Today, my coworker called in to say that he couldn't make it to work today because he was in a coma and asked if I could cover his shift. This isn't the first time he's tried to use this excuse. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my coworker has once again called in and asked me to cover her shift. She does this for every single one of her shifts, and my boss told me that if I don’t cover it, I’ll be fired. I used to have a life, but not anymore. FML
Today, I had to cover for a coworker who didn't turn up for work. He's always late for work and I was pissed off about having to cover for him again, so I said to my colleagues, "He better be either in hospital or dead." Turns out he was dead. FML
Today, I called into work because of a family emergency. My boss was understanding; my coworker? He tore me a new one because his wife wanted him to take the day off, which he didn't because it was going to be a tough day at work. He also threatened to find a way he could get me fired. FML
Today, I was sick, so I emailed my co-workers with a list of my hours, asking if anyone would be willing to cover them for me. I only got one hour covered, and that was during a day I don't even work. FML
Today, I asked a co-worker if he'd cover for me while I slipped out to cash some money at the bank. When I got back, I found out that when he said "yeah, sure" he actually meant "yeah, sure, I'll tell the boss and get your dumb arse suspended". FML
Today, my coworker, who constantly no-shows, ranted to me about his work hours being reduced. He somehow doesn't realize that he's the problem. We're understaffed as of now, so they can't fire him, and I have to be there constantly to make up for him being a lazy ass. My days off have been few and far between. FML
Today, I had a seizure for the first time in months. My fiancé went over to my job to let them know I wouldn't be going in. My boss bitched both of us because I didn't call myself. Sure, I'll get right on that when I'm conscious. FML
Today, after I let my job know I needed time off for a friend's funeral a week ahead of time and they declined to approve it, telling me to call in sick, the day of the funeral arrived and I called in sick, only to come back to a write-up and threats of being fired for not getting it approved in advance. FML
Today, my boyfriend called work because he is sick. Then he called me four times while I was working, to complain that I was working, and then he got mad when I told him I was sick and worked a double shift two days in a row, because apparently that's "insensitive" of me. FML
Today, exactly 19 seconds after I logged on, my boss Zoom-called me to let me know 3 people are out sick, probably until Monday, so if I wouldn’t mind doing their work as well so we don’t fall behind, within working hours, no overtime available. He wasn’t happy when I told him no. FML
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Top comments
subhaan786 19
Surely your manager or whoever isn't dumb enough to fall for someone saying they're in a coma? Like if they're the ones calling in I mean?
theladygamer 10
Seems like your coworker is a special kind of stupid.
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Comments (101)
cardin_06 3
you should tell your co-worker "i don't think coma means what you think it means."
ZannityZan 13
This reminds me of that old joke. A kid calls up his teacher and says in a put-on voice, "I'm afraid Jimmy can't make it in to school today - he's got a bad cold." The teacher says, "Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. Who's calling?", and the kid replies, "My dad." But seriously, if I were you, I'd be like, "Dude, do you actually know what a coma is...!?" Don't let him get away with an excuse that is so obviously false, especially if he keeps trying to use it in order to get out of work!
Chibi_Kitten 24
Reminds me of the joke were the math teacher tells his students that the test the next day cannot be made up. A student then asks "What if I am unable to because I am sore from vigorous sexual activity ". The teacher then replied "Write the test with your other hand then."
vikky538 29
and he was able to make a call and talk to you in coma......thats a miracle..
MarkWayne24 7
Tell him that you're dead for the day.....
blackonblight 33
Ah yes, the old "Spending a year dead for tax reasons." Excuse.
fuckercakes 21
This isn't your average everyday stupid This is.... Advanced Stupid.
ViviMage 40
You can't speak in a coma..... How dumb is he!?
sweetestname 12
Multiple times he used the same excuse... that must mean one of two things. It's true... or insanity.
BeepBeepSwerve 9
if you put the coworker on the scale of stupidity, he would probably break it
DuhhBearz 8
Instead of saying a coma he probably should have said he was on his period and forgot tampons -_-
Tailored 15
My brain hurts!