hoo flung pu
United States
Today, my dog figured out she can wipe her butthole on my walls after having squeezed out a turd or two. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Steve
Self-defeating move
Today, my dog discovered his new toilet by taking a dump on his own bowl. FML
kiwibox
Ipswich, United Kingdom
Today, my dog had an upset stomach and diarrhea. To avoid a mess on the carpet, I confined her to a gated area in the kitchen with sheets over the floor, so any mess could be cleaned up easily. Instead of going on the sheets, she sprayed shit all up the walls. FML
PerfectTiming
This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff
Eindhoven, Netherlands
Spinning out
Today, my dog decided to poop while inside a revolving door. Before I could do anything, the door swung around and smeared it everywhere. My dog excels at timing. FML
new dog
Gaithersburg, United States
Best foot forward
Today, I found out that my dog is a pro at pooping directly into shoes. FML
aaalias34
United States
Today, my dog farted. Immediately, he turned around to sniff his stink then furiously licked his butthole. He then licked my nose. FML
morphea
Chantepie, France
Today, coming home, I discovered that my dog had left me a beautiful mound of poop in the middle of the corridor. He'd made an effort, though: there was a roll of shredded toilet paper next to it. FML
Anonymous
Puebla City, Mexico
Dirty boy
Today, I discovered that one of my dogs has taken a liking to rolling over his own poop. I found out by petting him. FML
anonymous
Rock Hill, United States
Spray it loud
Today, we learned that our dog can run and urinate simultaneously. The entire house smells like piss. FML
Really
United States
Bad boy
Today, my roommate let his dog out. Not even five minutes later, she walked into my room and dropped a deuce. FML
Username
United States
Well played, you mutt
Today, I cleaned up my dog's crap after my wife asked me. Five minutes later she yelled at me for being lazy as she slammed the door leaving for work. My dog had shat in the exact same spot, apparently to make me look stupid. FML
Top comments
RedPillSucks 33
You can probably sell it at some art museum as abstract paintings. ... Profit!
gc327072 31
Coat the walls in menthol. That'll teach 'er!
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Comments (58)
blackbeltpsycho 16
My dog dragged his butt across our carpet, leaving a very noticeable shit streak. We have new carpet now, so no worries.
tenderteddy82 4
...until he does it again.
mario2012 18
Wow. Not one "shitty situation" joke yet. I'm impressed and happy.
klovemachine 24
Sounds like a... (internet disconnected)
diiiinkleberg 13
... lot of hoopla
Wizardo 34
Now of you live near a race track you may be able to explain the skid marks, otherwise I'm at a loss.
cookie1207 19
My dog does that ob the white carpet....
SWC_Penguin 17
Sometimes I feel like FML is just one big secret weapon made by an undercover society that wants to discourage dog-ownership at all costs.
ShyAnn29 15
That's quite the disturbing image, kind of funny too though!
mosquito19 14
smart dog
bazookajoey 27
I was eating when I read this
olpally 33
Yep, I have two pugs who do the same thing, as it was said in the comments above, they are rubbing out anal glands or whatever it is. ******* nasty as hell.
alycion 39
Hang toilet paper at your dog's ass level. Get video of him wiping his ass on the walls for future laughs. Then take him to the vets. As someone earlier mentioned, there is usually a reason why they scoot. I had a dog who would do the same to my floor whenever he needed his anal glands expressed. A good groomer will do that each time, but the vet can too. I found two grooming sessions a year solved the problem for me.