Today, my girlfriend found out that I secretly watch porn while she sleeps, but she seemed to be fine with it. That's until the next day, when she got on my Facebook account and publicly shared every porn page I visit. My father even commented, "Poor choice in porn, son". FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Thanks dad
Today, my dad uploaded his porn collection onto our family server. My mom was convinced I did it and sat me down for a long talk. FML
Today, I found out that my girlfriend takes videos of me sleeping and watches them with her friends. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend watches porn. Specifically, today, while I was in the shower. In the next room. We were alone in the house and he still chose porn. FML
Today, my boyfriend posted a screenshot from a porno on my Facebook, because the girl in it looked freakishly similar to me. My dad commented, asking for a link to the video. FML
Today, while on my Dad's computer, I looked through the browser history to find the name of a website I'd visited on it the other day. I soon found out he watches a staggering amount of downright frightening incest porn. I'm disturbed on so many levels. FML
Red Right Hand
Today, I came home to find my dad in my room, watching porn on my computer. When I asked him what he was doing, he closed the computer, stood up, stared at me awkwardly and then said, "You should really avoid those sites" and left my room. FML
Bobs and vagene!!
Today, I was browsing porn in my room, when my dad barged in. I quickly switched to another tab, only to see it was parked on another porn page. I had another browser window open, so I switched to that. More porn. My dad said, "Riiiggghhhttt... You need help, son." FML
Today, I decided to check my email on our family computer. Since my dad's account was already logged on, I chose to use his instead of logging on my own. When opening up a new page and seeing his recently viewed sites, I learned that he loves to watch porn. I also learned he has a foot fetish. FML
Caught in 1080p
Today, I started watching porn in my room with the volume muted. A minute later, my dad knocked on the door, so I closed everything and called him in. He just said, "Son, you disgust me." and walked out. Now I'm too paranoid to use my own computer. FML
Today, I noticed my hidden porn folder on my laptop had been renamed to "LOL". I live with my teenage daughter, and no one else. FML
Top comments
EggsinaBasket 9
A bit immature.
cmchappy 25
Best dad ever
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Comments (196)
poirot_fml 13
Women are evil creature !
EggsinaBasket 9
A bit immature.
kipperin 18
Yeah Op, you need to go on mature **** website. Stop being a pedo.
jenninator93 18
I could only justify her being upset if they live together and he doesn't attempt to have sex with her then watches **** while she sleeps instead. That is a big "if" though, kinda doubt it. She's probably nuts.
jenninator93 18
Also definitely NOT saying her actions would be justified whatsoever. Regardless of how he made her feel, that was childish and a major violation of trust.
sturschaedel 27
He obviously didn't trust her to begin with, since he was watching it secretly after she went to bed. You can't violate trust that doesn't exist. While posting those sites publicly was definitly a bitch move, he should have been open about it from the beginning of this relationship.
MrsDruidess 23
Personally I dont think people should be doing thing they are ashamed of. If you like it enough to do it, own in. I am not saying blast it from the roof tops but dont hide shit, thats when you get in trouble.
fiddlinfool 4
Meh
Hiktmae 20
I'm not pardoning her from what she did, but some girls don't appreciate their boyfriends watching ****. It has nothing to do with the actual **** it just makes them feel insecure.
incoherentrmblr 22
#76, says the person with a cartoon profile pic...
Zebediabolical 45
Any guy who says he doesn't watch **** or fantasize about other women is a liar.
Awa1nut 2
or he could have wanted to wank in private, not wanting to put sex into the relationship, which can and has caused plenty of couples to end their relationships.
Drizl 17
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
That's a good reason to break up with her.
TheGolfGTI 24
I really don't get you people. For even the smallest of things, you think the optimal solution is to ditch the person. This is a relationship. If he is going to break up with her for something as small as this, he really shouldn't be in a relationship in the first place.
Awahso 25
By her posting this she humiliated him and violated his privacy. That means she isn't trustworthy, why be with someone you cannot trust?
TheGolfGTI 24
@21 That's true. But that's simply what I think. That doesn't mean I'm right. Other people have different opinions, and that's fine.
bushwhacker274 9
It's not a small thing, what she did was a huge violation of his privacy. And if she did this as oppose to talking with him about it like an adult, it shows how immature and petty she is. It's not just the act, it's the behavior behind the act that's important as well.
Angelkisses130 26
Well personally I don't think people in a relationship should be lusting over other people. AND he kept the secret from her. Shame on him, I applaud her.
