Today, my friends and I went to the strip club for my birthday. I now know how my sister is paying for her new car. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, it's my birthday and my friends and I went to our favorite pub to celebrate. As I'm a little broke at the moment, they all offered to buy me birthday drinks. Which I later learned meant that they would order them for me and bring them to the table, but put everything on my tab. FML
Today, I realized how sad my life is when for my 18th birthday, I went to a strip club, by myself, in GTA V. FML
Today, I spent $400 at the stripclub and got 4 phone numbers. I as walked out of the club, I noticed it was trans-night. FML
Today, to celebrate my older sister's 21st birthday, my parents forced me to take the night off work so we could all go to the casino. Not only is this coming out of my vacation, I wasn't old enough to enter the casino, so I had to sit in the car. FML
Today, I went out to celebrate my birthday with a big group of friends. After waiting in line to get into a club, the bouncer looked me up and down and said, "No fat chicks." My friends went into the club without me and left me to take a $100 taxi home alone. FML
Today, I took my friends out to an expensive restaurant for my birthday treat. They had arranged for a surprise birthday cake for me which I cut, very happily, while they chanted birthday wishes. When the bill came, I discovered I was supposed to pay for my great 'surprise' cake. FML
Today, is my 21st birthday. My friends took me to a bar to celebrate, knowing I don't drink. I'm now in charge of driving my friends home after they've had an awesome night. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My wife took me to my favorite restaurant for dinner. She made me pay for my birthday dinner, along with hers. She also got me a gift card to HER favorite store. FML
Today, I dropped off my 19 year old daughter at her first job. It's at a strip club. FML
Today, it was my 16th birthday. My surprise was a new car, that is now in the side of the garage because my mom lost control while driving it around front. FML
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Top comments
BIEBERSLAYER 10
please tell me you didn't get a lap dance from her.
HahaYDI 0
Did you get some sort of family discount?
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Comments (377)
farfulz 6
oh gawd you poor thing! awkward!
aprilmayjune93 0
that's gonna be awkward at the dinner table..
FML_14u2c 14
A good brother will keep that knowledge between him and her.
ariannaimelda 7
So she went into the family business?
kemando 22
you pay her?
_NoobsRapedMe 2
Make her buy you things and you won't say anything about her "Dirty little secret" .
Lights_Out_fml 6
Kinda awkward getting lap dances with your sister watching..
rachel_potter 13
kinda awkward watching your sister GIVE lapdances
HomeAl0ne 20
Even more awkward if it is your sister doing the dancing.
fuckyoulife16 0
nice bro! you enjoy it?
MadeToCommentOnT 0
...surprise?
cjmonaghan 6
at least now you can ask her to borrow money.
ILUVMSC 5
that really suxx