Today, my dad found my "list". 32 guys, 4 girls. Colour coded as to who I would sleep with again and who I wouldn't, who were virgins, etc. He complimented me on my "organizational skills." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found out that my fiancé has a list with every woman he slept. Chronologically. I'm number 23, out of 27. Our wedding is in two months. FML
Today, I found my girlfriend's list of people she's slept with on her Google docs. There was 11 names after mine. FML
Today, my dad thought it was perfectly acceptable to ask my girlfriend how many guys she screwed before me. FML
Today, I found out my parents have a list of everything I have ever Googled. FML
Today, I found a note in my boyfriend's phone titled "People's I've had sex with". There are also dates next to the notes which represented the day he had sex with them. Not only that it was NOT me who is the last person on the list, but I also realized that the last person on the list was my best friend. And he's a guy. FML
Today, my dad gave my younger brother condoms and a pat on the back, even though he doesn't have a girlfriend. This is after called me a whore after he saw me kissing my long-term boyfriend last week. FML
Today, I found an old USB drive in a drawer and spent the afternoon going through the files, expecting embarrassing photos from school. Instead, I found a spreadsheet I'd made at 16, listing every person I had a crush on, complete with rankings and notes. I'm now terrified someone will find my “Top 10” list. FML
Today, my father decided to tell me in detail when and how he lost his virginity. He even told me what position it was and who this girl was. I will never look at him in the same way again. He also made his hands "have sex". FML
Today, I found a notebook labeled "IMPORTANT INFO" in my boyfriend's nightstand. Looking in, I saw he'd written down a bunch of information about me, like my birthday and things I like. When I asked, he said, "I'm forgetful and didn't want to accidentally be a dick." FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend has checked every girl he has ever slept with for 'vagina teeth'. I'm apparently no exception. FML
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Top comments
JesseJaymz 0
you color coordinating the STD's too? crabs can be red, syphilis green, and the clap can be yellow cause when i think of clapping i think happy.
fisheatsbear 6
is this list like a pokedex? gotta bang em all. xD
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Comments (370)
tayxlovesxchu 0
thats all too many people. and my dad would end me!
taskemus 10
@172 I don't think she's a **** (or that anyone who has a lot of sex because they want to is a ****, for that matter) and I have the healthiest self-esteem of any of my friends. If she was my daughter, I'd be proud of her for taking charge of her own sexuality in a society where that's looked down on. Not specifically at 172: I don't get why so many people even care this much about the sex life of some anonymous person on the internet they don't even know. Girls have sex; get over it, people.
123sploosh 0
it makes me happy to know that there is still humanity out there. thank you taskemus
boredinnapoleon 0
*****...
CooLbEAnS1096 0
Damn, your puss has got to be torn up huh? Kinda like throwing a hot dog down a hallway?
mak3_1t_ra1n 0
so wait, r the "virgins" still virgins or did u rape n steal their virginity?
kitzukitten715 0
You know what? All you haterz can **** off. OP knows what she wants and how to get it. You're just jealous you couldn't get a quarter as much attention. I still have to say fyl cuz OP didn't hide the list well enough, but I'm at a point where I don't even keep a list. I'm the female version of a player. I'm 25 years old and a total ******* nympho. My numbers are at 88 with 5 this year and 17 when I was stationed in Korea. I've been in the game since was 14 and yes, I'm damn proud of it. Did I forget to mention I'm getting married September 12 this year to a guy that knows my full sexual history and lack of STDs? That's right! I'm ******* clean, tight, and DAMN sexy. Beat that, haterz.
JustJess666 0
sweetheart I'm all for equality of both men and women knowing and getting what they want... but being sexually active with nearly 100 people is not a good thing to be proud of . I'm not hating I'm simply stating that personally I feel that sex shouldn't be advertised by how many or how often. it's kinda dumb to brag about how many people slept with you and it isn't about jealousy of lack if attention. trust me I have many people hit on me on a daily basis and I'm sure so do many others who agree with me. I am proud how ever that you are STD free because that means that you were safe and smart and for the tightness congrats on doing your pussy exercises... it's nothing personal hon just an opinion and in my eyes for MEN or WOMEN it's not good to be a *****!
123sploosh 0
go away justjess, you are annoying the crap out of me.
JustJess666 0
then don't read my comments. sorry if I speak my opinion and you can't handle it so you much insult the way I look and say that I annoy you. get over your ******* self **** and do us a favor choke on a dick and die thanks.... that annoying enough sweetie??
JustJess666 0
must*
Freeze_fml 17
Must be like a hot dog in a hallway. Haterz gonna hatez.
Veritas411 0
I'm calling this as NOT an FML... Yes a secret was revealed to a parent, however they were OK with it... its not like OP's promiscuity caused her to be disowned... and to all the haters... OP is a Canadian and did not post her age, nor does she claim to be living with her parents who's to say Dad wasn't visiting from out of town and crashed in the guest room -- I have a spare room, in which I keep an Old computer... maybe Dad was playing minesweeper one night and got nosy about an Excel file Pretty sure age of consent is 16 there... (not that it matters) but for argumenst sake if she "broke the seal" @ 12:01am on her 16th Bday.. and is now around 30 (Dad being coll with it indicates she's at leats in her mid 20's. that is 10-14 years worth of sex... 36 people, 10-14 years is roughly 3.5 - 2.5 people a year. the time frame also covers her time at University which is considered a time of experimentation. a busy college weekend skews the entire curve when you really think about think about it
ttyl99 0
My dad would have killed me though I find that a little odd what u did
NomsdePourquoi 3
... giving handjobs for crack...
buttshapedfruit 0
wow ydi u nasty loose STD infested *****.