Today, most of my neighbours came to my house in an angry mob to complain about my dog barking. I don't have a dog. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got several noise complaints from various neighbours about my "dog that won't stop barking". I don't own a dog, my neighbour owns the noisy dog. She sent me a complaint as well. FML
Today, I went over to my neighbours' to politely complain about their dog, who had been barking non-stop for hours. This issue has been going on for months, and I finally decided today, of all days, was the day to resolve it. When I got there, they'd just got home from giving birth at the hospital. FML
Today, I don't think my neighbours realize that, by getting that dog they have been wanting, they ruined the peace and quiet of the entire neighbourhood, consisting of ten houses. I'm the person underneath whose window that dog barks every day - mostly when I'm either trying to fall asleep or wanting to sleep in. FML
Today, I was screaming at my neighbor to shut his dog up. After 30 minutes of bellowing, he yelled back that it was my dog that was barking. He was right. FML
Today, I went to let my dog inside because she was barking. I saw my neighbour standing at my fence, screaming that she was going to kill my dog with a shovel for barking at her. My dog was only doing it because my neighbor was putting her trash in my garbage bin. This isn't a new thing. FML
Today, I was woken up by my neighbour's dog losing its mind, and I remembered reading a story about someone ignoring a dog and later finding out that their car had been stolen. Paranoid, I went outside to check on mine. Nope. Just the damn dog barking at one thirty in the morning. FML
Today, I went to check if my neighbours were home to return their dog, having looked after her for a few days. I looked in the window and the place was empty. They'd moved house and stuck us with their dog. FML
Today, despite not having noisy kids, barking dogs or do I play loud music, yet apparently I still cause enough noise by walking around and watching TV that the neighbours called the cops with a noise complaint. The cops actually came. Since when is living quietly in my own home a police matter? FML
Today, the neighbor's dog has been barking for over 5 hours. It is barking directly at my window. FML
Today, I came home to find a window broken and my neighbours searching inside my house. Apparently, they'd heard a small child asking for help inside my house. I recently taught my dog to "talk." FML
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Top comments
klol_fml 11
The neighbours must be barking mad if they think you have a dog.
kAPISH 29
Bark at them like it were you all the time.
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Comments (68)
perdix 31
Move! If all of the neighbors hate you so much they'll all fabricate a dog as an excuse to bitch at you, mob violence can't be far behind.
nvo 6
That should be easy to clarify? Just say that.
buckdharma 38
Dig a grave out in the back yard and inform your lynch mob that someone poisoned your dog's food. Tell them a detective should be knocking on their door soon in accordance with the list you gave him.
MidnaLink 35
Let me guess, you're a screamer during sex.
raesos91 26
more like a howler xD
aj94w 4
What's wrong with your neighbors? They form a mob when a dog barks?
metreman 19
check the house and see if there a ghost dog if there is show them the ghost dog
Kingbreezy04 10
"I'm sorry guys, right after Tonya (or whatever name you want to use) died, I have been so lonely. So I did something that I don't usually do, I went to drink my sorrows away at the Neon Moon (or a similar country song), and I brought home a woman. After some talking and crying things got and heavy. The point of the story is she told me her and her husband liked to role play as animals, dogs, cats, chickens etc... Her husband died in a tragic accident and she hasn't role played since. Needless to say I was the " bad dog" and she was the upset owner. Also your newspaper might be missing, I peed the carpet." If that doesn't work OP, time to move.
astro20 5
I could see it now. Pitchforks and torches in hand lol.
Wiringify 22
Well stop barking.
siranthony87 5
Be quieter during sex