Anonymous
Australia
Today, my husband decided it was time to tell me he had a 3 year old son. We have been married for 5 years. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
MIA
Today, on Maury…
Today, my husband of four years finally told me he has an eight-year-old son. FML
Anonymous
Atlanta, United States
Are you my new mommy?
Today, I found out that my boyfriend of six years has a five year-old daughter. FML
Erbtosis
This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff
Seattle, United States
So brave
Today, my five year-old had to break the news to me that my husband was leaving me for someone else. FML
Anonymous
Calgary, Canada
Today, my husband of 3 years learned that he's going to be a father. No, I'm not pregnant. FML
Marcella
United States
Today, my fiance told me he thought it was time that we started to see other people. I'm six months pregnant with his baby. FML
Anonymous
Kansas City, United States
Today, my father-in-law is still introducing me to family friends as his son's girlfriend. I have been married to his son for 5 years, we have a child together and another on the way. FML
unluckyinlove
Ridgehaven, Australia
All over the place
Today, I found out my boyfriend of 5 years cheated on me and now has a 4 year old, and as he’s told me, we should get married. FML
rissa5214
Stoughton, United States
Today, I told my boyfriend of three years that I wanted to get married and have a child within the next five years. He responded by packing up my things and showing me the door. FML
Jessica
United Kingdom
Today, I found out who the father of my sister's 4 year old son is. My husband of 7 years. FML
Anonymous
Too late
Today, my husband told me he'd changed his mind and no longer wants children. We already have two kids. FML
Top comments
HarlequinHatter 0
Jon and Nancy sittin' in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G. First comes love, then comes marriage Then comes someone else's baby in the carriage! Nancy leaves Jon and takes the tree D-I-V-O-R-C-E
KillU2009 0
time for someone to die.
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Comments (131)
Intoxicunt 6
Is that a nice way of calling me a ****? >_> Yeah, at least now with the clones, I don't have to do all the work myself.
Intoxicunt 6
I would never ignore you, Alan. You're awesome. :) Haha, "here for the ride". Well, it's a good ride. Or so I've heard. Amnesia...
plexico 4
What's the problem? You've got a kid and no stretch marks. Sounds win-win to me! :)
Intoxicunt 6
She has a screaming kid without the fabulous, frequent sex to make it. Sounds lose-lose to me.
decoybag 0
LOL so true #21!
plexico 4
Toxi, #21, You can have plenty of fabulous sex even when procreation is not the goal. Actually, having sex with the explicit goal of making babies can be somewhat less fun and more pressurized than the recreational type. When we get to the Plexi-plex, it's all gonna be for fun and "que sera, sera." The babies will happen when they happen, but the party will be ongoing!
Intoxicunt 6
I just saw plexico's #46. It wasn't showing up before. Anyway, sure it's fun without trying to procreate, but the goal is a good excuse to do it more often. When we get to the plexi-plex, will you cook for us and teach me awesome things? I like the idea of it being no-pressure, but I'm the most incredibly fertile person I know. I'll make the entire master race within a few years!
proud_liberal 0
I bet ur husband is a republican, you don't see liberals doing stuff like this.
decoybag 0
Funny, because I always see REPUBLICANS in various sex scandals.....hmmmmmmm......
Intoxicunt 6
#26 is right, but dude, sex and douchebaggery has nothing to do with your freakin' political party!
itsalwaysfunny 0
Really? is that why John Edwards ****** his mistress and got her pregnant while his wife was undergoing Intense chemotherapy? I don't know about you, but I've never heard of a republican sex scandal so disgusting.
Intoxicunt 6
Good job. Feed the troll. Give him/her a ******* feast. Let's start a political war on an FML about a cheating spouse! Yeah. -_-
Intoxicunt 6
Hahaha. I agree. It's pretty awesome.
plexico 4
itsalwaysfunny, I believe John Edwards was having his affair with his mistress while Elizabeth was in remission. I may be in the minority, but I think it is total bullshit that we disqualify politicians for their sex lives. You have to have a ******* screw loose to do that job, so if you have an out-sized libido, that's part of the package. If you are good at that high-pressure, (relatively) low-paying job, then go ahead and hump whatever consenting adult you can. No doinking the lobbyists, Sen. McCain, because that's not sex, it's corruption.
Intoxicunt 6
I agree with plexi, but all that got deleted due to it being troll feeding, and the fact that "this is no place for a political debate" as Alan said.
Intoxicunt 6
Don't faint! I could get at least 3 1/2 people to agree with me without coercing any of them!
Intoxicunt 6
Woohoo! ALAN. Hey, Alan! HEYYY! Guess what. Look down. On the screen. See proud_liberal? That is a troll. He/she is posting racist nonsense on most of the FMLs. Is there something we can do about this?
Intoxicunt 6
Yay. :)
bcopeland 0
smack!!! that hurts
proud_liberal 0
wow republicans are censoring me. aren't they the ones always screaming about free speech?
Intoxicunt 6
1- You don't know everyone's political party on here. A good number of the people here aren't even from the old USA. 2- This isn't Freespeech.com. It's a humorous website.
NobodyUKnow 0
if this is true, this sucks :( I hate myself