Today, my job application got denied once again. I looked over it, and saw that my roommate added "screwing over customers" and "hiding dead bodies" under my skills. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my job application for McDonald's was rejected. This is the second time. FML
Today, I applied for a job as a dishwasher. I was denied because I don't have enough experience. FML
Today, I applied for a new job as a maintenance technician. About 10 minutes after submitting my resume, I received a rejection letter. My girlfriend is their HR person. FML
Today, I was forced to write a job application letter that boils down to, "I can't do this job, please don't hire me." FML
Today, my time-off request was denied because I'd said on my application that I have “open availability.” This is normally true, except my mother passed away and I need to travel to go to her funeral. I attempted to appeal, but ended up fired for “misleading” the company by “lying on a job application.” FML
Today, I received a series of rejection letters from jobs, one after the other. Last night, I stayed up into the wee morning hours to apply to campus jobs I'm not qualified for, because I was classified as a part-time student due to an administrative error. FML
Today, I spent two hours filling out an online application and questionnaire for a potential employer. The application stated that there were no right or wrong answers and to answer truthfully. I was automatically rejected. FML
Today, we are severely understaffed, and I'm very often the only person working my shift. There's a yuppie who comes in and complains when we have to pause service due to shift change. He does this every day, and I'd had enough, so I slid him an application ,and told him to fill it out, wait, or leave. I got written up. FML
Today, I discovered that I needed to reapply for my job in order to have a chance at keeping it. The applications closed yesterday. FML
Today, my sister felt guilty and told me about the changes she secretly made to my résumé months ago. She'd put "doing your mom" and "corporate espionage" as my hobbies, and "Justin Bieber's pussy waxer" as a previous job. No wonder I'm still unemployed. FML
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Top comments
underthesea12 24
why didn't you look at it before?
Pleonasm 36
Start applying in the cartel?
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Comments (82)
JMichael 26
You'd think he'd want you to have a job. So you could pay your half of the bills
FrankHotpants 31
Seems kind of stupid for a roommate not to want you to have a job. They must enjoy paying the bills.
perdix 31
Send in that application to AT&T and the cable companies. You'll probably skip right over entry-level jobs and go straight to upper management!
DotDootyDot 17
I don't understand why there are people who think it's funny to mess up with a friend's CV, specially when they know that friend needs a job. Sure, you should always check your CV to make sure all of the information written in it is correct, but one cannot always predict that a so called friend will be a douchebag and ruin their possibility of having a successful job interview. FYL!
djPanda 8
I'm sensing your future career will be gta
perdix 31
Make sure you show up for your interview with your pants unzipped and carrying a shovel. You can't let them think you padded your résumé with idle boasts.
starfish7 18
I guess he doesn't mind paying the rent all by himself, then.
TheSofaKing 7
Return the favor on his resumes.
RedPillSucks 33
Let the beat down commence!!
sanecatlady 13
Maybe you should start living up to your job application by hiding the body of your roommate. :)