Today, my boyfriend and I had sex to music, which we hadn't done before. I was getting close when it cut to commercial. I was so turned off by the idea of coming during an ad break that I didn't come at all. Thanks Spotify. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was watching TV with my husband, and he started getting frisky. When the commercial break started, we started having sex. When he came, there were still two commercials left before the show resumed. FML
Today, I was making love to my girlfriend and was pretty impressed with myself for lasting through multiple songs. Then I realized her ipod was playing a medley. I only lasted 3 1/2 minutes. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were making love. I was really close to climaxing, when he suddenly stopped, smirked, and said, "Hang on, I'm buffering." FML
Today, my girlfriend and I lost our virginity to each other. Before, I reached over to her computer and put on "Your Body is a Wonderland". Surprisingly, I lasted through the song and didn't realize her iTunes was on random. "Rape Me" by Nirvana came on. I still finished. FML
Man City
Today, while getting intimate with my boyfriend, I thought he went to change the music on his phone. He'd actually stopped mid-action just to check sports scores. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He decided to make gun sound effects as he came. FML
Giggle loop
Today, I decided it was time to lose my virginity to my boyfriend. After about ten minutes he started going faster and his stomach was slapping against mine. It was making a weird sound so I started laughing. Apparently that wasn't sexy and he went soft. My first time and we didn't even finish. FML
Today, I thought it would be really hot to watch porn while my girlfriend and I were having sex. I got so hot and aroused that I came before the previews even ended. That was less than one minute. FML
Pick your moments, dude!
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a romantic night. As we were having sex, he decided to say, "Look mom, no hands!" and it totally ruined the mood. FML
Fascinated
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. The TV was on with the volume low, as we had been too preoccupied to turn it off. All of a sudden, my boyfriend stopped mid-thrust. He was watching the TV. House MD was on. He'd stopped to watch the differential diagnosis. FML
Top comments
Grant Lowe 2
That's what ya get for not subscribing. Cheap ass lol.
saffy66 34
Play a CD or iPod if you want control over the playlist and want to avoid ruining the mojo with unwanted ads.
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Comments (31)
sayno2mermaids 10
This should be an ad for spotify premium hahaha
RichardPencil 32
According to your story, your username is oxymoronic. There are no such things as ******* Ads! Ads ruin *******.
rustybucket 24
Gotta be about that Spotify premium life
Zmbqueen 5
Premium Spotify for premium sex. :D
FlexMaster 10
you shoulda just downloaded the songs and put them on loop. (People overthinking easy solutions). I pushed both buttons.
rifletwirler92 15
I've been on this site for almost 10 years now and I finally get one published (hence why I didn't use this account for publishing)! Haha. So to answer why I don't have Premium, because 1) yes, I'm cheap, and 2) I don't use Spotify that often anyways, I've gone months between using it at times, so it'd be a little silly to pay for it. Haven't bought and/or really used CD's for over 10 years either so that solution doesn't really work either. We had a pretty big laugh about it so no harm, no foul.
anaheimangels40 11
You Didn't Cum because the music changed to a commercial? That shows that you were paying more attention to the music than being in the moment with your boyfriend while he pounds your pussy.
Defleppar93 0
Hey at least you got your next full 30m of ad free sexa
drtoboggan 11
*annoying generic music fades in abruptly* *volume increases 110%* "WANT A BREAK FROM THE ADS?"
BicBoiSpyder 0
That's what you get for streaming instead of downloading. Music Downloader master race.