RedPillSucks 33
you applaud her for posting stuff on facebook instead of being mature and speaking to him about it in private?!! I'm not making any judgements as to whether **** is a bad thing or not, but if its an issue, you talk about it. what she did was a punk move that is a violation of trust in a relationship.
Fuaaad1994 31
To be honest OPs girlfriend sounds a bit like a psycho. If the girlfriend had a problem with it she really should have talked to op about it instead of going behind his back. Communication is key.
dolphins_penny 5
Wtf!?! My BF and I watch ****. I've never gone psycho on him and vice versa. Just because you watch **** doesn't mean you are lusting after someone. For us it gives us ideas to try......
insomnimaniak 19
I feel like since he said she found out he watches it "secretly," it leads me to believe that they already had a conversation where she said she was uncomfortable with it. If he didn't like that, then it's also up to him to open up lines of communication rather than watching it sort of behind her back. Still I'm by no means saying that her response was appropriate
Just_A_Tree 20
I would hope that this is reason enough to break up. She violated his trust, his privacy, and she wasn't mature enough to just talk about it. Regardless of wether or not **** is okay, or that he has a really poor choice in ****! That is not okay. If I were OP, I'd probably make things much worse though. Like replying to the dad's comment with "it may be a poor choice, but it's still better than her." If you're going to go down, then go down swingin!
jthmtwin 16
I feel like she should have gone to him. I personally would feel hurt if my bf went straight to **** over sex or asking for naughty pictures or something similar. But men watch it, not a big surprise there
im_a_black_guy 10
Watching **** is a taboo thing so when you're watching it, it's not gonna be something you do openly and it's not something you mention or bring up on purpose. My girl knows I watch **** and doesn't mind but i still do it secretly because, well it's private until I make it known
shanebob 15
This may be news to you #100, but women watch **** too...
Rainbow101365 5
She could ruin things like a job or college for him with stuff like this. I totally agree that she is untrustworthy and this is worth a breakup
sturschaedel 27
#47 I see nothing wrong with **** in a relationship as long as both are open about it. My hubby watches ****, I prefer erotic stories. That doesn't make our relationship any less real or honest. #108 I agree, watching ****, unless people watch it together as part of foreplay, is to be watched privatly and needn't be announced each and every time. But your girldriend knows that you watch ****. OPs girlfriend didn't know. It doesn't justify exposing him like that, but he should have been honest with her in the first place.
albertozeta_fml 9
She humiliated him in front of friends and relatives: he has the f****g right to give her a good kick in the ass.
ToxicTyrael 26
I definitely agree with #8. You can't just randomly ditch people for the slightest things and runing away from yout problems is never the solution of choice. Though this is really ****** up because once things are on the internet you can never delete them or undo the harm they've made.
snowflake_3325 7
I completely agree with you 47, he shouldn't have been lusting after anyone else while in a relationship. I'd have been pissed if I were her too! If he just wants a wank then why not use a picture of his own girl and use the bathroom - or maybe even wake the real thing up since she was right beside??
laden_swallow09 35
"Hey, babe. Wake up. WAKE UP, BABE. Hey, I'm horny. Let's ****." Genius.
fiddlinfool 4
Obviously he didn't trust her enough to share with her that he watched **** in the first place! By the way, **** ruins lives as you get older. It's harder to keep erections and ejaculate without aides.
Zebediabolical 45
#47. #133. If I'm in a relationship and have to use my own hand for relief, she doesn't get /any/ say, barring legality of course, in what images I use to get me there. If you don't want him jerking it to ****, then, well, satisfy his needs. If you can't do that, there's a bigger issue at stake. If you /won't/ do that for whatever reason, you're part of the problem that sends him to ****. And in my honest opinion,the kind of girl who'd do this is exactly the kind of girl who'd use sex as a weapon to get what she wants. OP: I won't say dump her. But I will say sit down and take a good hard look at the relationship and reevaluate if she's the one for you. This wasn't some prank. This wasn't something she did out of anger in the heat of the moment. This was cold-blooded retribution. A calculated and vicious attack designed to humiliate you in front of your friends and family, to destroy your self esteem. An attack that can have possible repercussions for the rest of your life every time you make a new friend, every time you apply for a job or a security clearance or loan. Personally, I'd very likely be done with her and walk away. If she'd done it right away, I might reconsider. But If she's willing to bide her time and think it over and make this decision over a round of solitaire with a different deck of cards, I'd be terrified of what she'd do the next time she felt like I crossed her. I'd consdier it a controlling and abusive act. And that is NEVER ok from either partner.
frenchfrywine 0
Exactly. If you have a gf why do you need to sneak around st night fantasizing about other women? She should dump you and find a real man who doesn't need to watch **** while she's next to him sleeping.
cmchappy 25
Best dad ever
coming back in the future 30
Why does OP's gf have his Facebook?
alliewillie 22
Why not? I have my boyfriend's and he has mine. We trust each other and wouldn't do anything like this.
