Today, my German Shepherd decided to bark at, then attack, a painted rock. At least I know I'm protected from inanimate objects. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my fully grown, 90-pound German Shepherd sniffed and wagged his tail as a guy mugged me. FML
Today, I was walking in the park when I was hit on the shin by a red ball. I was confused, until it was followed by an enormous German Shepherd dog going at top speed. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I started fighting. Instead of arguing for herself, she decided to set her puppy on me. Only "Puppy" is the name of her fully-grown police-trained German Shepherd. FML
Today, I went for a run, and my own dog attacked me. FML
Today, my house was robbed. My two 70-pound German Shepherds obeyed me when I told them to attack. They also obeyed the robber when he said, "Sit". FML
Today, my dog was about to get hit by a tree branch, so I yelled for him to move. He got mad and started barking at me. And got nailed by the tree branch. FML
Today, my boyfriend's vicious dog, which he got as a security measure and growls and barks at me whenever I go near it, was caught on our security camera playing like a puppy with a burglar, while the other two burglars cleaned out all our valuables. FML
Today, I was mauled by my own dog. I own a Chihuahua. FML
Today, I noticed my parents replaced my senior picture that hung on our living room wall with a painted one. Of our German Shepherd. FML
Today, the dog went nuts at 3am. I searched the yard with a spotlight and machete. Nothing. He may actually just be an asshole. FML
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Top comments
error404n0tf0und 21
keep him away from your pet rock!!
DrJesse 10
At least you know if that Travelocity bastard tries to kill you,your dog will **** his work up.
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Comments (50)
enduriwolf 19
haha my 6 month old white german shepherd protects me even against trash cans :) someone can be hiding in there hahaha
ccjl11 2
Ok, this is not an FML. There is absolutely nothing wrong with your life based on that. If that makes you think your life sucks, you really need to rethink what's important. If I saw my dog do that I would just laugh.
mannyz123 8
They tend to do that.. Mine barked at drywall sheets for half an hour
ScenicSubterfuge 39
I wonder what was painted on it>.
Quadroblitz 10
Maybe it was a rock golem in an infant stage.
misswallflower 8
Well hey, imagine what will happen when a real intruder comes. If he'll attack a rock, then he'll probably kick an intruders ass.
CaroAurelia 12
I had a Collie (sweet as sugar, but about the least intelligent dog I've ever met, bless his soul) who barked at a statue of St. Francis.