Today, my last task for the day as a high school janitor was to power-wash the concrete area where the graduation ceremony will take place. Tired and bored, I drew a huge penis with the power hose. Right before I was going to wash it off, the machine broke. Graduation is tomorrow. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I started my job as a high school janitor. A student decided to welcome me by taking a dump in the urinal. FML
Today, I saw some pretty heinous graffiti on the urinal stall at school, so I opted to scribble it out. A supervisor came in the second the pen touched the stall. Now I have detention and have to scrub the entire stall clean as a "lesson". FML
Today, while at work, I saw a kid empty his bladder all over the floor. His mother walked over, looked at me, said, "Yep… that just happened," and dragged him away. I'm a 30-year-old man, four credits shy of a Master's, stuck cleaning up piss at a dead-end job. FML
Today, I'm a janitor at a middle school. Someone took a poo and placed it on the sink. FML
Today, we were having a family get together at my house. Because of this, I had to mow our lawn to make sure it looked nice. I got a little bored and decided it would be funny to cut a rather large penis into my yard. Right when I'd finished, I ran out of gas. My 83 year-old grandmother saw. FML
Today, someone (we don't know who) put a very massive and noticeable graffiti "mural" in the bathroom at my workplace. Guess who's job it was to clean it? If you said me, you'd be wrong. However, the guy whose job it was got distracted and didn't do it, so it became my job after all. FML
Today, I came back from school camp and really had to go to the toilet. I ran to the nearest one, which was by the principal's office. After I finished, I tried to flush the button. Turns out the water was turned off so it wouldn't flush. I bolted. The principal is now stuck with my unwanted present. FML
Today, my friend made the effort to draw a penis on every page in my analysis textbook in pen. I have to return this tomorrow. FML
Today, I fell asleep at work and woke up with penis sharpied on my face. I'm a kindergarten teacher. FML
Today, as I stopped at a traffic light, I noticed the man in the car next to me break out in laughter. I pulled over later on to see that someone had drawn a large penis on the side of my van. I then spent all my morning cleaning it off. I went outside later only to see someone had redrawn it. FML
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Top comments
dianeface 0
Trust me, the high school kids will think its hilarious.
This_Guy 0
Just tell them that you actually did your job, but some kids drew that when you left.
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Comments (261)
FukedOver 0
That's pure win OP I'd love to graduate on a giant penis! That would be hilarious and epic! and if the principal or any of the teachers ask it was a senior prank. The kids will think you're a legend dude. Not an FML, just pure WIN.
a420_ 0
awesome lol
sheissoamaZING 0
If I was in that graduating class I probably would've laughed. The only people who will probably be mad would be the staff and some parents. My parents would've probably laughed too though. LoL.
UConn_Huskies 0
what you may not realize is that power washers spray water. water dries quickly on concrete in the spring and summer months. Its not like you used spray paint or anything crazy, the water will dry up in like an hour... I seriously can't believe you thought it would stay there for more then a day. You are retarded.
abianco13 0
I think that is hilarious. If i were you i wouldn't worry about it. My 8th grade graduation is soon and i wish my janitor would do that. FYL
Dead_and_Gone 0
U will be legend.....
cal27 0
WAOW U R AL SO ARTARTEFIDE! Water EVAPORATES. POWER washers spray WATER. THEREFORE, marks made with a POWER washer will OBVIOUSLY evaporate because, srsly, water evaporates. Enjoy knowing this little known fact that could not have possibly been taken into account by anybody else.
ShadowMystika 0
Hm. Pretty sure I've heard something exactly like this before. And another time before that. And another. Stop making up stupid shit like this for goodness' sake. It'll evaporate, the kids will appreciate it, and they will be the ones who are blamed. Your life is not ******.
george1124 0
ahahahahahahahahah!!! thats awesome!
MDRustInPeace 0
That's awesome. And it's probably better than any prank the students themselves could think of, hell, maybe they'll get blamed