Zebediabolical 45
If you trust each other why would you want it? I'm sure OP trusted his girl too, and we all see how that played out.
MRP360 14
well watch better ****, problem solved
sandormatyi 25
op you should ask your father for some of his favourites
GoldFishPony 21
I hope you deleted it immediately
ActionFearo 39
Or at least apologize and then post an updated list of better **** watching sites.
the_fanciest_man 15
You have a girlfriend. Why watch **** when the real thing?
the_fanciest_man 15
when you can have*
AnOriginalName 19
Because you can't have the real thing 24/7, but, as long as you have a good internet connection, **** will always be there.
makersmarkmike 17
Also his girlfriend probably does not look like a **** star
the_fanciest_man 15
Outlets are outlets, my friend.
annimal64 7
**** stars don't even look like **** stars….
kerstileann 26
how the **** does a **** star not look like a **** star?
Vestin 18
#7: That would be because sex isn't "the real thing". Masturbation and intercourse satisfy different needs, one isn't merely an inferior substitute for the other.
RedPillSucks 33
he means when you see them in real life not made up
pooldude 24
watch Don Jon for the answer to that question. seriously.
marzipanimal 15
Having a girlfriend doesn't automatically mean having sex.
the_fanciest_man 15
#85 I know there is much more to a relationship than just sex (dates, emotional support, etc.) but sex is often involved and can serve as a superior substitute to masturbation.
the_fanciest_man 15
#54 Satisfying the desire for sexual pleasure is the common goal of both masturbation and sex (unless you're looking to raise a child in the case of sex). We men can all agree sex does a better job of fulfilling the desire for sexual pleasure.
im_a_black_guy 10
Because some **** stars look like an average person and not a super sexy sex goddess.
sturschaedel 27
**** in a relationship can level out differences in the sex drive of the partners. It's a good thing, you just have to be open about it.
albertozeta_fml 9
Watching **** and have sex with your girlfriend are two different things, like watching baseball on TV with a beer and a big pack of potato chips and play baseball with friends in the old empty field behind the school. The second one is definitely healthier but from time to time watching a match on TV is not that bad at all.
morgasshk 14
1. **** does not say no. 2. **** does not get headaches 3. **** does not have period, pms etc 4. **** is not another woman or man. 5. **** Is your friend and your relationship glue!
fiddlinfool 4
Learn restraint, **** watching pigs. If you have a dedicated girlfriend, wait for her to share it with.
Kryptonites1 16
not every guy thinks like that.
Zebediabolical 45
#143 You left out: **** doesn't give you a wierd look when you ask it to dress up like Smurfette. **** doesn't tell your friends about your penis size and technique. **** doesn't care if you're using other ****. **** doesn't berate you if you go off too quickly and roll over to go to sleep.
frenchfrywine 0
So guys only have sex with women who look like **** stars ?
christian1509 21
If your gunna watch ****, you gotta pick the quality stuff man. Your dad must be so disappointed to have a son with such a poor choice in ****
christian1509 21
Such poor taste in *****
Ki11erC 18
If you're going to correct yourself at least finish the job. *you're 2 more aside from that as well.
Tendou_fml 12
Why is such a small error something to obsess about? It's fine if he forgot an apostrophe and used the wrong form of you're. Why is it so bothersome?
Sanchez1409 6
LMAO! Break up with the her. Your dad's comment was funny! xP
brook823 24
Why would she care if you watch ****?
Khaleesi_26 30
Some girls have issues with it. They think that they aren't satisfing thier boyfriend's needs, if they need to watch ****. Or they have low self-estem, and get jealous of the woman in the videos. Some of my friends won't let their boyfriends watch it, for those reasons and more. Personally, I could care less. Just depends on the person.
Im2Shy 16
#25, I agree with you totally. I don't understand what the big problem is with a guy watching this, it's better than him cheating!
danm19 15
I agree with what she said. It can be seen by the girl as disrespectful, or that the **** stars are prettier then them. For me I could care less if the girl I am seeing wanted to watch it.
nevm 12
Exactly how much less could you care?
siggy_mcsigx 22
I'm a girl in a relationship and I occasionally watch ****. My boyfriend is more than enough for me but late at night, bored, when we're not together, well...yeah. I don't know if he does and I don't mind that I don't know because I'm okay with it either way.
