turns out the water was turned off so it wouldn't flush. I bolted. The principal is now stuck with my unwanted present. FML
Pranked
Today, my friend made the effort to draw a penis on every page in my analysis textbook in pen. I have to return this tomorrow. FML
Today, I fell asleep at work and woke up with penis sharpied on my face. I'm a kindergarten teacher. FML
Today, as I stopped at a traffic light, I noticed the man in the car next to me break out in laughter. I pulled over later on to see that someone had drawn a large penis on the side of my van. I then spent all my morning cleaning it off. I went outside later only to see someone had redrawn it. FML
Top comments
dianeface 0
Trust me, the high school kids will think its hilarious.
This_Guy 0
Just tell them that you actually did your job, but some kids drew that when you left.
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Comments (261)
fallingforever_fml 0
MARRY ME PLEASE .
drmmer33 0
thats downright amazing. the same thing happened at my high school for our senior prank. its hilarious.
swimdudeno1 0
I wish you were my old high school's janitor.
whatever6 0
omg why the hell would you do such a stupid thing? but you know i don't think any of the guys will mind they probably think it's very funny
CBeans37 0
that is the best thing ever. i wish there was a huge piece under where my graduation was hahah
Amkii 0
lol That is hilarious, though. The students will love it! But if you drew it with a power hose... is that not water? Won't it dry?
bobertnoodle 0
Oh, I never heard that one before.
DamnAshleyyy 0
Haha. This is just like the one where the guy is mowing someone elses lawn and decides to make it into a shape of a penis first. Then right after his lawn mower dies.
Agrajagged 3
3===============D I even draw penises on the interweb!
resident_fml 0
Why draw penises when you're bored? Because they're penises! Duh. What would you otherwise draw when you're bored? Also, I'd much rather have cool janitors with a sense of humor like this guy as a friend than stuck-up snots like you commentors whining about how childish he is.