Today, my cousin left her undisciplined demon-child at my house for Christmas. This child destroyed the other children's gifts and made so much noise that the neighbors called the police. The adults can't really discipline her while her mother is away, so all we can do is apologize in this child's wake. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had to babysit my 7-year-old niece while my brother bought Christmas presents. After he left, she walked up to me and said in a very dark voice, "I'm gonna make you hate children!" Now my apartment looks like a bomb site. FML
Today, my 7-year-old cousin has been having raging temper tantrums, added to an inability to tell the truth, and a disturbingly sociopathic nature. I'm pretty sure I'm seeing a psychopath in the making, and I'm stuck living here for two months. FML
Today, I was babysitting my nephew. He was acting up, so instead of spanking him, I put him in the corner for timeout. He screamed and thrashed and kicked the walls so hard my neighbors called the police. My sister wasn’t answering her phone, and I had to explain why a 7-year-old was acting like that. FML
Today, my mom got drunk and decided to unwrap all my Christmas gifts and throw them at the wall. Ho, ho, ho. FML
Today, my spoiled step-daughter had extra chores to do for breaking the rules. She called my wife at work, complained about the chores, then my wife called me and said that she didn't want to deal with the drama. It ended with, "Make her do something else!" WTF! She chooses her own punishment! I hate this kid, seriously. FML
Today, I usually take my daughter to daycare; my wife had to drop her daughter off at 8. The kid refused to get up, making them late. Wife argues with me, claiming I made her late. She said hurtful things and left late at 8:30. We haven't spoken and probably won't for the rest of Christmas week. I love Christmas. FML
Today, it's Christmas Day. Normally, my family would be opening gifts right now. Instead, my mom is holding our gifts hostage until we clean the house. Apparently, "The presents aren't going anywhere." FML
Today, my mom's friend came over. She brought her son and claimed that we could have bonding time. I ended up chasing the five-year-old around the house for an hour. After they'd left, my mom saw that the little kid had broken a lamp and a clock. She then said I had to pay for it using my money. FML
Today, I saw my upstairs neighbor outside getting the mail. She asked how my day was, and then apologized that the sound of her baby's crying through the walls kept me up last night. Apparently she heard me when I yelled at 2am for her fucking demon spawn to shut up. FML
Today, I punished my new dog for taking a shit inside by putting him in the kennel. He punished me by breaking out of the kennel and destroying everything in my house. Including Christmas presents. FML
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Top comments
RayneSmytson 24
If the child is left in your care you certainly can discipline the child. That's not to say to smack the child or anything, but you certainly can do what you need to pull the kid into line. You're there to supervise and keep the child safe and others safe from the child, not make friends and apologise for the child.
MrsHumanFrog 19
I refuse to watch children that Im not allowed to discipline, Period. Family or not, if the kid knows they can get away with it, they will.
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Comments (60)
LostInTheZone11 29
Maybe this sounds cruel, but I would consider chaining him up to cinder blocks.
Jared900DUmpling 30
I suggest to Hold her down with soggy clothes and breezeblocks.
InfiniteSunshine 32
#1 rule of looking after another person's child(ren), you do not hit or spank them, regardless of your stance on these matters. You can discipline them, there's lots of ways to do this, but don't hit another person's kid. Not only because it isn't your place, but for your own protection and safety. If that child says you hit them, that can open you up to abuse charges, even sexual abuse because spanking is on an intimate area. Even with permission, I wouldn't risk it. Edit - this was for under comment #3, in response to #31, but for some reason it will not post there.
USMC10Rex12451 16
#36 It was a joke
FacesOfHumanity 14
But what if that psycho comes at you with a knife. I gotta hit him. But then I think back to your comment, "you do not hit or spank or spank them" and then I die for listening to you.
Jared900DUmpling 30
My dad beat me with jumper cables and im a perfect child now
KingSquisher 13
Kill it with fire?..... okay, too far
RayneSmytson 24
If the child is left in your care you certainly can discipline the child. That's not to say to smack the child or anything, but you certainly can do what you need to pull the kid into line. You're there to supervise and keep the child safe and others safe from the child, not make friends and apologise for the child.
Mortoli 30
what do you mean no smacking around? im sorry but if that lil shit is left in my care and shes doing all that she getting an ass whoopin and a timeout and while her mom is away im sorry but the adults in this family have to step up and act like an adult to this kid... letting her do all that is not ok and if her mom complains all you gotta do is say she needed discipline its tough love kids.
sirrubberduckie 37
#31, if you strike my child multiple times, I'm calling the police. Don't do that. It doesn't help the child's behavior in the long run. It only helps you release your anger and frustration on the child. Talk to the kid and punish them, set boundaries and take away privileges, etc., but don't hit them.
diver1102 1
and here we have the liberal and conservative parenting styles. lol.
KrystalKruspe 4
I mean that's giving a lot of credit to the same style used to keep slaves obedient.
Stuffaluffagus 25
And that's why your child is going to grow up to be a monster
sirrubberduckie 37
Let me be clear: I would not tolerate that behavior in my daughter, or any child I was watching. I would simply not permit it. That said, "smacking around" a kid, or giving them an "ass whoopin" is basically considered child abuse by the law in most parts of the country. My daughter gets straight A's, and strangers comment on how well-behaved she is. I've never spanked her in her life, but I certainly have punished and disciplined her. No major psychological organization recommends physical punishment, because there's nothing that can be accomplished by "ass whoopin" a child that can't be accomplished more easily by other means of discipline. I don't care how many times you downvote me. You're free to be wrong.
piinksock 17
I'm just wondering if you have children?
Sunshine56 17
Does she actually respect you though? Because taking things away and putting in timeout only makes kids want to bend the rules.
shannon.elizabeth 13
and smacking Aparently doesn't make your child resent you? f your kids life
MrsHumanFrog 19
I refuse to watch children that Im not allowed to discipline, Period. Family or not, if the kid knows they can get away with it, they will.
rustybucket 24
She's in your care, so I see absolutely no problem with you disciplining her. Especially if she's that destructive. If I were you I'd tell your cousin to either discipline her child or never expect you to watch after her again.
Selina1407 11
how old is she?
Aylla89 3
Like hell you can't discipline them. Someone has to if the parents won't. Otherwise at 18, guess what, laws or mommy/ can't protect them from assholish behavior anymore and things would get even uglier than a little spanking. Barring a mental illness a normal kid can be controlled whether it's nice means or not.
Mysterybounty 6
If the child is in your care you can discipline them as you see fit. He obviously does not have a strong figure in his life to teach him wrong from right, you need to talk to your cousin about that as it is not OK.
xx000o 27
One of duct tapes many uses is restraining unruly children.
Cyberiian1 4
The way i see it, you can discipline the kid and make her life so miserable that she either 1: won't want to come back, or 2: her mom won't bring her back. Win- win either way.