Today, my girlfriend threw me on the couch as I walked in the door. I butt dialed my mom in the process. My girlfriend took off my pants and we got to business. After about 30 seconds of hearing what was going on, my mom thought something was wrong and called the cops to my apartment. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, me and my girlfriend were getting at it, and then my parents came home. I heard them and we scrambled to get our clothes on. My dad came into the room and found me wearing her pants inside out with her thong around my legs. FML
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend at her house. When things started heating up, I heard the front door open and my girlfriend said that it must be her Dad. She handed me my clothes, pushed me out the window, and told me to knock at the front door. Her Dad answered, holding my shoes. FML
Today, I went for a run. When I got home, no one was there so I took off my clothes and laid on the cool wood floor. I decided to call my girlfriend and we started talking in baby voices. That's when my mom walked into the house witnessing everything. FML
Today, I brought my girlfriend home while my parents were at work, and things got a little heated. We lost track of time, because the next thing we knew, my dad burst into the living room. He doubled over laughing and asked how much I paid her. FML
Today, my girlfriend called me and asked me if I wanted to have phone sex with her. We got into it. It took us 13 minutes to figure out my mom had been on the other line the whole time. FML
Today, my mom walked in on me and my girlfriend having sex. Later, police turned up because mom thought she was underage. I had to desperately prove to some very angry officers that I met my girlfriend at university, and she’s almost a year older than I am. FML
Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. It was just me and her. Things began to get heated, and we started doing it on the living room couch. Near the end of it, I whispered in her ear, "Who's your daddy?" I then heard behind me, "I am." FML
Today, I was at my girlfriend's house, and she was tickling me. It got a bit rough, and she fell out of bed and hit the floor. Her parents, thinking we'd been fighting, burst into the room to see her holding her bloody nose. She didn't say anything while her dad kicked my ass. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. My phone started ringing and it was my Mom, she said I could answer it. As I answered the phone my girlfriend started playing with my dick. I moaned. Loud. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were in the mood for something different. So we decided to have sex in the shower. When we were finished I heard a voice outside the door asking if we needed a towel. It was my mother. FML
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Top comments
lexiBRo 0
hehehe.... hope it was good.. what did you tell your mom the next time you two spoke and she asked what happened that day??
UFCFIGHTER 0
**** blocked by your mom lol
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Comments (99)
sharkshaveteeth 0
I like the OP's user name! ;-). FYL indeed! at least the cops hopefully got a laugh out of the situation!
sharkshaveteeth 0
Love your username OP! ;-). that is hilarious, but sucks for you! I hope that the cops could laugh about it at least!
SusanaSaysRawrxD 0
Lmfao! XD that's like that 'no buttdialing' commercial x_x get a blackberry xD or an iPhone. :D buttdialing' shall dieeee!
ccreel6800 0
are you sure she didn't call the police just to give you a hard time?
Imawhalerider 0
30 seconds and already screaming. 10000000 points
htownlove 0
soo true!
katekappy 0
wow that totaly sucks for u guys. what did u do when they showed up?
lovelykendra5 0
Sureeee
letsdothis 0
Look at it this way... at least now the cops have a interesting work related story to tell? :D
xdeathscene 0
I froze when I saw "my girlfriend threw me on the couch..." your girlfriend's a strong one, keep her... Or she'll throw you against a wall when you break up with her :P Sorry, it was a little thought I couldn't resist to say. FYL, though.
depotst 0
Who dumps a girl like that? I'll take two. -_-
meanie_monday 0
haha this brings back the question on being man handled