Today, my girlfriend and I were making love in the backseat. Being in the moment we didn't notice the car moving. We DID notice the pole that stopped us though. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend and I were fooling around in his car when things got hot and heavy and we decided to climb in the back. After we finished we started to put our clothes back just as a someone's brights flooded into the car. It was a cop, and he had been there the entire time. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were starting to get hot and heavy in my truck at our favorite park. We started going at it and we were both butt naked when I saw a car pull into the lot. Not only was it a cop car, but the first thing the cop asked my girlfriend was, "Are you being held against your will?" FML
Today, my boyfriend and I pulled over to have sex in his mother's car. It was going great until I leaned back onto the horn, waking up our whole neighborhood. FML
Today, I was driving to work, following my girlfriend's car. I looked down to change the radio station and felt a large bump. I rear-ended my girlfriend. FML
Today, I drove my girlfriend home around 11pm to her garage where we started to have sex. When she came to climax she slipped and hit her head. Her parents heard the crash and came down; we were both still naked, and she was unconscious. FML
Today, as my girlfriend was dropping me home, our goodbye kiss got kind of heavy. Still parked in my drive, we had fast, frenzied sex. After, we realised that she had never put the hand brake on and that we had rolled down my drive, blocking my dad who was patiently waiting to pull in. FML
Today, I was making love to my boyfriend on the back bumper of my car. After he finished he told me he felt like he was riding a seahorse. FML
Today, I made love to my girlfriend. I penetrated her for a while, then stopped to get my breath back... She carried on moaning even though I'd stopped moving. FML
Today, I was walking down the street hand in hand with my girlfriend. I couldn't help but stare at a gorgeous girl as she bent down to pick something up. It was such a great sight, I didn't notice the metal telephone pole directly in my path. FML
Today, while my girlfriend and I were getting it on, she suddenly stopped and yelled "STOP!". I stopped, scared I'd hurt her. She then yelled "HAMMER TIME!" and started to dance. We never finished. FML
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Top comments
FMLephant 2
You don't make love in the car, you **** in the car!
Jessi2487 0
need insurance? there's an app for that.
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Comments (93)
hairt 4
op's name said 'remember the parking brake' tsktsktsk ydi :/ but you had a fun time huh ;)
ClubsBreakHearts 2
Haha yeah the name makes the FML so much more funny :)
kyarush 10
ha get pooped on
xStiina 0
fail...
bri_random 0
you could always tell your girlfriend to work the pole until y'all get enough money to fix the car. :)
DLTsandwich 5
HAHAHA. Good one.
catsareahmazing 0
I think Op is white. So she actually has some shame.
jpark5 0
cockblocked by a pole...oh the irony.
discrazypimp 0
at least you didn't have some old guy staring at you...ha ha
mrahhhhh 21
Your girlfriend's been cheating on you with a work colleague. He tripped the parking brake, watched you make love to his sweetheart, and destroyed your bumper. He also has relationships with many other women and may have seen a lot of STDs in his lifetime. But nobody dares speak a word, as he is the reason why your girlfriend has a steady job, and without him her place of work would cease to attract costumers. Strip R. Pole strikes again. "Thunderclap"
MoustacheHat 0
Cars are made for driving, no?
Shaggy_92 5
dipshit.
tnlander 20
two words: Parking Brake