Today, my fiancé told me he wants a security guard to come with us on our honeymoon to Hawaii. Apparently, watching Dog the Bounty Hunter has made him feel unsafe. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I'm on vacation. I spent $4000 to surprise my boyfriend on a trip to Hawaii. We have been together over a year. Turns out, he hates the outdoors. He's mad at me for bringing him here and is upset at everything. He's in the room reading, I'm at the bar drinking $10 Mai Tai's. FML
Today, I found out that my fiancé is going to be deployed on our wedding day. FML
Today, my fiancée decided to go on a "vacation." Our wedding is tomorrow. FML
Today, my fiancé suggested we bring his elderly mother with us on our honeymoon. FML
Today, my wife is refusing to go on our honeymoon because the resort we chose won’t allow pets. She’s now angry with me for not checking before we booked the place, and is threatening divorce if I go without her. I told her we could just get a dog sitter, but she refuses. Oh well. FML
Today, I found out less than three weeks before my wedding that my fiancé will lose his new, great paying job, unless we cancel our nonrefundable honeymoon. FML
Today, a guy came by my house and demanded my fiancé come out and fight. He explained that my fiancé had been stupid enough to not only troll on a local interest forum, but to leave his name and our address, inviting people to "come shut me up if you think you're tough enough." FML
Today, I discovered that my fiancé had responded to an online missed connection posting. He has been emailing, exchanging pictures and making plans to go out with this girl. We are supposed to be married in the fall and just put down the non-refundable deposit on our reception site. FML
Today, I found out via Facebook status that my boyfriend is going to Hawaii with a group of friends, including his ex-girlfriend for a few weeks. When I confronted him about it, he said he didn't think I needed to know, and to mind my own business. I think I'm about to be single. FML
Today, I watched my fiancé ride off on my motorcycle with another girl. FML
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Top comments
JessieBrianneKim 3
Seriously guys, Dog the Bounty hunter is no laughing matter.
cBlackout 13
Tell him the truth. The only illegal activity on Hawaii is dealing pot :) not much goes on there except for amazingness.
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Comments (109)
coldhated 7
He's just looking out for both of you guys (;
Carbonation 0
I don't always over protect my wife, but when I do I hire old A&E reality stars. Those guys from Storage Wars are badass too.
MrHomerSimpson 11
Mmmm... honey.
OMGIFOUNDWALDO 6
meh, they don't need protection, they could see them coming a mile away only by the sight of doug's wife's enormous, fake boobs...
Keyman1212 14
Dog the Bounty Cunter is one of the most racist trashy ***** I've ever seen in my life. There is a place reserved in hell where Satan will use pineapples to sodomize the shit out of people and Dog will be there.
teresa96706 29
With that type of stereotypic mindset op's fiancé has, they probably will need a security guard. Btw, all those little tourist things that say "Hawaiian" are all FAKE It's just to make money. And when someone says "aloha" to you? You dont only say Aloha back.. You say "aloha mai"
Keyman1212 14
What the hell is TMZ?
pancakerocks 1
TMZ is just over dramatic news about things and celebirties that are not imortant. or was that ET... either way.
thrAsHeRr9081 16
You're an idiot, 77.
Keyman1212 14
I'm sorry, I've never seen a Dog the Bounty Hunter episode where Dog and his trash family go and work at a soup kitchen, then help build housing for homeless, and donate money to other charity organizations. I must have missed that somewhere in the filth that is that show.
StoryOfTheYear 15
Pack some heat along with your clothes. Problem solved.
fymother 13
Threesome with an extra beefcake?
slap_u_much 6
I think they have strict gun control
letiflor 3
Aw how funny ^_^
JessieBrianneKim 3
Seriously guys, Dog the Bounty hunter is no laughing matter.
MrTittySprinkles 7
Haha it's funny because he's mentaly handycaped.
FYLDeep 26
And we're supposed to assume the same for you do to your spelling?
bluebeau7 0
due*
FYLDeep 26
I know I make mistakes. I wasn't trying to be a hypocritical douche-bag. I was just pointing out that you shouldn't call someone handicapped, if you can't spell handicapped in the first place.
TheFunnyzach 3
#24 I WANT A HANDY CAPE! I'D FLY AROUND LIKE SUPERMAN!!!
jackeechan 10
Ya damn right
majorbob10 0
Are you super cereal about this?
cBlackout 13
Tell him the truth. The only illegal activity on Hawaii is dealing pot :) not much goes on there except for amazingness.
wisese 0
Are you telling me Hawaii Five-O isn't everyday life there?!?
XmyviolentheartX 13
Actually it's "ice". Lol. I watch the shows because my boyfriend likes it. -_-
Phyre24 17
Hawaii 5-0 is awesome! But yea not much goes on there illegally... that the public knows about.
Lindzer 0
Oooook. I'm praying for sarcasm, cause that's just ignorant.
5fdp4life 1
and ice is actually crystal meth
reggicm 0
That true. I live here, and while tons of people smoke pot...That's pretty much all that happens. Not much crime at all.
LadyLol_fml 15
Imagine it, a big strong guy forced to spend time with you :P
iam_yummylicious 12
Sounds like an epic 3some.
iam_yummylicious 12
Or 6some if you include his wife.
nattynatters 14
Maths is hard!
iam_yummylicious 12
I said 6some because of the OP, the fiancé, Dog the Bounty Hunter, the Dog's wife and her two enormously large fake breasts. If you knew anything about anything you would have gotten the direction of the joke. *shrug*
docscientist 10
No, nobody could tell where your joke was headed.
iam_yummylicious 12
Well. I guess you've never seen his wife and her massive boobs. img.poptower.com/pic-4092/dog-the-bounty-hunter.jpg?d=600
SlyTendencies 1
What grown man gets -that- scared after watching Dog the Bounty Hunter? Its comedy.
Skater5679 4
Apparently, that girls fiancé.
chouter21 10
I've never heard of that lol
xbella 8
so, that's where your honeymoon money is going to? should be fun!
FYLDeep 26
Does your fiancé have an outstanding warrant?