RedPillSucks 33
some people believe that **** portrays an unrealistic view of sex and women.
GlitterScribbles 9
I'd be upset if my boyfriend watched ****. It's a misogynistic and harmful industry that abuses the women involved.
dolphins_penny 5
Agreed. It's ridiculous. It's ****. What's next, is she going to get pissed because he likes watching a movie and thinking the woman in it is attractive. We both watch **** and for us it Amps up out sex life. Gives us ideas to try.
CoffeeChickBlows 13
63 - Shit's supposed to come out of your ass, not your mouth. "Misogynistic and harmful", "abuses the girls involved"? Give me a break.
blueeyedbeast17 8
I personally don't want my boyfriend watching ****. I'm not a jealous or strict girlfriend. I just don't want him looking and getting pleasure from other naked women. I should be the only one he adores naked. :) But also **** can control a persons life. I have a close friend who was addicted to **** and it destroyed his marriage. At that point it is extreme, but it still can have negative effects on relationships
blueeyedbeast17 8
It does lol. Most women don't look like that in real life. And a lot of things that go on during **** don't really happen and some are "extreme", you could say
blueeyedbeast17 8
"Either I cheat or watch ****. Take your pick." Lol either way he's getting pleasure from other women
squideth 18
65 it's true. Do some research on the brutality mainstream **** is all about, and the abuse that goes along with it. Might open your firmly shut eyes a bit.
Lizardgirl 7
Uhhh most women in the **** industry voluntarily choose to be a part of it (at least in the mainstream **** industry). Many women even take pride in their work and feel empowered. The whole generalizing the **** industry as a whole as being misogynistic because it's traditionally been catered towards men is complete crap.
riddle143 15
71, jealous or strict girlfriend? There's nothing more immature than "don't do (blank) or I'll leave you." Of course there are things we're not comfortable with our significant other doing, but we're each our own person and a relationship is about mutual respect not being strict and controlling with each other. Not gonna get into the debate of whether or not **** is bad, but equating it to cheating is neurotic. I'm a guy. I have no attachment to the woman in a porno I watch. I get off on watching the act take place, when I'm in a relationship I normally imagine it's me and my gf doing those acts, not the actors. Your argument sounds just a tad bit insecure to me.
im_a_black_guy 10
You do know that you have to audition to be a **** star right and the girls want to have sex
sturschaedel 27
#57 And it does. But then nobody really believes that Mickey Mouse is really a real mouse going on dates with Minnie Mouse. **** is "just a movie" too, it isn't supposed to be realistic. #71 You do sound a bit insecure if you think watching **** is the same as getting off over another woman. **** plays out fantasies that sometimes wouldn't work in a real relationship (i.e. threesomes, fetish that the partner isn't into), and it offers instant gratification if the partner isn't available or in the mood at that time. Addiction is a whole other story, and in that case it was the addiction that destroyed the marriage, not the ****. To say people in a relationship shouldn't watch **** because one person's **** addiction destroyed his marriage is the same as saying people in a relationship can't have a glass of wine with dinner occasionally because one alcoholic destroyed his/her marriage with the alcohol abuse.
siggy_mcsigx 22
Well, to be honest....**** is to sex what McDonalds is to Food. Unless it's the erotica couples karma-sutra how-to pornos, Don't take sex tips from ****...well you can but don't expect it to be fantastic. Most of the positions are specific to good camera angles, not to the woman's pleasure. Most orgasms are faked. Very hardcore stuff that is quite abusive to the girls (the shelf life on average nowadays is 3 months, because the girls' bodies cannot handle much more than that) be very careful and always be 100% certain your partner is consenting fully before trying it out. And don't forget to Kiss and keep that intimacy, which **** does its best not to show.
blueeyedbeast17 8
I don't believe I ever mentioned telling my boyfriend that he can't watch **** or I'm leaving him. I just mentioned that I don't particularly like it, and he, thankfully for me, has no interest in it. Good try though
blueeyedbeast17 8
And also, my point is definitely not that **** is bad. I just stated my own opinion of ****.
thes7274473 19
I've heard of people that got dumped for masturbating because that's "just like cheating." People are ridiculous.
kayladayla 13
I can't understand someone not being okay with their SO watching ****. It's fkn 2014 like we practically breathe wifi, and the availability and convenience of **** is beautiful.