Today, my last task for the day as a high school janitor was to power-wash the concrete area where the graduation ceremony will take place. Tired and bored, I drew a huge penis with the power hose. Right before I was going to wash it off, the machine broke. Graduation is tomorrow. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I started my job as a high school janitor. A student decided to welcome me by taking a dump in the urinal. FML
Today, I saw some pretty heinous graffiti on the urinal stall at school, so I opted to scribble it out. A supervisor came in the second the pen touched the stall. Now I have detention and have to scrub the entire stall clean as a "lesson". FML
Today, while at work, I saw a kid empty his bladder all over the floor. His mother walked over, looked at me, said, "Yep… that just happened," and dragged him away. I'm a 30-year-old man, four credits shy of a Master's, stuck cleaning up piss at a dead-end job. FML
Today, I'm a janitor at a middle school. Someone took a poo and placed it on the sink. FML
Today, we were having a family get together at my house. Because of this, I had to mow our lawn to make sure it looked nice. I got a little bored and decided it would be funny to cut a rather large penis into my yard. Right when I'd finished, I ran out of gas. My 83 year-old grandmother saw. FML
Today, someone (we don't know who) put a very massive and noticeable graffiti "mural" in the bathroom at my workplace. Guess who's job it was to clean it? If you said me, you'd be wrong. However, the guy whose job it was got distracted and didn't do it, so it became my job after all. FML
Today, I came back from school camp and really had to go to the toilet. I ran to the nearest one, which was by the principal's office. After I finished, I tried to flush the button. Turns out the water was turned off so it wouldn't flush. I bolted. The principal is now stuck with my unwanted present. FML
Today, my friend made the effort to draw a penis on every page in my analysis textbook in pen. I have to return this tomorrow. FML
Today, I fell asleep at work and woke up with penis sharpied on my face. I'm a kindergarten teacher. FML
Today, as I stopped at a traffic light, I noticed the man in the car next to me break out in laughter. I pulled over later on to see that someone had drawn a large penis on the side of my van. I then spent all my morning cleaning it off. I went outside later only to see someone had redrawn it. FML
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Top comments
dianeface 0
Trust me, the high school kids will think its hilarious.
This_Guy 0
Just tell them that you actually did your job, but some kids drew that when you left.
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Comments (261)
cheesyd0nut 0
This is beautiful. I'm sure if you leave it there the high school kids will add to it. maybe some pubes or cum
derriduh 0
That is possibly the only thing that will make their ceremony fun and memorable. I'm sorry if it screwed your job, but in a few months I hope it's funny.
Triple4 0
omg i would love to see that if i was at my graduation, one more year!
Sheleigh 7
Um, the water will dry before tomorrow. No one will even see it!
chunkofchange 0
what is with men and their fascination of drawing penises? :
Cheezits55 0
i dont think this is real...everyone knows that janitors dont know how to use a computer
skintay 0
If it turns out a student gets blamed, this can very quickly turn into a LML...
jessxoxo28 5
lol!!! the kids r gonna love this but isnt it water? i think it'll dry by tomorrow
lalosaa 0
hahahahahah this is actually hilarious. I was laughing for a whole two minutes there, practically falling off the bed. hahaha, FYL for the drawing, it's your own fault. But, don't worry, the kids will love it!
reetah 0
Someone PLEASE explain to me why every guy feels the need to draw a penis on every available surface?