Today, my wife is refusing to go on our honeymoon because the resort we chose won’t allow pets. She’s now angry with me for not checking before we booked the place, and is threatening divorce if I go without her. I told her we could just get a dog sitter, but she refuses. Oh well. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I’m divorcing my wife because she puts her dog above our children. The final straw came when she jumped from a moving golf cart with our daughter in her arms when her stupid ass dog jumped out. Our child could’ve died but all she cared about was the damn dog. FML
Today, my wife isn't speaking to me and is considering separation because I got rid of the puppy she surprised me with for my birthday. She knows I hate dogs and I'm severely allergic to them, but thought it would be a happy case of "Dad later falls in love." FML
Today, my wife kicked me out of my own bed to go and sleep on the sofa because the dog was whining, and would only stop if she was allowed to sleep on my side of the bed. My wife would rather sleep with the dog than me. FML
Today, my wife asked for a divorce. Apparently, me being forced to work on her birthday and our anniversary 3 years in a row is the absolute limit she’s willing to put up with. FML
Today, after we got married five months ago, my wife and I planned a trip to France and Spain as a honeymoon. We’re supposed to be leaving on Saturday. She just told me last night, “I am so not looking forward to the trip.” FML
Today, I was asking my husband to help me finalize plans for our upcoming vacation. He, however, would rather pout and sulk because I don’t want him to bring his mom along. She’s been with us on our last few trips and it’s hard to get any alone time. I’m considering just going alone at this point. FML
Today, my wife of seven years told me that she doesn't trust me with dog-sitting her dog while she leaves to spend Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year's with her family. She ended up calling someone she "trusts" to take care of her dog while I spend the holidays by myself. FML
Today, my girlfriend got evicted for having too many dogs. She expects me to let her and all 5 dogs live in my one-bedroom apartment. When I told her no, that I’d get evicted too, she said that should be a sacrifice I’m willing to make for “our family” if I really loved her. They aren’t even my dogs. FML
Today, our landlord has begun eviction proceedings because he’s received over 100 complaints about our dog, who barks constantly, and who my wife has stubbornly refused to get rid of. My wife has basically forced us to choose between that fucking mutt and being homeless. FML
Today, we are on our honeymoon, at a beautiful resort, and my wife has been in bed crying for two days. She won't talk to me, and every time I come in, she sobs harder and starts hyperventilating. This can't be a good sign. FML
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Top comments
Earl_KarmasBitch 36
If she's threatening divorce because you said anything about going without her that's on you. If she pre-emptively threatened it, let her.
JackWood 21
She's punishing you for not getting a dog friendly hotel and emotionally blackmailing you not to get a sitter, she sounds toxic. I predict a hard life for you.
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Comments (6)
Anderling 33
Did you promise to check and then flake out? Is the dog a support animal of some sort to your wife where she shouldn’t have had to specify? This seems like a very weird reaction from her and I can’t imagine it’s just about not wanting a dogsitter.
Earl_KarmasBitch 36
If she's threatening divorce because you said anything about going without her that's on you. If she pre-emptively threatened it, let her.
guruza 6
How old is your wife bru?
JackWood 21
She's punishing you for not getting a dog friendly hotel and emotionally blackmailing you not to get a sitter, she sounds toxic. I predict a hard life for you.
Blobby McGee 5
massive red flag right there. This broad sounds toxic. Your life with her is going to be hard, I imagine.
Crowned Sataness 12
you married very poorly. take the L and let her leave because your life is about to go downhill and she's going to use the divorce threat constantly. get out before there's kids