Today, my boyfriend picked me up from school. It was an unusually sweet gesture from him, and I was flattered. That is, until he told me to sit my ass in the back, so his dog could ride in front with him. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend and I were driving around town in his car. To my surprise he took me out to lunch. As we were leaving, a girl walks up and asks if he had room for one more for a ride, sadly he only has two seats in his car. Guess who had to walk! FML
Today, I wanted to surprise my roommate by picking her up from class with her dog. Her dog decided to surprise me by dumping a load on my passenger seat. FML
Today, my boyfriend picked me up bridal-style to carry me to our bed. As he carried me through the bedroom door, the dog ran between his legs and sent us both crashing to the ground. FML
Today, my boyfriend's car broke down on the way to the gym, so he called his dad to give us a ride. On the way, his dad talked about how much he hates me and our relationship, as if I wasn’t sitting in the back seat directly behind them. FML
Today, a guy I liked came to pick me up for our first date. As he opened the car door, I noticed nearly an inch of dog hair on every surface of the interior. Not wanting to get it all over me, I asked if we could take my car instead. He was so “insulted” he drove off and left me standing there. FML
Today, I awoke in bed with my boyfriend and his dog. After some pushing and prodding, I thought my boyfriend was trying to move the dog out of the way to cuddle with me. It turns out, he was moving the dog closer to him. My boyfriend would rather spoon with his dog than me. FML
Today, I pulled up next to my boyfriend at a stoplight. He was in the back of a police car. FML
Today, my friend and I offered a hot girl a lift home from campus. I was sitting in the passenger seat and she climbed in behind me. As I adjusted my seat forward to give her more leg room, my friend pulled off - slamming my seat back into her legs. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were driving back to college. He broke up with me 2 hours into the 3 hour drive. I had to sit in the car with him for the last hour. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were riding in the back seat of his mom’s car and she kept talking at him non-stop. He responded only in grunts. When at some point I informed her that her son had been asleep for several minutes, she just kept on talking to him anyway. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
syki 22
Guess you're not his main bitch.
BubbleGrunge 18
Next time he ask for sex, tell him the dog is probably more than willing.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (133)
pcentral 17
What a bitch ;)
BunchieRules 31
What a bad pun. ;)
notyobitch 0
What a funny reply :)
innavoiG 9
A man and his dog have a special bond, OP needs to respect that.
h8rs_get_at_me 4
70- i don't think carter had a dog...
VooDooCarrie91 19
88- Carter had Seabreeze, the racing dog that Brian "violated".
motoxracer156 5
Dog.... Truly a mans best friend
softball141414 1
Haha ;) msg me u seem funny lol
Mariebaz 11
Great guy...
LolOrDeath 4
Mans best friend
SamanthaCassieL 10
She got a ride. Sucks that his dog got the front, but she still got a ride either way. Doesn't overly suck that much.
mars13_fml 8
Next time she goes to his house and they are watching a movie she should let the dog sit on the couch and he can get the floor since he is such a great guy :p
xoconnie 8
dump that jerk ball!!!!!! wow, that just happened... his dog is viewed as more important than you.
kjklopu 1
Yes he is. My dawgs dogs and doggs always come first
MrGoat 2
Why was this thumbed down?
syki 22
Guess you're not his main bitch.
gc327072 31
"Bitches in the front, hoes in the back."
Inheritance 10
If his dog is male then the saying, "Bros before hoes" fits perfectly in this situation. But sorry to hear it OP. Maybe reject the ride if he acts like that?
jacsoccerdude3 10
Correction. OP isn't his bottom bitch.
ryannroxers 5
He never said his girlfriend was a hoe!
sidewaysponytail 0
Tell him to get his ass out so you can drive!
littlemsweirdo 12
Um, it's still his car. I would walk out the car than be with his rude ass.
zandalee 20
This is supposed to be the romantic part of your relationship! Imagine how he would treat you once you were married! (If you were silly enough to marry him...)
esines 9
If he's really that much of a dick you should dump him
SystemofaBlink41 27
It's his DOG! I'd put him up front too! Actually, I'm kidding but dumping him is a tad drastic, don't you think?
walmartpaysme 15
Normally, I don't agree with this advice. However, if he has no more respect for OP than to treat her like that, this is not a relationship worth her time.
TrueTriage 16
I'm with 15 here.... People on FML seem to be a bit extreme in comments granted what OP's boyfriend did is rude its not worth dumping him. Isn't it supposed to be the imperfections make some of the best times in relationships?
walmartpaysme 15
When a man puts his dog ahead of his woman, it's time to move on.
Teyros 24
OP did mention that her boyfriend told her to "sit her ass in the back"... Sounds like she can do without a guy like him.
amandajlucas2015 2
OP boyfriend does not respect her just from the phrasing of the words.. U can tell.. If it was a simple situation of the dog has an issue with sitting in the back he could have said something along the lines of," honey can u plz sit in the back my dog doesn't do well back there. OP needs to think about if she really wants to be treated like that
TheMathMajor 26
And the fact that picking her up was an "abnormally sweet gesture" is also not a good sign. What is sweet about going to pick someone up?
msjoyfull84 0
I treat my dog with more respect than men, thumb me down all you want but she's never done me wrong and loves me unconditionally......
downtime 13
65, You're making relationships sound like employment. Many couples - mine included - are quite happy to talk to each other like that because it's meant in jest. It honestly doesn't sound like that huge a deal, and if I were in a relationship where goofing around was inappropriate because you expect me to express every point in a particular dialogue then that would be the most depressing state to be in. Relationships are enough work without adding the additional bullshit. Enjoy being single forever :)
walmartpaysme 15
102, if he had said, "sit your ass in the back so my dog can sit up front with me! Haha, I'm just kidding baby get up here." THAT would be a joke. He wasn't joking. He treated his dog better than he treated her.
BubbleGrunge 18
Next time he ask for sex, tell him the dog is probably more than willing.
BossPathfinderGM 14
That's the way!
imayra64 4
lol amen !
dinorider_fml 4
Doggie stlye
softball141414 1
(:
olpally 33
Give him a dog biscuit for treating you like a bitch then. Make him sit down and beg for it too.
larouche362 10
#7 wouldn't that be a type of foreplay? Lol
Snazzy_Snaz 17
If he ever asks you for doggy style, just bring the dog to him
littlemsweirdo 12
I know right,do it and walk out like a boss. Lol, that would be such a great and hilarious moment !
Dadothy 8
So there's a bitch up front and in the back...
EagorLuvsBigFoot 8
Unless the dog is masculine
Ozuru 11
At least he didn't make you sit on towels like another FML...
walmartpaysme 15
I would rather sit on the towels than take the backseat to a dog.
Ozuru 11
I was trying to say it could be worse. He could have made her sit on towels in his back seat - so she didn't dirty his seats.